Dopers have come from all over to celebrate.
The food for this spread includes three large tom turkeys and two baked hams. Mashed potatoes, succotash, cranberries, green-bean casserole, and plenty of salad…
Chilled beer, fine wines, non-alcoholic cider, root beer and hot coffee to drink. Pumpkin, mince, and apple pie. Egg nog, vanilla ice cream.
Plenty of space for those of the Teeming Millions who could come. Serving the food and maintaining order in the banquet hall are a motley of celebrities, to be named here and there in the thread. Presiding over the ceremonies is Cecil Adams himself.
About half an hour before the scheduled dinner time, Dopers start arriving, and show their invitations. Clearing the ID’s at the door is none other than…
…Tom Selleck. Baker is aswoon because she has wanted to meet him ever since he was Thomas Magnum. It’s like someone read her mind, as to whom she wanted to see. Baker hands him the bread rolls she brought, and drifts off to dither blissfully. She doesn’t notice the person taking coats is…
I will bring collard greens for those of us who can’t relate to green bean casserole.
I’ll be following monstro around to make sure I get some of those collard greens. She won’t mind because I have cornbread to go with the greens. 
Ok, to sorta get back on track…
swampbear hands off his coat to Tom Cruise while admiring the fact that old Tom has finally found something he’s good at. Da bear wanders over to the bar and notices that the bartender is none other than…
Bacon-wrapped water chestnuts. Hundreds of them!
The bartender is David Lee Roth. He has some great stories! I’m bringing potato chips and my family’s (in)famous clam dip. Is this an all-day buffet?
Amongst the roving waiters in penguin suits serving Zeldar’s BWWC, I spy…
The bartender is not what you’d expect. No, not me, I want to party. It’s Tiny Tim, back from the afterlife to entertain us with his ukelele. I do wish he could find a new tune.
I offer you some tasty black beans and rice and tender Cuban style pork. And my cranberry sauce is the best ever this year. The pecans and raisins and orange zest made for a delicious tartness.
After all this food, I’m going to need some exercise. Is there any music in this joint?
A live band would be awesome.
Peedin got in before me. David Lee Roth would be good too.
I’ll bring my family’s sweet potato casserole with brown sugar, raisins, pecans, and miniature marshmallows.
Happy Thanksgiving everybody!
As a companion to this, I will bring grilled, bacon-wrapped dates stuffed with a slice of pickled jalapeno. Yum!
Happy Thanksgiving to all!
Oh, look, there’s the security for the event. Look who’ve they hired…
Mariska Hargitay, Ice-T, Richard Belzer, Dann Florek, Sean Murphy, Pauley Perrette, Steven Seagall, and Chuck Norris, all properly briefed and all admired by the guests.
Dougie Monty arrives, with a jug of pineapple juice and a large container of Waldorf salad. He finds a place to sit, and greets cordially several Dopers with whom he had a long discussion on The BBQ Pit recently. They respond in kind. Among the waitresses are Dolly Parton and Britney Spears, who tell him and others about…
Rachael Ray’s and Paula Deen’s secret love affair, and since they are also two of the chefs for today, how we might not want to look in the kitchen to see what’s going on. Meanwhile, who do we have serving as parking valets but…
Miley Cyrus and her father. It’s the only gig they can get now. They will get a meal out of it though. Actually, they’re doing a pretty good job. I’m back from checking out my car. A couple of musicians are setting up inside. I can’t believe it’s…
Richard Cheese and Weird Al Yankovic!
Well, I suppose there are polka fans among the Dopers. Hey, who has Richard Belzer just knocked to the ground?
The person’s name is withheld, but he is in the news again, this time for assault; and he is in police custody, or supposed to be. Belzer recognizes him from his picture in the paper, and he and Ice-T hold him for the local police, who arrest him as a fugitive.
Meanwhile, Frankie Yakovic and his namesake Weird Al are playing to the guests–old sentimental ballads, believe it or not. Several of the more musically-inclined Dopers offer to play some of the instruments on stage, and the Yankovics oblige. This includes…