with multiple degrees in various martial arts. I am a human weapon! I work with the homeless on weekends, and set aside Tuesday evenings to be a mentor to disadvantaged children.
Regardless of those persistent rumors, I did not develop the small pox vaccine, or invented cell phones. Please stop repeating these rumors.
Stop being modest Mighty Girl, you did all that and more! You didn’t even say anything about you and your intelligent atomic scooter “Osiris” fighting crime after the sun goes down.
See, I was a Navy Seal, but the Marines wanted me more. So I’m both. I can’t tell you what my unit in the Marines is called 'cause it’s too secret. You don’t have the clearance.
Might want to wait and see what happens on appeal there, Sensei Master Chief. 
There is no appeal. I forgot to tell you. I AM THE LAW!!
I met Chuck Norris once and the double dose of our testosterone was so intense all the women within 10 yards of us grew a douchey little chin beard.
I’m a 10th Dan Black Belt in a Martial Art so secret that even the President of the United States lacks the clearance to know it’s name.
I’m a highly decorated war hero in an off-world war against an alien race. Of course all of that is secret, so no one knows about it.
I’ve won 47 Congressional Medals of Honor, but they’re all so secret that even Congress wasn’t told about them.
In fact, all of this is so highly secret and sensitive, that everyone who ever reads this post will be tracked down and have their memory erased using that secret alien technology.
Chuck Norris has ME on speed dial in case he comes across something he can’t handle.
I’m just a mere leopard seal.
Anybody know if Chimera will be posting to this thread?
I can’t comment on the strength of the judge’s constitutional argument, or on the likelihood that his decision will be overturned on appeal, but as a general principle, i like his ruling.
I’ve argued before that this sort of lie, while stupid and deserving of scorn and ridicule, should not be subject to criminalization. If someone claims to be a veteran in order to defraud the government of benefits, or something similar, the person should be charged under the relevant laws. But simply lying about yourself in order to impress other people? Douchebags do that all the time, and it shouldn’t be illegal.
I AM highly decorated!
I’m wearing tinsel, popcorn strings, glass balls, and a few Hallmark keepsake ornaments.
Well, actually, i can comment, because i’m a highly-regarded constitutional lawyer who has argued in front of the Supreme Court.
But i’m not going to, because you can’t afford my rates.
If it’s unconstitutional under [civilian] law, can we use military law instead? They don’ take no shit from nobody!
I’m catching up. I won three last week. But they’re so secret even I’m not allowed to know what I did to earn them.
I’m a time lord.
Me too! I won several of my medals next week.
The truth is…
I am Iron Man.
I graduated HIGH SCHOOL!
Top 80% of my class too!
Hah… so there.
And my wife is Morgan Fairchild… who I have seen naked.
I am the World’s Most Humble Person three years running. Not that I’m bragging or anything.