The eldest Stepdaughter-to-be has said repeatedly that she needs to learn how to drive, so that she can go get a job, but she never does anything about it. She got her learner’s permit last year, right after she turned 23.
Ooooh we did that a couple of weekends ago. We had a discount coupon, and bought stuff like that. (ceiling fan, kitchen chand). I’d recommend getting a dimmer switch for the light fixture, 'cause it’s just so jake to be able to adjust the light level. But that’s just me.
I got a new keyboard holder yesterday at my desk. I think I hate it, though. I can’t get it adjusted right anymore.
Isn’t okra the stuff that hogs won’t eat unless there’s no dirt left?
Congrats on the fireman job, VBob. We don’t have any volunteer fire departments up this way, but I had always planned on joining up if’n I ever moved back to Pittsburgh.
Do not dis the Pod of God, for verily thou shalt bring down His wrath upon thineself. Or at the very leastest, thou shalt findest there will be no milk for thine cereal in the morning or thine obnoxious neighbor wilt come into the house of thine abode and drinkest thine last beer. Thou are forewarned. Now goest thou and makest a sacrifice from the very tenderest pods thou shalt find. Thou shalt friest the pods in the oil of the peanut and setteth them before the bear that is of the swamp who shalt pronounce absolution upon you.
Verily the switch which dimmest lights is a thing that is right and good and pleasing to the eyes of the resident f-aaaaaa-bu-lous bear of the gay persuasion who doth pronounce right and just those things of good taste.
Bobbio much pleasure is found in thy jokes. Therefore, thou art exalted amongst the kids of the coolness for thine ability to make <snerkiness> appear.
Morning, all. Well, I’m sorry to report the okra was tough and stringy. We could barely eat it. Heck, I could barely cut the stuff! That’s the way it is with a garden, though–you never know. Order in the Summer Eating continuum was restored, however, with the munching of high-grade corn on the cob. The maters were yummy as well. Tonight we have squash and zucchini, and barbecue. Extracurriculars were postponed, also, for a coupla reasons, neither of which I’ll divulge. 
You Waffle House lovers: envy me. Did I tell you they came to my workplace last week and served everyone breakfast? We have an annual Employee Appreciation Week, and this is part of it.
<shudder> Brown sugar on Cream of Wheat? :eek: That’s nearly as bad as sweet grits. I had no idea they were so regional, until a couple years ago, when an internet friend from the Pacific Northwest had no idea what I was talking about. I sent her some. They aren’t even available in stores where she lives!
Interesting Fact of the Day: Did you know that the first flavored chewing gum was created by a Kentuckian? In the late1870s, Louisville pharmacist John Colgan introduced his “Taffy Tolu,” the first produced but not patented flavored chewing gum. Colgan used balsam of tolu, a fragrant, medicinal herb used to flavor cough syrups, to sweeten his chewing gum. His creation was so successful that Colgan sold his pharmacy in order to produce it full-time. In fact, Taffy Tolu became one of the most extensively marketed Louisville-made products at the end of the 19th century. Colgan’s Taffy Tolu Chewing Gum became an international sensation after it was sold at the famous 1893 Worlds Fair in Chicago.
Well, I’m 50/50 with the bear. Guess it could be worse.
I just got an email from someone in Nigeria who wants to buy some equipment we sell. Could this be a new type of internet scam?
Yea verily thou walkest the line of thin. 
Do you have to deposit 5K into an account? Are they offering you a diamond mine in exchange for the equipment? I’m trying to picture a Nigeria equipment buying scam. I’m having a hard time. I guess that’s cause I’m such an honest soul.
That one’s easy. They’ll order a couple of classified Electric Dog Polishers, and send Sean a rubber certified check for 120% of the purchase price. He’s supposed to return the overage to them…
I like grits. They are nummy with fried eggs and bacon. But home fries are better. I’m just sayin…
Mater sammiches are the food of the gods. Mayo and salt are an absolute must! Know what else is good on em? A slice of American cheese. No, really!
Why is swampy channeling the old testament?
fcm, I expect you will get some rain from Ernesto. You’re welcome.
Today is my Friday! I am taking a vacation day sos I can have a four-day holiday weekend. My older sis and her husband are comng in from Texas to see the grumpuses and I expect they will join in on the secret celebration that The Princess[sup]TM[/sup] has planned for my birfday on Sattidy. Imma gonna be 39.
Bolding mine.
Yea verily, and “The Dukes of Hazard” beeth a Shakespearean play about French royalty. 
'Mater sammiches are supposed to be made with Miracle Whip, not mayo. Miracle Whip is another one of those foods of the gods… Maters, Miracle Whip, and Mrs Baird’s white bread.
Man, I’m hungry…
Good morning everyone. Today I am tired. Why am I tired? Because I was up late writing today’s puns. I just wanted you all to know how I bust my buns so you can have a little quality puntime.
Most of what I had to do yesterday was accomplished. I even got to hang out with a friend from high school last night, so that was fun. But I haven’t yet seen Little Miss Sunshine. Hopefully that will happen tonight.
clears throat
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PUGGY!!!
That pun is ruff. What’d you do that fur?
Too bad for this guy, in Nigeria, that we get paid up front for 100% of the bill plus expected shipping charges before we even order the stuff from our suppliers to fill the order. I can’t see how we can be scammed, but I best not get too cocky about it.
Spats good puns. They really made me laugh. You should keep posting them.
Eww, no. Miracle Whip is right up there with grits.
Mayo (preferably Hellmans) is food of the gods, Miracle Whip is gross.
'Mater sammiches are best when made with big juicy beefsteak 'maters, lots of fresh ground pepper, a slice or two of Vidalia onion, and must be eaten over the sink. I prefer mine on toast, but that’s a personal thing.
I’m hungry, too.
wwwwwwwwwwWWWWWHOOOOSHHHHHhhhhhhhhhh
dirve-by
catch y’all later
Miracle Whip?
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww
No, thanks. You can have mine. Seriously, I’m not hungry.
What was that fcm said…sumpin about BITE ME!!
Hey, we just had a bat rescue here at my office. A leetle teeeny fuzzy bat was hanging up near the ceiling in the hallway. Poor thing musta flown in last night when somebody had the smokin porch door propped open. Anyhoo, the building guy called animal control and they came with some big old padded gloves and scooped him up. (I was larfing at all the squeally ladies who were skeered of him.)
I’m with Pugs --what is up with the Old Testament stuff?
I just finished reading Pilgrim’s Progress for class–don’t make me live it over.
Many Happy Returns of the Day, Pugster
And hazard is a French card game (or was-back in the Regency).
I just wrote a paper this morning–now I think I’ll paint a door. Tomorrow is work (bleh)–nurse work, not page work.
I don’t think there are enough minutes in the day for my needs, anymore. Could someone fix that for me? Thanks.
Happy birthday, puggy!
Today is my Friday, because the firm realized they were way, way behind on vacation days in our industry. So we get 4 day weekends over the 4th of July and Labor Day. And we got 4 floating “summer” holidays. We’re keeping our fingers crossed that they will close the week between Christmas and New Year’s this year, since most of our clients and all of our competitors are closed then.
I spoke with my supervisor last night and feel much better, so I it must have been the right thing to do.
Happy birthday, Puggy!
And ewwww, not Miracle Whip, or even Hellman’s – gotta be Duke’s mayo! THAT is the food of the gods, y’all!
And okra is at its very best – well, its second very best because its very very very best is in heavenly gumbo – when it’s very lightly dipped in cornmeal and fried. Like my grandmother used to fix. Her okra was almost – but not quite – even better than her pumpkin bread. That is my Hallowed Family Recipe, her pumpkin bread. There’s simply nothing else like it.
Really good grits are just amazing. Unfortunately, having had really good grits, I can no longer even stand to look at the instant variety, which, yea verily, are an abomination before the Lord! Thus sayeth MamaT. Years ago, my mom, who detests grits – she grew up in Iowa and her mom made hominy all the time, so I don’t know what her problem with grits is – was living in Chicago and picked up a box of instant grits as a joke for a neighbor with two adorable little girls. To the girls’ mom’s horror, the kids loved the grits, and she then had to fix them for them constantly. Hee!
We did a lot of camping when I was a kid and always had Cream o’ Wheat for breakfast, along with lots of other stuff. Cream o’ Wheat cooked over a camping stove, with a healthy dollop of brown sugar? Heavenly! But of course grits can only have salt, pepper, butter, and maybe cheese added; anything else is also an abomination before the Lord.
I’ve been avoiding work for the last hour, but alas, it is yelling at me too get back to it, so I guess I hafta. But I don’t wanna! Waah!