Happy birthday, Puggy. I don’t care how many anniversaries of your 39th BD you’ve had, you still get a hubba hubba from me…
I love it when the Mayo vs. Miracle Whip Wars begin.
Here’s an idea that will make half of you retch, and the other half strokes your gotees and go, “hm, that sounds culinarily intriguing.” And that idea is, put mayonaisse on your blackeye peas.
Go on, do it. You’ll thank me later.
Happy birthday, Mistress Pugmeister!!! 
just stopped in to say
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PUGSY!!!
ok - so I borrowed Spats’ coding - sue me 
Okay, who are you and what have you done with the real Sean? 
I was taught that it is impolite to wish a lady happy birthday before the actual day, so I shall refrain until Saturday bein’ as I am a proper gentleman. I am. I keep my elbows off the table, sit up straight, always use a napkin to wipe my mouth and never ever talk with my mouth full. That’s proper.
Today is New Year’s Eve. Yep. Tomorrow is the start of our new fiscal year. To celebrate, we are taking inventory tomorrow. Woo and Hoo. Wanna take bets on whether or not a manual count will match the alleged count on the spreadsheets? :dubious: Also, I need to start billing. I hate billing. Oh and year end closeout, but a lot of that’s already done cause I already knew that there’d be no orders for some stuff, so that got closed out already.
Yea verily, the bear of the swamp shalt partake of strong drink when inventory doth end.
Here’s sump’n especially for Rigs.
This miry slough is such a place as cannot be mended: it is the descent whither the scum and filth that attends conviction for sin doth continually run, and therefore it is called the Slough of Despond.
Enjoy!
I think Swampy has been bitten by the Coberst bug…
Not only is Ernesto expected, we’ve got flash flood warnings thru tomorrow night. Not us personally - but our county. We live on a hill, so if we get flooded, the animals will be boarding 2 by 2.
My Friday also! So this was a 4 day week, followed by a 4-day weekend, followed by another 4-day week. Yay! Gonna rotiss a chicken for dinner tonight. Beyond that, not a lot of plans.
Nonsense! I never wax philosophical. I never wax my kitchen floor either.
piss on allayouse with tomorrow off! grrrr!
makes note not to tell anyrose that he’s off until next Friday…
We could discuss declawing cats instead, if you like. Or circumcision.
::: retches quietly in the corner :::
What a waste of good mayo.
<hurls knives at swampus >
I sooo wanted the Damsel of Discretion to be named Monica or similiar, but noooo…she was a chaste and solemn chick.
Lord, but that book made me want to go out and Sin Forevermore!
I painted three doors today–yay me! Now I need to buy the paint for the dining room and do that and we will be 95% done with house [del]shit[/del] for the year! (the rest is cleaning and sorting and throwing/giving away).
Envy me.
I loathe both okra AND mayo–so there!
Thank you all for your advance birthday wishes (does that mean I ain’t no lady?? ) and I look forward to my birthday wishes being sung to me by a true suthron gent, too.
::mini rant:: So today is payday. Some of you may remember I had my glowing but very late review complete with retro cost of living increase a couple weeks ago. I open my check and on the line for my retro pay is…one month’s worth. WTF?? Hello! My anniversary date is in March! So I stomp down to Human Resources and splain very nicely that my anniversary date is in March not the date of my last year’s very late review. I get the old deer-in-the-headlights look, they question my sanity, but when they look in my files…yup…I’m right. :rolleyes: I’ve only been working here for sixteen years…you’d think I’ know. So now I gotta wait two more weeks to see if they got it straight. ::end mini rant:: I feel so much better. Carry on.
nph! I got a very good review last year, but because I’m making more than the cap for my tier, I got no monetary increase - I fear the same will happen this year, because they have not yet revamped the company wide pay structure
I got a couple of nagging emails today telling me that while a self-assessment isn’t mandatory for my mid-term evaluation, it’s HIGHLY RECOMMENDED. Then the sender of the email came down to my cubicle to explain that while she didn’t mean to nag me, submitting a self-assessment was HIGHLY RECOMMENDED because the deputy department head reviews them all. Um, right. There are a couple hundred people in this department, and I’m to believe she reads them all? She doesn’t even know who I am!!
So I wrote a self-assessment. It was pretty bitter, mostly because the two big jobs I’ve worked in the last 4 months have been mostly blown off. So what do I say? I did a good job on these two things, but my boss couldn’t be bothered to review the work or assign the critical team member that I needed. :rolleyes:
I haven’t submitted it yet. I probably shouldn’t. We’ll see how I feel when I get back to work. I may have a bit of an attitude problem, ya think??
You say “attitude problem”, I say “allergy to buttkissing”…
I HATE self assessments. I’m either too critical of myself, or not harsh enough. Never in my 22 years in the professional workplace have I ever nailed myself exactly.
Here’s a chance to forget all that crap…
**7 reasons not to mess with children. **
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, “When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah”.
The teacher asked, “What if Jonah went to hell?”
The little girl replied, “Then you ask him”.
+++
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, “I’m drawing God.”
The teacher paused and said, “But no one knows what God looks like.”
Without looking up from her drawing, the girl: replied, “They will in a minute.”
+++
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to “honor” thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?”
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, “Thou shall not kill.”
+++
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?”
Her mother replied, “Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.”
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?”
+++
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, "There’s Jennifer, she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘That’s Michael, He’s a doctor.’
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, “And there’s the teacher, she’s dead.”
+++
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, “Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.”
“Yes,” the class said.
“Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn’t run into my feet?”
A little fellow shouted,
“Cause your feet ain’t empty.”
+++
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
“Take only ONE. God is watching.”
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
Ultrafast driveby… Hi!
Hey, rigs, what does it mean to work as a page in a library? (I’m assuming it doesn’t involve crawling into books…? 
)
And in case I don’t get in here on Saturday (weekend promises to be wild and crazy):
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PUGGY!!!
One of the headlines in today’s paper talked about kids who weren’t dropped off at the right stops (school started here yesterday). Guess who I thought of? I think we need you here, MBG! Hope you had a great first day of school and all the kids got to and from the right places at the right times.
I made myself some lemon chicken soup for dinner. It is yummy.
Off to clean stuff.
GT
quote=Bobbio]A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
[/quote]
BWAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAHAAA!!! Now that’s a kid I could like.
Anybody [del]been suckered[/del] volunteered for next week yet? If not, I’ll step up and take the challenge. I don’t know why cause I have no exciting adventures but one never knows what’s sittin’ up there in the recesses of my brain just waiting on a chance to be immortalized as a MMP OP.
Well, besides being relatively new to this here MMP thingie, I’m going to be incommunicado Monday morning (in Houston for Convergence (miles and miles of beautiful chubby gay manflesh)) so I wouldn’t be able to do it even if I had the talent!