The Straight Dope Bartender's Guide

Your favorite bartender is naming a cocktail for you. What is it like, and what are the ingredients?

The Chrome Spot:

It’s bitter, sweet, mysterious, and sticky.

1-1/2 oz espresso (yay!)
2 oz whisky
muddled fruit
1/2 cup karo syrup (the sticky part, of course)

Eat with a spoon.

Double-TroubleAgain

in a tall mug:
2 packets hot chocolate mix
1-2 shots captain morgain spiced
cinnamon to taste
spoonful of irish cream coffee mate
hot water enough to make it all liquid
mini marshmallows on top
(Chocolate and Rum–definitely double-trouble! :eek: This recipe is my own creation and it is damned good, but rich and sweet and just perfect for a desert drink on a cold winter evening.)

The Headshok:

  • One 1-1/2 oz. shot of Cuervo Gold
  • Lime, salt, and chaser optional, but frowned upon

Repeat every ten minutes for an hour, afterwards as necessary.
Followed the next morning with 1/2 gallon of gatorade and prayer.

The MsRobyn:

Cold milk
Hershey’s syrup to taste
Malted milk to taste

Throw all ingredients into a blender and whomp the heck out of it, till all ingredients are blended.

Yum!

Robin

The Ukulele Ike

3 oz. Tanqueray or Beefeater’s gin
splash of dry Vermouth

Combine ingredients and shake with ice. Strain into a well-chilled cocktail glass and garnish with a single stuffed olive.

…you know, I always get the damnedest looks from bartenders when I tell 'em how to make this for me.

Nooooooooo!

Okay, mine’ll be cloudy, and have little flecks of ice in it. But it’ll be colder than yours. The frosty gin will sting like a dogwhip.

And whaddaya gonna DO with that thing, manny, admire it or drink it?

Blasted
drink-
1/8 Sugar
1/4 Ice 101
1/4 Bacardi 151
1/8 Lime juice
1/4 Crannberry juice

chilled!!

This is one of my creations, this drink will absolutley put you on your ass, after a couple of them.

And it comes with a warning.
WARNING
Light Weights Need To Sip It

The best maragita–very simple recipe–very cheap.

One can frozen limeade
One limeade can of tequila
one half limeade can of trple sec
two cans of water

Great!

does anyone have a recipe for watermelons? they used to serve them on Rush street after you paid your cover. I have the ingredients, but I can’t find one of them anymore. They contained vodka, triple sec, strawberry liquer (can find it anymore) and orange juice. Tasts like candy but knocks yo on your ass. My son was conceived because of this drink.

No Pride Night-

-One large container
-Several cans concentrated fruit juices
-Large amount of fruit
-6-8 friends who each provide a bottle of some type of alcohol

Mix well.
Add water to dilute.

Important: Make sure that the friends present will forgive you for any actions committed that night.

TwistofFate

1 shot Archer’s Peach Schnapps
1 shot Stollichnycha Vodka
1 shot blackcurrant
add cider (preferably Bulmers, or Magners if you’re outside Ireland) to fill a glass with crushed ice.

And for the shameless, make it 3 shots of each and put it in a pint glass. After two pints of this mixture, I guarenteed you’ll be Twisted.

Absoul, this is what we used to call a “bucket party.” I got horribly, horribly sick at one of those.

Ike-
The Plnnr is almost identical except you put the vermouth over the ice first, then dump it back out, and top off with gin. Shake it, stir it, I don’t care. Also, hold the trash - I don’t like fruits or vegetables mixed with my Plnnrs.

Aha! I used to make cocktails.

The Redboss

5 parts good vodka (or good gin)
1 part campari
3 shakes angostura bitters

Over ice. Vary the proportions (if desired) until you get a pretty colour.

Good in the afternoon, provided you didn’t have definite plans for the evening.

Redgulp!

The Very Loaded Dog:
1 bottle Tanqueray
Dry Vermouth

Remove cap from the gin bottle, and top up the little gap with Vermouth. Replace lid, and bung the bottle into the freezer. Always have one of these torpedoes handy, especially when Doping.

The Jane D’oh!

One bottle of vodka (the good stuff and a biiiiig bottle if it’s been a tough week.)
Water
Ice
Twist of Lemon

Pour vodka into 16 oz tumbler with a little ice and a shot of water. Garnish with a lemon twist.

Enjoy!

My own recipie, for special events only:

Miller Lite (also works with Lone Star)
Lime

Viola! Now, it tastes like cheap Mexican beer! Yum, yum! Your guests will never know…

The Dinsdale
Pick a glass, any glass.
Fill it with ice.
Fill to brim with Tanq (or Booth’s or Burnett’s if on a budget).
If you happen to have a lime, slice off a wedge and toss it in.
Drink.
Repeat until you believe you are being stalked by a giant hedgehog.

here’s on of my favorites - the starburst

1 oz raspberry vodka
1 oz orange vodka
1 oz vanilla vodka
splash of cranberry juice

serve chilled as a single shot or a drink

For AbbySthrnAccent -
Mixed berry juice concentrate run through the blender with ice til slushy, serve half and half with cold sprite.