The Things We Do For Love

Well, I can’t laugh out loud because I don’t want to wake anyone up so I had to share.

It seems this young man was dumped by his girlfriend and he wanted her back. He decided that if he was shot she would come rushing to his side in the hospital and he could have her back. It didn’t work out so well for him.

Having decided that he couldn’t shoot himself because he was a felon and felons can not handle guns he asked his best friend to do the honors. The friend said he couldn’t do that, but instead of being the only other one in this story with good decision making skills, other than the girl, found another guy who would do it in exchange for money or drugs. Then they proceeded to drive around to bars looking for a gun with which to do the deed…

Somehow they came up with a rifle and settled on a location and the hire gunman asked the young lover if he was sure he wanted to be shot. The response was yes, he wanted to be shot twice, the back and the chest. The gunman shot him in the arm, and the young man asked to be shot again at which point the gunman said that he was done.

So anyway, the young man went off to the hospital where the girl never showed up, and of course, because their planning skills were so brilliant, the story fell apart right then and there. Charges were filed fairly quickly.

Another little twist to the story as told by the writer happened while everyone was waiting for the case to go to trial. The friend and the gunman went off to deliver drugs to someone but supposedly switched the promised marijuana to catnip. The deliveree’s complained to the police.

I’d do anything for love (but I won’t do that).

Like walking in the rain and the snow?

When there’s nowhere to go?

And you’re feelin’ like a part of you is dying?

I had an ex one time who contacted a manager at my company and tried (unsuccessfully) to get me fired. The next morning, he called trying to comfort me. He essentially said that he wanted to make my life miserable so he could be the one to comfort me. What a headcase that guy was.

Just heard of a book by Ben Mezrich (the guy who wrote the books that 21 and The Social Network were based on) about a whiz kid who is in a NASA astronaut program, who falls in love with a girl (in three weeks) and decides to steal a safe containing all of the moon rocks from the Apollo missions and then proceeds to nail said girl on the bed with the rocks, thus having “sex on the moon.” He tried to sell the rocks on eBay for $10,000 and was busted by the Feds… and spent seven fucking years in prison (he also ruined some scientists’ life research by unwittingly stealing his notebooks, which were never recovered).

He did the heist with three accomplice women, and protected them and took all the blame. They got probation. And unsurprisingly, the girlfriend dumped him when he was in prison.

That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard of in my life. I have to read this book, and of course watch the forthcoming movie.

“After all, it’s just a compromise”

Next time aim for the fleshy part of the thigh!

Me?

I just keep silent.

Seems to work just fine! :wink: