You stupid, stupid git!! A young woman in my city was having trouble driving her boyfriend’s Hummer and flattened two tires. His response was to haul her out of the car, swear at her, then shoot her in the stomach. She stumbled into the CoGos where this happened saying, “Please help me, sir. I don’t want to die.” Since this happened, she has gotten engaged to the man who shot her.
Here’s a link to the full story.
Sorry, lass. I hate to break it to you, but the way you’re going, you are going to die, and not of old age. He made you get out of the car, berated you, and shot you. This is not a good man. This is a man, who, in my opinion, should have “Do Not Date” tattoed on his forehead in large prominent letters. It would also suit my sense of justice if that Hummer he’s driving is the last one he ever gets. He’s pleaded guilty to the charges and will be going to jail for up to 17 years. From what I’ve read, this isn’t likely to improve his disposition. From what I’ve read of such men, he’s probably already blaming you for it, although I must admit there is some reason for that. He shot you! He pulled out a gun and shot you! You’ve already been terrified you’re going to die because of that. Are you really so desperate and lonely you’re willing to have that happen again?! It can’t be that he’s wonderful. Call me picky, but if a man shoots me or any girlfriend of his during an altercation, not matter how great the provocation, he doesn’t qualify as “wonderful” in my book. Pond scum’s more like it, but pond scum serves a useful purpose. I’m sorry, but if a man physically abuses you in any way, and shooting certainly qualifies as abusing you, you don’t marry him. Instead, you put him far out of your life until and unless he learns to control his temper.
Oh yes, a word to you, young idiot who’s to quick with a gun and your temper. You had something going for you. You’re apparently a talented boxer, “a former International Boxing Federation lightweight champion”. You could have had fame and respect. Instead, you’re just another punk kid with more brawn than brains. You’ve thrown away a shot at a dream a bunch of other people would love to have a chance at. You could have had the city at your feet. (OK, maybe not in a year when the Steelers have a shot at the Super Bowl.) Instead, you are going to jail. Instead, a bunch of people like me, who think it might have been cool to have a boxing champion from Pittsburgh are only going to look at you with contempt. I meant it when I said may that precious Hummer of yours be the last one you get. You tried to kill a woman you presumably love. She deserves better than that. The lowest wretch on this planet deserves better than that, even you. I understand being angry and maybe even, dare I say it, a bit scared. I know the bridge this happened on. I understand being so furious you can’t see straight. That does not and will never in my book excuse pulling out a gun and shooting anyone, whether you love them or not. Sorry, lad, you’re too stupid to date.
Lass, please, do yourself a favor, break the engagement, and leave this guy in the long forgotten past. Better a broken heart than broken bones, and you may be lucky to get off with only broken bones. Do you really want to risk your life on the possibility of him changing? That’s what you’re doing now. I’m a news junkie, addicted to my morning paper. I’ve been known to buy it at the CoGos you stumbled into, bleeding and terrified you’d die. I don’t want to read about your death at this guy’s hands.
And now, if you’ll excuse me, one of the nice guys in this city is due here soon. We’re getting together with a bunch of other nice people, people for whom deliberately hurting someone you love is unthinkable and shooting them goes against everything they know. I’d like to introduce you to them. As I said, you can do better.
With deep regret,
CJ
