I don’t know, Paul, probably death. The BC is out of the country, though. My commander didn’t actually show up either. Called everyday, but face to face? Nada.
I guess its of little matter since I don’t really have time to deal with them. The wifes car is officially totalled. My jeep they say can be repaired for 3k. But USAA has some kind of auto deals with local vendors. So I’m going to trade it in for a new one. Blue book value of my jeep is 21k and they’re selling new ones at 21k. So if they repair it they can probabably resell it for a pretty penny, enough to cover whats left of my original loan, and I can get a new vehicle for lower payments.
I’ll let you all know more later. Right now we have to meet some contractors and start getting bids for reconstructing the house.
First of all, thank God you and your family and kitties are alive and safe. A couple of thoughts, in no particular order.
Take any and all offers for counseling for you and wife. The trauma of the event and the loss of your environment is significant. Face it, work through it. It’ll be healthier for you all, AND will make working on a new home a more positive and less haunting experience.
Respectfully suggest you keep a lot of that bonus $ 26K buried in the bank. In the finest of situations, new construction is sometimes in need of tweaks afterwards. Having a cushion of tens of thousands is pretty rare, and to be appreciated. It might make the difference in the next year or two, to have that tucked away.
Go for two new cars. My god- any vehicle drenched and bent/ crushed can’t very well be made road-worthy.
Prayers to you and your neighbors. Keep us posted. And welcome to CNN !
I don’t think we need cpomseling, but number 2 is soumd advice. We’re getting new cars. The wifes was totalled and my jeep won;t be the same so i am trading it in for a new one. it can be repaired and its trade in value should be enpugh to cover whats left of its loan.
Adding my own ‘holy shit, glad you and the cats are OK’ to the refrain. We spent the night before in Fayetteville en route to Florida and heard that storms were predicted but were well south of there before anything happened, so didn’t know much about it until the next day when we saw the newspapers. We were back through NC yesterday and happened to take surface roads around a traffic jam, from Micro to Kenly (a bit north of Fayetteville, for folks who don’t know NC) and saw a lot of the destruction.
Was thinking of making a donation to the Micro VFD since I saw a sign there saying they had help for tornado victims - can you think of other reasonable targets for donations instead of / as well as?
Oh, hell yes. I don’t know how I missed this thread before.
How incredibly fucked up Jolly Roger, but its a minor miracle you guys all came through okay. I hope disaster relief is helpful enough for you to rebuild your lives without too much intervening pain.
I have to say, tornadoes are probably the one environmental event that scares the crap out of me. For whatever reasons earthquakes don’t perturb me much except in the abstract ( i.e. the shaking doesn’t scare me and I’ve been in a fair few, including Loma Prieta ). But tornadoes, even that weird pre-tornado cale and green/purple skies, make my asshole pucker.
Me too, until our one and only homeowners claim. Our home was significantly damaged by a burst pipe around Christmas, and USAA hasn’t moved an inch on our claim in months. The only repairs so far are the one we paid for out of our own pockets (the repiping)- still no floors, walls, cabinets or furniture. We had to hire our own public adjuster, and only after we complained directly to the CA insurance commissioner did USAA decide to acknowledge three letter and a dozen phone messages.
I don’t understand it- USAA has always been top-notch on our auto policies. I dont understand this at all.
Several of the tornadoes that touched down during that storm had their damage rated at the EF3 level, with Fayetteville suffering damage ranging from EF0-EF3.
An EF3 tornado has winds up to 150 mph and can easily cause enough damage to condemn most single-family dwellings. Additionally most brick homes in the United States are just regular stick-frame houses with a brick facade. Just because the brick on the outside is genuine brick doesn’t mean that is actually what the walls of the home itself are made from.
There are of course some genuine brick, stone, and even concrete block houses in the U.S., but I would imagine if you add them all up they are still vastly outnumbered by stick frame houses.
I do have a friend in hurricane country who has a form of concrete block house he was really big on (it has a specific term I cannot remember), he was telling me about it at one point. They are more likely to survive hurricane force winds, and dispel any images you may have about concrete block houses, they can be made to look just like a normal house from the outside.
My understanding is EF4 and EF5 tornadoes, which can have winds > 200 mph have enough power to push well secured homes entirely off their foundation. At that point your building material won’t matter too much, if the house is pushed off the foundation the structural damage will almost certainly condemn it.
More bad news…Patches, the cta that we thought we lost in the tornado is well, lost. My wife was carrying her in a cat carrier to her car from our friends apartment where we’ve been satying. We have rented an apartment in the same complex until our house is rebuilt. (USAA is paying the rent)The carrier popped open and Patches got out. My wife called me imediately and I ran over there. I managed to catch hold of her for a moment but she was so scared she scratched the hell out of me and ran away. We’ve been sitting outside and searching for her for hours.
Our friend said he’ll wait to see if she comes back to his apartment. He’s left the door cracked so she can just walk in. (He’s a night owl. He’ll sit up all night watching TV…plus, well, he’s that kinda guy that would do anything for you) God, I hope she comes back. Wife is very upset. I’m upset, but I have to hold it together. This is a nightmare. Am I being punished for something? Right now its very hard for me to not be angry at Fate, God, whatever. Its not fair. We lost everything in that tornado. Can’t we get a fucking break?
Sorry to hear about the cat. Everything mounts until you release the stress.
During the flooding 3 years ago me and my brother were so stressed at one point, we were ready to crack. We had a toy boat race after a barely contained blowup. That was a little stress relief for that day. The next day we drove a few hundred miles north to some park we hadn’t been to for years. We walked our asses off. We drove to the northern most point in Wisconsin and saw more stuff we hadn’t seen in forever. We started back home and stopped at a ren faire in the back roads of nowhere. It was closed, but oh well it was an adventure. We stopped in a stick in the mud bar in a tourist town that evening, to get some food. We sat near 3 local drunk barflies for about an hour, that were shall we say the stereotypical Yoopers. A younger Daisy Duke was doing the cooking and running the bar. The Yooper dudes were flirting as best they could as they slurred away at her. It was entertaining to say the least. We got out of there and home about 22:00. The stress levels were down to something we could coop with again. At some point you have to relieve the stress, so do it in a fun way, not a bad way. I know that it seems unreal when you go places and people are doing normal things and nothing is wrong. It’s hard to reconcile that with your life being the exact opposite.
I’m really sorry to hear about the cat! Is there anything you can possibly do to keep an eye on the home-site to see if kitty turns up there?
Also, you say you don’t need counseling, and I don’t believe you’re lying. I just think maybe you’re underestimating how hard all this is hitting you, and as different shit crops up, it’s going to keep on hitting you. You may want to check into the availability of at least talking to someone on a one-time basis.
If I need counseling it’ll be about the cat more than the house at this point. I’ll tell you why, mostly because I need to vent this. I was in our apartment putting together a desk and waiting for the cable-gal to finish, she was in our friends apartment, literally a two minute walk from here getting our things. (our friend was not home at the time). After the cable gal leaves she calls me to get a few things for transport. I go there and she’s not even got them all packed. Now we don’t have that much shit. I could have gone myself and had all of our shit over here in thirty minutes, and thats including the cats. Two trips in the rentacar, thats all it takes. (I got her a new car saturday as hers was totalled in the tornado, I still have the rental)
But I don’t complain I just wait and get the stuff and bring it over here. It was obvious she had been using our friends computer to surf most of the time she was gone. I don’t even mind that. She needed break. Both of us do. But don’t fucking call me to do some stuff until you’re ready when I’m putting a desk together ***for you **and setting up the new computer I got for you **[COLOR=“black”]until you’re really ready. [/COLOR]*My wife isn’t stupid, but she sometimes will make you think otherwise by doing things that at least to me, seem really really dumb. I took Banshee with me when I came back. She tries to carry both Jet Jaguar and Patches in cat carriers to her car at the same time. Thats when the carrier popped open, Jet fell out (but didn’t run) and Patches fell out of the other in the stairwell. So then instead of, you know, grabbing Patches who is in fuckin’ heat (My fault…y’know why? because every freaking time she says I’ll make an appointment to get her fixed she doesn’t fucking do it. I should have just done it So yeah, its my fault for not just realizing the damn cat would be four before she did it) she tries to unlock our friends door first so she can put them back inside. Patches is too curious for own good, fast and still spooked from the tornado. Jet is 11 years old, has already been lost once in his life and now is less likely to run . He won’t even go near a door if you open it anymore.
Needless to say, Jet goes inside. Patches takes off. Thats when she calls me. I run over there. Now I’m already perturbed that she tried to carry them both instead of calling me to help. We see Patches. We even caught her between us in an small alley between buildings. Patches makes a break for it. I don’t know why shes alluva sudden so terrified of us. I grab her but she claws me to death. The wife stands there saying “don’t hurt her”. But every goddamn time one of the cats does this she does that. Stand there and say things like “she’s over there”. Yeah, honey, I can see that. Howabout fucking helping me grab the cat? What am I the fuckin’ Flash? All she had to do was help me keep hold of her for a few seconds. But no, she says “don’t hurt her” from fifteen feet away. Patches runs around the building I tell her to go the opposite way around as we’re not going to outrun her. But if she cuts her off Patches might go to her or at least she’ll see what direction she runs. I come around the corner, no Patches, no wife…for a few moments. Because she fucking WALKED! not ran or jogged.
Now I’m close to blowing up. But I don’t because shes crying about the cat and I don’t want to see her cry. But Jeebus, honey…could you at least move with a little urgency? Could you at least freaking realize the cat is going to act like a cat and go hide? So I spend all evening walking around looking for the cat, not even getting to eat. I don’t get much sleep because Jet Jaguar cried all night looking for Patches. I woke up at 0430 because I’ve got to go back to our friends place hoping Patches will wander back there looking for breakfast. I can’t allow myself to worry about the cat that much because I have too much other shit to do. I can’t even tell her how upset I am by her lack of using a sliver of common sense caused this. Who needs sleep? Its not like i’ve had much of it for 8 days now anyway. grrrrr.
As I said, she’s not stupid, but she baffles me at times. I won’t even go into the fiasco of getting her new car or her worst suggestion ever Saturday “We can save money by getting a modular home built on the lot”. I won’t mention that because when I said no she says “You won’t even consider it?” causing me to use my shut up woman voice and say “No, I won’t. I bought a fucking real house, I’m having a real fucking house built. Why the hell would I want a flimsier house after a tornado? Are you mental? Whats wrong with you?”. Well I didn’t say the part after “tornado”, but I damn sure thought it.
Which pisses me off only because I rarely, if ever get to the point where I say something like that. I’m convinced now that I have to make ALL of the decisions. I just don’t think she can do it anymore.
So maybe you’re right. Maybe I need counseling. I don’t have time for it, but after I can get most of this mess under control I’ll probably fall apart. But I can’t now…if I don’t do this stuff who will?
You know, not everyone needs counseling. It’s not a requirement. It’s like after my sister died and some “helpful” people kept pushing me towards counseling. No, really, I didn’t need it, my family was my support group.
Mention it once, then let the person dealing with the crap decide, because, really, not everyone needs it, even though aftermath keeps hitting him and “keeps on” hitting him. Some people cope very well as they are, without needing an expert.
Yeah the hits keep coming. Now Jet is missing. He didn’t follow me out when I went to look for Patches, but my wife went out to look after I came back. He was in here then. I think he followed her out unless he’s a ninja. Cuz we can’t find him in here.
I’m done. I’m not going through this again. He probably went out looking for Patches. If he finds her and they both come back, great. If not, well, I can’t…I won’t…waste time looking for them. I’lll keep an eye out for them, but I’m done. There are too many important things for me to do this week. I’ve lost enough time, money and everything else. If this is some kind of punishment from on high, hey, you win. I quit. Its obvious that i’m not going to be allowed to have anything. So its over. I’ll keep plugging on because the only thing else that can happen is death, and I just don’t care anymore.
Jolly Roger, just wanted to chime in and say that “cats is weird” - they can react very strangely to new situations. It’s possible that you will find Jet hiding in a closet or other improbable location. Put up a lost poster for Patches, it’s entirely possible that someone will find her and take her in.
Called everyday, but face to face? Nada.
