Expect the Toddler in Chief to throw even more tantrums. Today is his first day without his emotional binky, Hope Hicks.
@maggieNYT (Maggie Haberman) tweeted “Dan Scavino is taking over Hicks’ old office, which she had inherited from Keith Schiller, enshrining the closet-sized space adjacent to the Oval Office as belonging to the president’s emotional binky”
Whoa! Maggie Hackerman actually took a swipe at Trump? I’m shocked.
Shulkin says Trump talked to him on the phone yesterday and didn’t tell him he was going to be fired. He had Kelly tell him, then tweeted about it.
That was a “nice” Trump firing. Kelly told Tillerson he was fired while Tillerson was sitting on the toilet.
Would be nice if someone had the guts to tell Cadet Bone Spurs to do his own damn dirty work.
In person?
Must be a fan of Tyrion.
Yes, I think so: Tillerson Was Reportedly on the Toilet When He Got Canned
He brought them into the 21st century in 1999? Damn, he was good.
Sitting on the toilet sick with travelers diarrhea while traveling around for Trump to undermine his every move.
And if that wasn’t bad enough, Kelly dignified him by not only choosing that time and place, but by personally relaying those details to the press with a chuckle after the fact.
Stay classy Trump admin!
And Tillerson responded; “Shut the door please, I’m pooping.”
In a campaign speech yesterday Trump said, “We started building our wall. I’m so proud of it. And we’ve already started, you saw the pictures yesterday."
This was, of course, a lie. He has zero funding for a wall. He actually tweeted pictures of a border fencing project which started in 2009.
Trump touts construction on older border fence during stop in Ohio
Interestingly, Ivanka didn’t clap for this lie during the speech.
Trump declares April National Sexual Assault Awareness Month. Finally here is a subject Trump is an expert in!
The Shit Can
A play in one act, by Happy Lendervedder
KELLY [pokes head into office restroom, sniffs]: Hey Tilly, wipe yer ass and hit the grass.
Tillerson [lifts head from sweaty palm] Wut?
curtain
Actually, wouldn’t hiring local contractor employees, especially at the laborer level, significantly improve the economy in the short term?
Someone leads the way.
So. Does Tillerson actually shit gold? 
Hey, we are talking about the paragon of clusterfucks. Everyone within it shits gold. At least that is what they have been trying to sell us. Some of us have been difficult, though. They hold up their shiny gold truck for us to admire, but all we seem to see in their hands is turds.
National Self-awareness Month postponed until further notice.
I believe that’s known in the White House as “taking a Trump.”
To be fair, he certainly has made us more aware of sexual assault.