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A Republican may not injure a corporation, or through inaction allow a corporation to come to harm.
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A Republican must obey the orders of the deplorable voter base except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
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A Republican must protect its own reelection as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Laws.
Good one. I bet Asimov would have approved.
I think 2 and 3 should be reversed.
And you forgot the Zeroth Law: A Republican must take whichever course will garner the most money.
I think my order fits better, partly to preserve the parody parallels and partly from the record of Republicans doubling down on nativist/Talibornagain/etc stupidity (Law 2) even when it’s painfully obvious that it’s a losing position politically (Law 3) (e.g. Todd “Legitimate Rape” Akin).
Here is an entertaining article regarding whatz coming down the road (like beginning next week) with the EPA.
“One transition official has publicly praised the benefits of increasing carbon dioxide.” :smack:
“Our citizens will have the strongest lungs on the planet from having to work harder just to get enough oxygen! It’s like a 24/7 crossfit for your lungs!”
Remember that lying sack-o-shit Monica Crowley? She now says shewas a victim after it was discovered she plagiarized thousands of words.
“…Donald Trump is an alien organism…” :eek: 
So she just plagiarized from the screenplay of the movie Alien!
Christ!!! :smack: I guess she just can’t help it.
I think this might be the first time I’ve seen ‘pathogenic’ as a defense of someone.
This is ALL that matters to House Republicans. Nothing else about Trump, his so-called policies, his behavior, his tweets, his lies-- nothing matters except
“House Republicans set fundraising record in President Trump’s first full month”
http://wapo.st/2nciDAW
Even if it’s a case of post hoc, ergo propter hoc. Doesn’t matter. Right now he’s the gander that’s shitting golden eggs.
they live!!!
If you were plotting how to weaken the USA from within, wouldn’t slashing the State Department (relations with other nations) and the Coast Guard (interdiction) be two top priorities?
One of Trump’s Labor Department appointees, who doesn’t need Congressional approval, is a recent high school graduate.
It appears that you ultraliberal leftists still can’t get over the fact that President Trump is president, and he is indeed doing a great job with his conservative agenda, as well as carrying out everything he said he would do.
So far, Trump has:
*Repealed an Obama-era coal stream rule that would have resulted in the loss of jobs for tens of thousands of coal workers, in addition to the thousands already out of work
*Signed an executive order reinstating the Mexico City Policy, which bans the funding of international health organizations that perform or promote the abortions of unborn children
*Nominated the excellent Neil Gorsuch, a solid conservative jurist who will uphold the Constitution’s original meaning as written, to replace the late, great Antonin Scalia.
*Presided over record-breaking stock market rallies, which have been coined the “Trump rallies”.
*Given the ICE free reign to crack down on illegal aliens, particularly the criminal ones. Specifically, he unleashed them and gave them more power to apprehend aliens who were given a free pass simply because they hadn’t committed any violent crimes yet. The results are showing. In mid-February, the ICE rounded up 700 illegal aliens alone, 75 percent of whom had criminal records (they’re not all warm and fuzzy, as the Left would have us believe).
*coordinating the investing of billions of dollars into the United States with companies such as General Motors, Softbank Lockheed, etc. which will create tens of thousands of jobs.
*Repealed a ridiculous last-day rule passed by the Obama administration which banned wildlife hunters from using lead bullets, despite the fact that it would cause thousands to stop hunting because of the high price of non-lead ammo, and the fact that scientific studies don’t show any real long-term harm to wildlife from using them when hunting.
Last but not least, as was reported yesterday by Homeland Security Secretary John Kelly, the number of illegal southern border crossings decreased by a whopping 40% in February—a stunning achievement.
I confess: I am a conservative Republican, I voted for Trump, and I am absolutely satisfied by what I see so far, and I am overjoyed by what the next four years will bring. I can tell the majority of straightdope people are liberals, and I respect their beliefs, but not their distortions of Trump. 
Indeed, those Conservative Republicans are really enthused about Trumpcare.
I seem to remember when Conservatives would have disapproved of a President with ties to a foreign government. One given to senile ravings. But Wm F Buckley is long gone…
Leon Panetta, one of them “ultraliberal leftists”, appeared on the CBS Evening News tonight. In essence, he was asked if Trump was nuts. In essence, he said “yes.”
Supporting science and opposing torture are ultraliberal leftist positions now, are they?
As you damn well know, Trump has said that the Obamacare Replacement bill is open to “review and negotiation.” As well it should be.
I believe Paul Ryan really screwed the pooch on this one, although I have high respect for him. It’s bad because in its current form it keeps the Obamacare expansion, doesn’t allow selling of healthcare across state lines, etc. But the process isn’t done yet.
The final product will be much better; the Freedom Caucus in the House and Rand Paul and Mike Lee in the Senate are very principled conservatives and won’t allow this Obamacare-Lite to pass. 
I believe in climate change, and I believe the Bush administration’s torture programs (euphemistically called enhanced interrogation) were wrong. I just don’t think that we should pass high, burdensome taxes and regulations, to deal with climate change, regulations and taxes that will have a ruinous effect on the business community, particularly coal country and all its hardworkers.
Despite what the Left would have you believe, conservative Republicans like myself do believe the climate is changing; we just don’t believe that to deal with it we should destroy the livelihoods of tens of thousands of hardworking coal workers to do it, workers who produce material that is so vital to everyday Americans’ lives. If a carbon tax was passed, thousands of jobs in the coal industry would fizzle, some coal plants would shut down, etc.