The Witz Thread

A young man is introduced by the schadchen (matchmaker) to the family of his prospective wife. The schadchen advises him: “It’s important that you make a really good impression. Talk about family matters first, then talk about love, and finish with some philosophy”.
The young man listens carefully. Over dinner, he asks the young lady:
“Miss Kohn, do you by any chance have a brother?”.
“No”, she says. That concludes the familiymatters. Love, next.
“Miss Kohn, do you love macaroni?”
“Yes”, says the bride to be. That concludes love. Now for the hard part: philosophy.
“Miss Kohn, what do you think: if you had a brother - would he love macaroni ?”


An engineer, on an official mission, has stayed in a Galician town for a few weeks. During his stay, he orders a pair of trousers from the local Jewish tailor. The trousers aren’t ready at the appointed time, and the engineer leaves town.
Seven years later, while he passes through the town again, the tailor shows up to deliver the pants!
Engineer: “Our Lord created the entire world in just seven days - and it took you seven years to finish a pair of pants ?!”
The tailor tenderly spreads out the pants before him and says: "Yes, but take a good look at the world - and then look at these pants again! "

I’d love to meet a tailor that good, sigh

Cute, but what is Witz?

The word Witz is Yiddish for “joke”. Jewish humor has the same reputation as French cooking. French cooking, originating from local circumstances, is now world renowned. Likewise, Yiddish humor originated in 1850-2000, in Eastern Europe, and in tragic circumstances, as the Jews were mostly oppressed cultural outsiders. But the humour of the Witz is widely appreciated, in Europe as well as the US. It’s just that few people know what is so Yiddish about this kind of humor.

Here is a short essay to get started on the Witz.

Reminds me of the seemingly-unintentional joke in the film “Fiddler on the Roof.” A beggar asks Tevye for money, and he puts a kopek in his palm. The beggar says,“Last week, you gave me two kopeks.” Tevye replies, “I had a bad week.” To which the beggar counters, “Just because you had a bad week, why should I suffer.” Chutzpah squared, says I.

You had one too many http://'s in there, this link should work. :slight_smile: