The Worst Local News Tarnsitions

We’ve all seen them, whether it’s upbeat to tragic :“Sadly, the people of Darfur aren’t nearly as lucky as Little Miss Watermelon Festival…” or tragic to upbeat: “But their were plenty of survivors at last weekends county fair!” What transitions have you seen that were so bad that they made you laugh, even if you probably shouldn’t?

The inspiration for this was one I saw today. The local station was doing a human interest story on the children targeted music group The Wiggles and their upcoming concert date. It was immediately followed by “Next, how to explain your divorce to your kids” I couldn’t help but picture one of the Wiggles telling the audience, “Want to sing a song, kids? This one’s called Because the Sluts Been Cheating on Me

In Charleston, SC, I heard one that made me go :smack:

They were reporting on a windstorm, which had caused a lot of damage around town, and afterward Perky McNewsreader chirped the following, as a lead-in to a newstory about cutting down on unsolicitied mail offers:

“While the wind is whipping up a tizzy outside, junk mail is whipping up a tizzy in your mailbox!”

Junk mail does not whip up tizzies. Junk mail just sits there in your mailbox and makes you feel all bloated and awful.

BTW, what’s a tarnsition? That what they call 'em down South?

Yeah, it’s the spam that whips up tizzies. Or at least offers to.

There used to be a sketch comedy show in Seattle called Almost Live[sup]*[/sup]. One of the recurring bits was “Uncle Fran’s Musical Forest”, a kids’ show host that pretty much fits your description.

“Hi, kids, today I’m going to sing a song about my girlfriend, and all others of her kind.”

*Little girls are made of sugar and spice,
so how come when they grow up they turn into
bitches on wheels?

Bitches on wheels,
Bitches on wheels,
Bitches on wheels,
Bitches on wheels…*
It was the launching pad, so to speak, for Bill Nye’s showbiz career. Picture him doing Science Guy stuff for grown-ups. It was great.

Not a transition but a sequence error.

Years ago there was a Double mint gum commercial on the TV - the old double your pleasure, double your fun music and voice-over.

Right after that came a news promo spot where the local talking head news lady says, “Double homicide - Details tonight at 10.”

Oh, I’ve done that…run an ad for a plus-size women’s clothing shop, then a spot for a gym. :smack:

You also won’t normally see cars running back to back with beer or liquor ads.

[hijack]That reminds me of the time when the ad right before In Living Color was for Colt 45 (works every time?) – and then the program started off with a spoof commercial parodying that very same commercial! I thought there was a technical glitch or something at first.

There was a guy in the Bay Area that worked for a talk show station. No matter what the previous story was during the news, he’d try to tie it in to the next segment. A woman who was carrying multiple babies delivered early, and some of the babies were stillborn (IIRC).

“And … hoping that today’s market isn’t stillborn, here’s Joe Blow bringing you the stock market report…”.

Actually, I think it’s "tarnation ", as in, “What in tarnation is going on?”

Was anyone else reminded of that segment on The Soup, called Danzitions, where they used to make fun of the Tony Danza Show. He had the worst transitions, usually a pause, then a sad face, then on to the next topic…

Danzitions

Speaking of which, Joel McHale also got his start on Almost Live.