I’m in the same boat as panache45. I also stopped watching local news years ago and am becoming more and more annoyed with CNN - though I only halfway pay attention to it as background noise while I work.
You know what annoys me the most about it? Some of the things they say constantly. Things that they are obviously told to say but I have no idea why.
How about “absolutely”? If you listen carefully you’d think everything they talk about is an absolute. Ever effing time someone leads a subject to a new person they are “absolutely” right. Most questions are answered absolutely.
“Good morning, Bob.” “Absolutely!”
WTF!!??
And what about “our insert name”. The reporter at that scene is yours? Oh, really? You’re not getting live feeds from FOX or MSN?
If you are talking to a Goddam affiliate you always say so, and there is no reason you’d be talking to anyone from another network. So of course they are yours, you obtuse bastards!
I know there’s a third thing, but I’m frothing at the mouth already and can’t remember it through the din.
I pitted this four years ago, but it still holds true. “Finally, a break from the heat wave. Details on Fox 25 news at 10.”
That day it was in the low 70s. The day before was in the 60s. Every day before that for past five months was bitter fucking cold. Yeah, I really needed a break from the heat wave. It was so oppressive
What disgusts me is the constant need to have puns in the story. I swear, all my local news channels do it. Not just the segue, but all through the whole story! GAH! I love puns, but they completely overdo it. A serious news story should NOT be full of puns!
My beef is the constant teasers. The local bobble heads spend 75% of their time “hinting” about the upcoming news stories and 10% of their time actually telling them.
The puns and cliches annoy me too. Every story about dogs will refer to them as “four-legged friends.” Every story about eggs (e.g., Easter egg hunts) will use the word “egg-cellent” or “egg-stravaganza.” Everytime it rains during an outdoor festival or what not, they say “the rain couldn’t dampen their spirits.”
Seriously. Every time I watch the local news, there’s a comment that follows the format of - “Also, new studies show how <innocuous household object probably made in China> may be <poisoning your dog/causing erectile dysfunction/giving you athlete’s foot>. Tune in at 11 to find out how YOU can protect yourself.”
Whenever I hear this I think of Eddie Izzard’s spiel on lying toasters. “They LIE to us!”
I dislike the pretend rooting for the local teams which will be over once the reporter moves to a new market and I hate the constant joking on the local news. Once in a while might be acceptable, but constant laughter is annoying especially when you can see them tell themselves (straight face): A yong man was killed this afternoon…
I dislike the pretend rooting for the local teams which will be over once the reporter moves to a new market and I hate the constant joking on the local news. Once in a while might be acceptable, but constant laughter is annoying especially when you can see them tell themselves (straight face): A young man was killed this afternoon…
“John, I’m standing in front of [stretch of highway with cars passing normally, darkened courthouse, etc.], which you can see is quiet right now, but which only eighteen hours ago was the scene of…”
A while back, I saw something like this in a clip on YouTube (which, sadly, I cannot find). The newsbimbo was chuckling through some wacky footage of a squirrel doing something cute but pointless, and finished up with a lame joke and a grin. Then she immediately turned grave as she started the next story, about a horrifying plane crash. You could see her brain getting whiplash at the transition.