Their goose was cooked -- no, that's not right

Weird dead wildlife sighting du jour: Three dead geese in the middle of a busy state highway. It was in a section of said highway where there are lights periodically – and, in fact, it was in an area right where there were not one but two left-turn lanes (with light) for entry into a Target/Barnes & Noble/Bed Bath & Beyond/etc. conglomeration – but a high volume, high speed stretch of road.

How do you kill one goose with a car, let alone three?

  1. Trebuchet
  2. Use the roof-mounted automatic 12-gauge
  3. “Pedal to the metal” when a gaggle of the belligerent birds are loitering on the road–laugh maniacally as your Hummer H2 slams into the slowesxt three of the terrified birds
  4. Give it a bunch of liquor and the keys

Nope, it’s much easier than that Inigo. You just slam on the brakes, and turn the wheel all the way to the right. Drift right across the lane sideways, effectively firing a broadside of Detroit steel at the geese.

One is easy, those damn things dart in front of a car faster than any dog can.But I agree, three you have to be trying to hit.

The Google ads want me to download a canadian goose ringtone to my phone!

We all want you to download a Canadian goose ringtone to your phone.

The strangest dead combo I’ve seen by the side of the road was a deer and a turkey, lying side by side. I mean, what are a deer and turkey doing hanging out together in the first place, much less in the middle of the interstate?

Even stranger was the small cassette deck found nearby playing “Endless Love” over and over again…

Bird Flu has arrived folks…