Actually, they usually call me “Loudmouth Jerk,” but it’s all good. A short while back a thread was started about performing a marriage service, and by a stroke of coincidence, I was asked to perform one at the same time.
And now it’s done! Last weekend, for the first time, I joined together a man and a woman in (holy) matrimony. I’m not going to kid myself and make believe that what I did was holy; for the function I served, I was simply a notary without a stamp and the title “Reverend” in front of my name, courtesy of the Universal Life Church. But everyone seemed well-pleased, so I guess it’s a mitzvah. Here’s a snap of me with the happy couple. Terrible photo – my apologies to the bride and groom, for they appear to be a cartel leader standing next to a trailer queen. No, that’s not their kid; it was rented for the occasion.
Asknott, how’s your situation going? Is the marriage on or off?
I got my okay from the county to perform marriages a few years ago, I used my certificate from the ULC too. The only marriage I have done was for an older couple that wanted to get married without a ceremony. I have been considering offering my services to make some money but I’m not sure if I want to give up my weekends yet. There is a shortage of folks that can marry people where I live, my step daughter ended up using a tattoo artist that wanted to hang around for the reception and offer his tattooing services. The pastor that was going to do her marriage backed out at the last minute when he got a better offer.
Yup, that’s me in the tie. So, Rev if you should see me hanging out in Publix, say the word “felch” really loud – I’ll know there’s a Doper in the house.
At my old job, we all picked out jailhouse nicknames (don’t ask). Mine was “Preacher,” due to my exalted status. I wouldn’t mind kicking villainous ass, though! Just as long as I don’t have to wear a spandex super-suit.
Eh, I’m never at your fancy-ass valet-parking Publix, that’s too rich for my West Boca blood. I shop at Publixes out here by 441, and Albertsons. They’re going get a real floor over the dirt floor real soon now, they promise.
I’ll still say “felch” to anybody I see that looks even remotely like you, though.
Say, what is the plural, anyway? Publixis? Publia? Publii?
FWTW, we sometimes go to the Publix at 441; my wife works at a grocery store on SW 18th (across from Outback – no names mentioned: no spammer, I), and occasionaly we stab westwards to go to gasp Wal-mart.
Ah, I know the place, starts with ‘H’, yes? I used to live close by there, like in the early 90’s, and go to “H’s” because it was so close. It was also the only place that carried Jolt cola, which I loved when I was a raging caffeine addict. Also used to go to the dentist in that plaza, before I started working in Ft. Lauderdale.
