Things I learned on the SDMB this week (and didn't know I asked)

Or, 101 ways to kill time at work

So, after over a year of lurking (and a long-expired guest membership) this thread finally caused me to pony up the $15 membership fee (even though it may no longer be required in the near future). So, this is what I learned this week:

  1. Not only do bears and the Pope shit in the woods, so does lieu
  2. The resultant mess when a “high velocity hollow point hit[s] a pile of poo” isn’t pretty, and causes deer to change species.
  3. I want to PARTY with Master Wang-Ka. Or maybe not. It may be dangerous.
  4. I don’t think I want to be in the same room with** tiny ham ** when he farts.
  5. Auntie em’s (ex)co-worker is one effed-up bitch!
  6. Blimps are evil. So are Disembodied Santa Heads (Of Death).
  7. Gooses (I know–geese) are greasy.
  8. Elephant-proof pool covers are not cow-proof.
  9. FaerieBeth is buxom, makes her own corsets*, and attacks her husband with a 18"DHIBJD! :eek:
  10. Rio is by Duran Duran.
  11. Something about 1920s style death rays
  12. Consuming a whole bag of chips made with Olestra causes penis to ensue!
  13. And finally, debating the law with Bricker and Jodi would be a blunder of nearly the same magnitude as starting a land war in Asia or going up against a Sicilian when Death is on the line! :slight_smile:

Those were some great past-posts, and I greatly enjoyed reading them! Hopefully I’ll be able to contribute a few that make the Hall of Fame (or was that a Wall of Shame?!).

Mike
*I was extremely disappointed that the links to pictures of said corsets no longer worked! :frowning:

Well, did you bring pie?

and who’s going for the goat? not it.

Sorry…no pie here.

And I forgot about the goat. And the sheep. And the <gulp> squid. Wasn’t there something about a squid? :eek:

There is no squid. The squid does not exist. The squid is the product of a fevered imagination. You can relax.

Welcome!

[sub] :: sploosh :: [/sub]

sounds of splashing coming from room 205
Squid? Nope. None here. Come on over into this room, please. There are things that need your immediate attention.
Also, remove your shirt.

Trust me. You don’t want me to remove my shirt!

If invited to Autolycus’ house for dinner, bring your own silverware. If spending the night, make sure to bring toothbrush, too.
:slight_smile:

not it

Welcome mikemo!! I’ve been a semi-lurker for a while now, myself. The thread that sucked me into this place is your #5. Auntie Em’s Coworker. That thread was soooo long, and filled with such drama and hilarity, I couldnt look away until I got to the end. I actually PRINTED the entire thread once (do NOT do this unless you have at least 2 reams of paper to waste) to share with my no-web-having acquaintances.

Thank you for reminding me of all the fun things about this place. This week a thread in The BBQ Pit that scared away a newbie made me ashamed that I liked it here. Now I remember that the super fantastic good does outweigh the infrequent bad.
**Master Wang-Ka ** is, in my opinion, the supreme ruler of this message board. All shall bow before him, none shall ever surpass. Although many have come close.

Hey guys (splash splash splash) um, hey, a little help here (splash splash splash) someone wants to meet the new guy (splash splash splash)

Thanks! And thanks to Sunspace for the welcome as well!

I haven’t had a chance to check out the Pit lately…would you mind giving me a link to the carn…er… thread?

By the way…I tend to not be on-line much on the weekends, so I’ll not likely get back to this before Monday.

Trust me, it’ll go much easier if you take off your shirt.

brings out the hose

And you have to sing the song as well.

Welcome, mikemo! Many of those threads are flippin’ hilarious.

The goat? Lost it in the Halloween Cthulu-summoning incident. Wasn’t a pretty sight. Oh, and by the way, guys – take this as a lesson – six points is a Star of David. Just sayin’…

Anyways, welcome aboard.

Oh, there’s another goat. There’s always another goat.

We’re gonna need a bigger goat.

What, no Marianas Trench?

Shhhhhh!

Well, now that it’s out…did anyone remember to get scuba gear for the goat?

Nope, that one has finally fallen off the page. Best let it go. Forget about it Jake, it’s Dopertown.

Welcome.

Really, I’m not a pathological liar, though. Had to pay a couple of bills, and decided to check out the SDMB. I’m not sure I’m glad I did, though…the term “bigger goat” is making me nervous! :eek:

OK…I’ll take off my shirt, but I can’t carry a tune in a basket so the song is right out. Nice lyrics, though! And I won’t be held responsible for any chest hair that falls on the floor (or anywhere else for that matter!).

I can’t believe I forgot the Marianas Trench! :smack: