“Omigod, I’m out of staples!”
I think this is hilarous. No one else does.
Eeek!
“Stop! You’ll put holes in the lawn!”
“What are ya, a retard? I said these were MAGIC WEASELS!”
You’re wrong.
I found that kinda funny too.
Yeah – but you kept a totally straight face for “Omigod, I’m out of staples!,” didn’t you?
I’ll proxy one for Mrs. Call: She found for sale in a dollar store a pin-backed button onto which was printed the words “Give me a dollar”
This was two years ago.
If you say to her “Give me a dollar” she pass her spleen.
I don’t get it.
Every day for work, I have to repeatedly click on and work with something called the “Order Master.” Because of my enormous 80’s move background, I immediately begin thinking of The Last Dragon, and in my head, every thought of “Order Master” is shortly followed by “Sho’ nuff!” I giggle almost every time, five or six times a day for at least the last year.
I often repeat this line from a movie, which isn’t funny at all out of context: “Don’t cost nothin’.”
It’s from Animal House, where Blutarsky (Belushi) admits the two pledges Flounder and Pinto into the frat house, turns, with perfect precision catches a beer thrown from nowhere, then sloshes his mug of beer at them sloppily. “Have a brew. Don’t cost nothin’.”
Guilty feet have got no rhythm.
The day after the 2000 election, who was on the front page of the New York newspapers? Was it George Bush? Nooooooo…Was it Al Gore? No…So was it it? It was Hilary.
When I saw that, I started laughing so hard I had to sit on the floor of the 7-11. To this day, I think I’m the only person who gets the ironic humor in it
Babies falling over.
It is guaranteed to send me into weeping hysterics, and I’ve pissed off many a mother as I guffaw at a well-timed toddler pratfall.
It distills all of the perfect slapstick comedy essences: The innocent stare, the drooly unexpectant smile, the sense of wonder at the newfound challenge of walking…and then…SPLAT!
I often fantasize about lining my spare bedroom with foil, and setting up and amazing grow operation with hydroponics, those uber deluxe lights, etc.
And then growing tomatoes. And inviting lots of people over to my house to pick up tomatoes and then leave.
I imagine the look on the police officers’ faces when they burst in and find nothing but lush, juicy tomatoes.
This I find completely hilarious. No one else does.
If it weren’t for Dave Barry’s large readership and blog fans, sometimes I’d think I was the only one that found silly anagrams funny. Not a person cracks a smile when I repeat his recent anagrams “WEAK-ASS ATHLETES” (Seattle Seahawks) or “LET’S PET SHITBURGERS” (“Pittsburgh Steelers”). I’d better stop repeating stuff like this around work or they’ll think I’m a goon.
We came up with a great one in highschool; an anagram of a classmate’s name. It’s especially funny because we were all heavily into the theater program:
SHIT ME A THESPIAN
I find that funny when they just slowly kind of topple, and remain calmly where they fell like nothing at all happened.
Kind of like Arte Johnson on his tricycle on Laugh-In.
Ok, that rocks. Great anagram! And could also make a horrible/incredible 'toon!
Hey, repeat that stuff enough at work and I bet they’ll let you go home! With pay! 
LET’S PET SHITBURGERS made me LOL.