I was watching a cartoon with a couple of friends once. In one scene a cartoon character had a straw skirt on. It was lifted, to reveal, nothing the kind of nothing that manaquins and dolls have in that area) One friend piped up with “I wouldn’t show my nothing” To which we all laughed at his expense.
Years later, my stepdad’s best friend is visiting. There’s a credit card advert on tv with ninja crabs. My stepdad says, in all innocence, “I wish I had crabs”
While you are all rushing to reply I’ll try to think of any that I’ve said.
When I was ten years old, I spent several weeks building an elaborate home for my beloved cat, Blackie. I upholstered and carpeted the inside, and I painted the outside with cat-themed designs.
Then, using a woodburning kit, I made a sign to hang over the front door of the kitty kastle.
The sign said CAT HOUSE.
My parents thought this was hilarious. So hilarious that every time a visitor came over, my mom and dad would bring them onto the back porch, point to the feline habitat, and say “And this is Blackie’s cathouse.” The adults would snort and chortle, and I had no clue what the joke was.
Not at all accidental, but still funny. My niece had a pet turtle named Maxie. My brother put a sign on the aquarium that said, “Maxie’s Pad.”
More in tune with the OP, when my sister was six or so, we were in Long Grove, a “historic shopping village” (i.e a cute, quaint outdoor mall) when she saw The Dog House. Completely indignant about pet discrimination, she said, “Well? Where’s the cat house?”
Oh, aye, I looked it up, too, which is why I thought “Pussy house” was a little too blatant. I thought this was about innuendo, the accidental type, at that, so I thought, after reading the definition of “cathouse”, it pretty much stood, innocently, on it’s own. I undertsnad that a ten year old may write “pussy”, but it doesn’t work out quite as subtley and perfectly in this case.
I’m just being nit picker while I try to remember something to contribute, carry on!
Friend of mine came out with a good one once. Watching his fiance rapidly demolish a slice of chocolate cake he came out with the immortal line “Do you chew, or just swallow?” :eek:
I doubt it was unintentional, but still funny, years ago before the parking garages were built in the West End in Dallas, the Dick’s Last Resort restaurant had a sign out front that said “Parking for Dick’s in Rear”. Yes, it’s sophomoric. Of course I loved it.
Back in the late '60s, my brother (twenty or so) was dressed for a late date. In the style of the day. (About which my daughter once asked if the '60s-era movie we were watching was set at Holloween. It wasn’t) Among other things, he was wearing a long silk scarf in place of a tie. We were at the dinner table, and, as my mother passed him his plate, she said:
"Be careful not to get your Ascot in your dinner."
We drag this one out at family get togethers even unto this day.
The other day I went to lunch with my BIL who works for the same company as I. It was extremely windy out, and my hair, being waist length and curly, was billowing everywhere. As I swatted it away from my eyes and spat it out of my mouth several times my BIL laughed a lilttle bit and said… “Bad hair day eh?”
For one of my math lessons, I had my middle school students bring in examples of 3-d shapes that we were studying. As one of the students was sharing at the front of the room, another kept playing around with his shape–distracting those around him. I let it go at first, then walked by him and quietly asked him to stop. He did.
Later, during another student’s sharing, he started doing it again. I loudly spoke up this time from the front of the room
“James! Quit playing with your cylinder!”
This class froze, waiting to see my reaction. It hit me then that they what they were all thinking. I tried my best not to laugh, but couldn’t help it.
