So, I’m riding the N train to work this morning, and I’m idly contemplating the ads on the walls of the stations, when I come across an ad for some new human-interest-family whatever, featuring the smiling faces of the focus of said TV show/movie/special/whatever.
And I busted out laughing.
Some artist-in-training had taken it upon himself to use a black marker to color in the two front teeth in every smile, creating a family portrait of hockey players.
I thought to myself, “How childish.” But I still couldn’t stop laughing. Because it’s funny.
Other things that are funny:
The devil-horns/goatee/evil-eyebrows graffiti.
Correcting the language of other graffiti artists (At the Hunter College stop, I saw, in bold letters, “Kill this fucken traitor Bush NOW!” Underneath, a helpful fellow had written, “You spelled ‘fucking’ wrong. I hope you don’t go to Hunter.”).
Word-balloons with naughty phrases in them. Tell me you’ve never laughed when you’ve passed an ad for “Seventh Heaven” and seen Revered Camden announcing his fondness for homosexual sex.
The graffiti thing got my mind going, but there are plenty of other always-funny things out there, like whoopee cushions and that trick where you tap an unsuspecting person on the opposite shoulder from where you’re standing, causing him to flail around for a few amusing seconds.
What are some of your favorites?
I’m going to describe this badly, but it’s hilarious to me. At my local taco bell, there is an electric hand dryer in the bathroom with an illustration showing how to use the dryer. The warm air is depicted in the picture as red, wavy lines coming out of the dryer into the person’s hands. Underneath this someone has written “Press button, receive bacon.” Cracks me up every time I see it. So much, in fact, that I’m tempted to carry a sharpie marker everywhere I go so that I can write it on hand dryers everywhere.
I’m not usually a fan of pratfalls or other physical comedy, but a well-excecuted flying tackle is comedy gold. Never fails to crack me up.
Example: The commercial on SciFi Channel where they were “auditioning” new SG team members, and the one dude makes a break for the Star Gate, and some Airforce guy comes hurtling in from Stage Left and takes him down. Gold, I tells ya! I never once failed to snicker at that.
Tripping and falling is all well and good, but the solid “walking totally unaware into the solid glass door so hard that people across the room can hear the ringing thud sound your melon makes on the glass” is even better.
Watching someone walk through the park, and a squirrel zooms in from out of nowhere and starts climbing all over the person’s pants chattering angrily, and the person is jumping around and yelling and shaking first one leg and then the other trying to get this hyper crazed squirrel off his pants, and then the squirrel just hops down and zooms away, and the person stands there for a minute looking stunned.
For a while I was making my own form-feed labels that read, “Cash or credit cards only. Personal checks not accepted.” Then I’d walk around Manhattan, sticking them on pay phones. I haven’t done this for a while, but I’m thinking about starting again. Just thinking about it amuses me to no end.
Try having a dim-witted cat. Our Boy kitty can never remember there is glass in the window. Picture this: Unsuspecting bird gently lands on the window sill. Then it’s seen by the jungle kitty, who goes into hunt mode. Slowly he creeps, inch by inch, until with a feral merooooow, the fierce jungle kitty leaps for his prey. Only to thud against the dirty glass (he does this often). Yep. Nothing like a merooooo-thud to start the day with a smile.
In my hospital the chairs around the nurses stations all have two levers on them. One makes the chair go up or down and the other makes the seat part tilt forwards or backwards. When someone is sitting in the chair, it’s mildly humerus to make the chair drop down by hitting lever number one. But it’s hilarious to hit lever number two and make the seat of the chair tilt forward suddenly. I call them the elevator and the dumptruck respectively. Neither causes anyone to actually fall out of the chair, but it’s funny to see the looks on their faces.
Forgot a couple.
When you stick a pen into the release mechanism on an office chair. Anyone who sits in it gets the elevator ride down. Getting off makes the chair pop back up again. Hours of fun.
Watching two people walking, head-down, around a blind curve and bumping smack into each other. The better-dressed, the funnier.