The miracle of extrusion, otherwise known as an industrial food spooge.
hmmm… I still like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with doritos in them, cheese and ketchup sandwiches, pickles and cheese on a saltine cracker, ramen noodles with cheese, mashed potatoes with baked beans on top, and pizza with sour cream. I think that’s the weirdest stuff I ever ate…(food-wise)
Hm–I can’t remember having terribly bizarre food fetishes when young, but here’s a couple things:
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Well, I don’t do this but my wife still does: she hates peanut butter & jam/jelly sandwiches, & instead eats peanut butter & relish sandwiches. Her favourite relish for this purpose is onion relish.
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I grew up in Halifax, Nova Scotia, which has a foodstuff which is to my knowledge peculiar to the area (or was at the time–maybe it’s spread now, like poutine): the donair. This was apparently the invention of a few middle-eastern fast food chefs in the area: gyros wrapped in pita bread, with the sauce replaced with a cloyingly sweet white sauce instead. I always thought this was an ordinary fast food item until I drew blank stares when I ordered it in food joints in other cities. However, this was sorta good: what causes me to mention it here is that it wasn’t long until they also dreamt up the donair pizza… (very cheap) cheese, greasy donair meat (you know, the kind that is on a vertical spit & sliced off in strips), tomatoes, onions & a gallon of that mysterious syrupy white sauce. As a kid I liked the donairs but gave the donair pizza a wide berth.
Apropos of nothing, by the way, except that it sounds awful, my local Chinese bakery sells cans of asparagus juice. I haven’t worked up the nerve to try it.
–N
Here’s some stuff I used to eat as a youngin’:
- Liverwurst sandwiches
- Petals from random flowers
- The sap from these little blue flowers we had around the house
- My older brother used to make these fried pieces of bread. They were just plain white bread soaked in oil and fried until they were a fatty sponge-type thing. I gag just thinking about it
- I used to eat cat food with cheese. Actually quite tasty
- Peanut butter and marmalade on toast…mmmm, delicious
- Weetbix with lots of margarine and Vegemite spread on top. I used to like eating this after school while watching cartoons
- Condensed milk straight from the tin. I did this once and was sick for a week afterwards
- Toothpaste. Sometimes I’d just eat some of it if I was bored or hungry
Good God. I nearly puked laughing so hard. You people are sick fucks. Keep it up. I’m proud of you.
–Tim
I believe that this thread has just been bestowed praise from one of the masters.
Com’on Homer, you’ve eaten or drank something weird in your life. Let’s hear about it. I mean, your ingestion of fungus alone is legendary at these boards.
I used to get a couple of slices of ordinary supermarket bread (as opposed to good bread) cut/eat the crusts off, then mash the rest togethor and until it was just a little ball of bready stuff. Easy to accidentally stuff yourself in this form, cause you can fit half a loaf of bread into the same volume as a single sandwich. If I was feeling up to a bit more effort, I would put a filling of stuff like cheese, mustard, sour cream, ham (whatever I could find in the fridge that looked like it might be a good idea basically) and then stick it under the griller (tried the toaster at first, took me forever to get it out again).
I also used to eat rolled oats like normal cereal, instead of cooking it into porridge. Preferably instant oats though, cause it soaks up the milk better. I still would eat this, except that I don’t have breakfast terribly often these days, mainly due to being too lazy to get up on time.
Also two minute noodles, but instead of cooking them you crunch them up in the bag (don’t open it first or you make a big mess), then pour the flavouring over them and shake it up. Kinda like potato chips.
And I have been known to eat raw onion on occaision (not much of it though, since I do it more to weird out mum when she’s making pizza, and also cause my brothers will be nicking bits of salami and ham and cheese and she tells them to stop it, so I come along and steal some onion instead. 
)
I loved to eat cheap bread that way when I was a kid! If I rolled up more bread balls than I could eat, I would lob the extras at my sister.
I don’t know where you live, but you can still get it here in Alabama. My kids love it. My husband loves it. I can’t even look at it in the fridge without gagging. I tried it one time when I was a kid, and it tasted nothing like ham OR cheese…I can’t even describe how it tasted, except I remember spitting it out. But yeah, you can definitely get it here, much to my chagrin.
Silky “You can get lunch loaf here, too” Threat
As a child I use to love ranch dressing, straight out of the bottle. Come home from school, take a nice long chug. Now the thought of it makes me nauseous.
I also liked steak fat as a kid.
In my college years I would eat popcord with soy sauce…no butter, no salt, just soy sauce (not that bad really).
Mac and Cheese, to this day, I add extra butter, no milk, and that orange powder. The generic brand is always better than the good stuff (Kraft).
My parents, big health food people, would buy us raw milk from the dairy (Not pasteurized or homogenized), raw eggs, and dairy butter (no salt, no coloring). It’s a wonder I made it to my 30s.
I also like green olives straight from the jar, delicious!
oops, should say popcorN. I normally wouldn’t correct a little mistake like that, but after I saw what over people ate, I wanted to make sure no one thought it was an electrical cord. Also thought of another one, while walking the tidepools in CA, I would happily munch on any kelp I came across, and also suck the nectar from honeysuckle flowers (I have no idea if this is a good thing or not).
Potato chips with ketchup.
“Garden Vegetable Medley” from Gerber Baby Foods, up until I was about 4. (For the record, I still eat Dutch Apple Dessert and Hawaiian Delight from time to time. Mmmmmm )
Also one of those Vienna Sausage people.
Cottage cheese with lotsa pepper.
Hot chocolate mix mixed in with cold, cold milk. I loved eating the lumps of undissolved cocoa. Excuse me while I shudder.
White bread with peanut butter and maple syrup.
White bread with bleu cheese dressing on it (eaten w/ a fork).
Sugar sandwiches- white bread, of course, with butter and sugar.
Vienna sausages, spam, braunschweiger (sp?)were all staples.
Hi-C canned “juice” by the truckload.
Novelty candy, like Lik-M-Aid and other corn syrup creations.
Ugh. I’m gagging just thinking of this!!
–tygre
I would sip the ‘nectar’ from the base of any kind of flower. I would pull up tall fronds of tall grass - crabgrass? - and bite off the sweet white tender end of the stem. I was also a great one for drinking ‘wild water’ - cow pond, ocean, rainwater gushing down the street, mud puddles, you name it. It’s a wonder I lived to grow up.
ndorword: Your “donair” sounds remarkably like the UK’s culinary delight, the doner kebab. The doner was well-described by visitor Bill Bryson as looking like an old woman’s leg. In Oxford, the doner kebab is usually sold out of the back of vans, to drunken students. The “donair” also sounds like a somewhat tame version of our cuisine, which in England is usually sold with a taste-destroying chili sauce.
I would describe some of the better or worse kebabs I’ve had in my time, but that would fall under “things I can’t believe I ate as a student.”
- raw hotdogs
- honeysuckle juice. Actually, I’ll still stop and eat some if I spot it while I’m walking.
- chilled rice. It had to be cooked, place in a bowl, and placed in the refrigerator overnight. The top part was dry and not that tasty, but the bottom was yummy because all the juices settled down there and made it sort of sweet.
- frozen french fries. The kind that you cook at home in the stove. I just didn’t cook them.
- raw cookie dough. Even now I’ll buy a tube of that Pillsbury kind and eat it over the course of a week or so. It tastes so much better than cooked cookies.
- raw cake batter
- raw brownie mix
- chocolate frosting right out of the can
Ah yes, raw macaroni. Take a handful and chew. Keep chewing until it’s mostly crunched up. Suck the farina out of it. Chew some more. Repeat as necessary. One mouthful lasted about ten minutes.
It’s a wonder I have any teeth left.
I still do that!
I also used to dip sour cream & onion potato chips in my chocolate shakes while I was still in high school… yum!
I used to eat
toast with bacon grease soaked into it
raw bacon
chocolate chip cookies with ranch(still good)
raw ramen noodle soup packs
hamburger chip sandwiches(still good)
raw potatoes with salt
salt straight
chips with salt or heavily salted dip
ice cream sandwiches made with bread and ice cream
bacon sausage egg fried potato syrup and mustard sandwiches
onion and mustard sandwiches
cat food
balled up bread
fried bologna sandwiches
ham and bean soup with sardines
sardines and mustard on rye with melted cheese
My mom used to make this fried egg and tuna concoction that i loved then but now ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww
I think thats it
God I was sick