I use a pair of toenail or fingernail clippers.
As for the question posed in the OP, I grocery shop when I’m hungry, and as a result, I overbuy and load up on tasty but unhealthy food.
Get on the elevator without paying attention to whether it is going up or down and then act sheepish, “Guess I’ll take a longer ride today” heh, act sheepish when it goes back to the floor I started on and opens for the former me, “Heh, that was for me”, press Close Door and finally make it to the original destination. :o
Go with a group to visit a friend in the Madison UW Hospital. The hospital is on average 6 above ground floors and 2 sub levels. It’s made like a honey comb in multiple hex units, and to go from some upper floors in one hex you need to go down to lower levels and go up elevators in the correct hexs. Have said patient on the sixth floor. Need to visit bathroom and get told you have to go to the 1st floor and half way back to the entrance. Use the bathroom, exit the bathroom, pause to think about going back, and relise you don’t know where the people are visiting the patient. It could have been worse in that I at least knew the patients name. I have gone with friends in the past that visited their freind, that I don’t know.
Actually, I shave while in the shower. But then, I’ve never been so hirsute as to actually warrant paying attention too much while shaving.
I always put my wallet back in my pants before I receive my change. I also get my time of day wrong when greeting somebody on the phone - I’ll cheerily answer the phone with a “Good afternoon!” at 9:15am. Or “Good morning” at 6:34pm.
I use oven cleaner for unintended purposes (not illegal.) It is a badass cleaner. It takes pitch and gum off of tablesaw blades, for example. It removes lots more than your average nasty funk in the oven.
Also removes fingernail and any leftover skin residue from the fingernail removal process.
Its great.
I found a guy at a flea market who would make up custom bumper stickers on the spot with a little roller press. I got a couple made up that say “I park wrong on purpose” three times across. I cut them up in threes. When I’m frustrated by some crumb who parks his fancy car over the corner of 4 spots in the movie lot, I get one out of my trunk and slap it on his bumper.
Of course it’s dangerous because he may come back or someone may rat on me, but I figure it’s not something they’ll jail you for.