Taking it Slow, Saying Hi

Hey, I suppose this’ll be my first tentative step into the wonderful world of The Straight Dope Message Board.

Since this post is little more than an introductory ramble, I suppose I should tell a little about myself, right?

I am a 16 year old high school student living in Ohio. Yeah, 99% of this board was rocking it before I was even a thought. I’m interested in computers, video games, etc etc. I don’t recall how I managed to find the board, but I’ve lurked for a few months, and I just now have worked up the courage to join up. In terms of interests other than technology, I love history, specifically the Roman, Byzantine, and European colonial Empires, and the Islamic caliphates have piqued my interest as well.

Soooo… hey! :cool:


There are bunch of Ohio-ians and other Midwest folks around. I’m sure they’ll stop by with a casserole to say hi. :smiley:

Just from this you’re already off to a better start than a lot of newcomers.
Welcome aboard FMI!

Who needs casserole when you have corn? It sure is plentiful enough around here. :wink:

Welcome! I assume you’ve figured out that you should don protective gear before venturing into the Pit.

Welcome, welcome! Would you like some ice cream? I just made some wasabi-mint. It’s still fresh.

Oh yes, especially when venturing into the political threads. :eek:

But, surprisingly (or maybe not), I’ve read worse on the internet. Far, far worse.

Woah, that’s a thing? :dubious:

Sounds a little too exotic for me, thankavermuch. I’ll stick to my cookies and cream. Yum.

It’s always fresh. Someone should teach it some manners. :slight_smile:

Welcome, Ignorance! Have fun!

Welcome. There will be some forms for you to fill out. No big deal.

Hey, you sure picked the best username ever… You’re gonna have a good time!

Welcome, fightmyignorance! The bathrooms are out back. If you change a toilet paper roll, make sure the roll unspools from the bottom up, o.k.?


Beware the squid.

You think this is some kind of joke?

Did you think no-one would notice??

I bet you were the kind of kid that put two beta fish into the same fish tank. :stuck_out_tongue:

Oh goody, fresh young meat.

Welcome! :slight_smile:

Welcome to our little corner of the Interwebz.
Remember to keep your arms and legs inside the cage while the ride is moving.
Please do not feed the trolls.
Have fun.

Be sure your tray table is in it’s upright and locked position.

Welcome, FMI. You said “piqued” and not “peeked”. Excellent.

  • note to self: separate the betas *

Of course. What primitive fool would ever confuse the two?

Welcome. Here is your first test and while it was not on the registration form, the correct answer will bring you respect and admiration while an incorrect answer means time with the goat and squid.
Cheesecake or Pie ?

As long as we’re doing The Questionnaire…

Coke or Pepsi?
Astérix or Tintin?
East or West?
Night or Day?
Montréal or Toronto?
Rural or Urban?
False Dichotomy or Shades of Grey?