This is totally uncalled for. I’ll lay 5 to 1 your time here is over, which means I need to go buy the champagne right now.
I’m squinting and trying to find a way that this post could mean World Eater has volunteered to bring champagne to the SF Dopefest.
If, by some miracle, this is the case and you’re not just being really really not funny, then let me give you a word of advice. Bring a LOT.
Miller, I’m with Aesiron - I just don’t understand why this is upsetting you so much. Usually when I read a thread and think about posting, you’ve been there first and said what I wanted to say, and far better than I would have been able to. Obviously this doesn’t mean that you would think like me, but you seem so far on the other side that I’m having a real hard time getting it.
In the almost four years that I’ve been a member of this board, I’ve seen some pretty brutal pit threads. Threads that would make this one seem like a giant group hug, with a complimentary reach-around. I could be mistaken, but I don’t remember you in those calling the OP a bully and an asshole, so what’s different here?
I may not wind up agreeing with you, but I really want to understand.
Sorry, I’ll be working. I, along with the lots of champagne I’d buy will be there in spirit however. 
Why does everyone here hate America so much?
Because the wetback won’t leave.
[apologies to all involved with Overboard]
Joanna: I don’t hate America. Do I?
Edith: Of course you do, dear.
Dr. Korman: Why don’t we all hate America.
Grant: I don’t hate America. I never hated America. Why do I have to hate America?
Edith: No one’s interested in your problems, Grant.
Actually it’s more of an allusion. And if you don’t know the difference, then I’m leaving.
Who the hell am I to leave? My post count isn’t nearly high enough for anyone to care.
snort
Look, folks, this OP is done every few months when some schmuck makes a grand exit, only to return six minutes later. As Aesrion mentioned, it’s part of the Circle of Life in the Pit, it has since 1999, and it always will be.
Now, especially if you consider Lobsang is the target. While never really doing anything mean or jerkish, his posting certainly shows a history of attention-whoring, and he takes “mundane and pointless” to new horizons. Most of what he posts screams “attention whoring” to me. Despite all that, I only find him mildly annoying, and he’s never raised my ire enough to pit him… though he’s one of a handful of names that catches my eye, and not in the good way.
If nothing else, his repeated behavior has inspired many a “what the fuck was that about?!” and I doubt I’m the only one that applies to.
Add all this in with one of the classic SDMB insta-Pit moves (“I’m leaving!”) and you will have a pitting.
Funny, never saw it that way.
Chill out. I ain’t leaving until I’m done with all the white women.
Your point?
Oh, you meant leave the board.
I thought you meant the country.
Holy shit, you go away for 2 or 3 years and the Pit turns into a church picnic.
Thanks for bringing the ants, Demo.
Did ya’ll miss me?
No?
Well, so much for the community of humans that cares about humans.
I’ll just go back to the boards over at bignippledwomen.com, where they love me, and my dinner plates.
No, we did’nt.
So I guess starting a thread about my triumphant return (har!) would be a bad idea, then, hmmm?
Ouch.
Why the bad blood, Liberal? What did I ever do to you? 
Man, how do you people sleep at night with those sticks jammed so far up your asses?
Just kidding, Psycat. Making fun of your misplaced apostrophe is all. 
No fucking way! No fucking way Demo comes in here and starts shit without me. What, dude, the times we had in here mean nothing to you?
For the rest of apron-dangling crybabies in here-go back and look at the OP. If it weren’t for the dumbfuck “link for parody” rule, Lobsang would’ve never been singled out. This hand-to-forehead “I must leave, for this den of iniquity/hatred/people who wouldn’t dribble piss on me was I on fire is no longer my place” melodrama has been going on for-fucking-ever. Lob’s just the most recent perpetrator. Demo was simply pitting a phenomenon we’ve all been subjected to time and time again. I can almost guarantee he doesn’t care if Lobsang lives, dies, cries or shoves a feather duster up his ass and starts calling himself Chicken Boo.
Man, I wish DB was still around here. That was some fun.
So, who wants to guess who was in #straightdope yesterday?
Yeah, and if you bothered to pull your head up from Demo’s crotch, you would’ve seen that I already fucking explained that- on this page, no less- you fucking jackass.