This makes me sad...

My 8 year old son and I listen to NPR every morning on the way to his summer camp. He often asks me questions about the stories they report, and we have some interesting talks on different subjects. This morning NPR had a story on the gay Episcopalian bishop being ordained.

Sam: “Mom, tell me about that story”

Me: “OK. Do you know what gay or homosexual means? It means that you love someone of your own gender.”

Sam: “Dillon (a friend of his) says that he was chased by a ‘freakin’ gay guy’”

Me: “I don’t know why Dillon said that. Gay people are people just like you and me”

Sam: “Mom, I’m not gay”

We finished up the conversation, coming to the conclusion that its OK to be gay, that you should never look down on someone who is gay, and that people who do so suck, etc. etc., but I know he told me he wasn’t gay because he knows already that there’s a stigma attached to being gay. He’s only eight, and already he knows this.

Waits for a gay SDMB member to come along and say he is in denial

Okay, I know this is The Pit and all, but WTF is this all about, smam?

You know anytime someone on the board is having a go at gays who may or may not be on the board someone will usually mention that the person having a go is probably gay because they have mentioned at some point in one of their posts they are not gay.
It’s like a gay person is so proud and all and yet they say everyone who mentions they are not gay more than once is in denial. I mean if it’s so good being gay and all then why throw it at straight people like it’s some sort of fire-ball?
Basically, gay people call straight people “gay” to insult them , which to me suggests that the gay person themselves thinks there is something wrong about being gay.
And that won’t help the sisters at all.
btw I am not gay.

I have never seen this. I have seen straight folks using the term gay in a pejorative way, but never the other way around. This is not to say that I have not seen and heard of people that are particularly vehement in either their condemnation of gay people or their hysterical insistence that they are not gay being accused of being closeted, but that is a different matter (more to do with either the notion that the behavior is out of proportion with anything reasonable, or the notion that they somehow have some large part of their personal invested in being perceived as straight).

For the record, there have been times when folks thought that I was gay. I consider it a complement. Also, for the record, you’re a dick.

smam, what in the ever-loving hell are you talking about?

Nope-you’re not gay-you’re stupid.

Are you sure?

For the record it’s better than being a humorless shite-bag, although you do make me laugh. Unfortunatley not for reasons you would consider a compliment.


I’m sorry; “having a go at”? Heh, heh.

“Lookit me! I’m British! I have goes at people! Lookit at my location line! I’m using fake Ebonics! Ho, ho, what’ a lovely go that was that I just had! Who next, then? You sir, I’m going to have a go at you. What fun!”

Hee-hee. Talk some more.


Because you said that when people think you are homosexual you take this as a compliment. Why would you think it a compliment unless you had stereotyped views of gays? When you are called queer you must assume then that they are referring to your gentle nature? Your nifty dress sense? That perhaps you smell good? They are appreciating your bitchy one-liners that can crush a man from 10 paces? Your ability to hear ABBA? Your ability to be one of the girls in a non-threatening manner?
Because I know for a fact that heterosexual men are capable of all these things.

So come on, tell me Mr. Cosmopolitan why it is a compliment to be presumed to be homosexual without landing on a stereotype. The only real difference between gay and straight men is that gay men have sex with gay men and straight men have sex with straight women. So if you did not have a slightly bigoted view (albeit in favour of gays) of gay people then why should it be a bonus to be called gay? Surely the remark should be neither positive or negative.

And also explain to me why I am a dick because I made a joke which your following post only served to highlight the substance of the humour in that joke. That if someone protests they are not gay because of a stigma that they deem to be attached to being gay the perhaps the lady doth etc.
Hell, your post backed me up you bloody twit. And for the record your tone of voice in your post made me think of a nob quaffing wine for some reason, not drinking it like normal people , fucking quaffing. I bet you were all like “ Ooo ha ha, I put that urchin in his place while at the same time making myself out to be all politically correct. “ Well it didn’t work this time mister.

Btw I am in no-way trying to say anything about the 8 yo old boy. I just thought I would stick my joke in and good thing to as it makes the thread more pit-worthy.

Do you honestly think anyone on this board will say that about an 8-year-old boy?

Perhaps you’re in denial. :wally

ouisey, its indeed sad that your son knows that… But you did a noble thing as a parent, rather than forming a movement to get NPR banned in your area for saying “gay” in the presence of your child.

So, really, this is a positive moment, not a negative moment. Your story was beautiful.

As a lesbian whose own mother spends a lot of time rallying against the “homosexual agenda” that’s trying to get acceptance in her own church (Methodist), I thank you.

Do you honestly think anyone on this board will say that about an 8-year-old boy?

Perhaps you’re in denial. :wally

No I do not, the context of the comment has been explained, it was a joke. I did not mean to hi-jack this thread so perhaps you should all speak about the topic in hand now that people are replying in the way that it was intended. This should not be in the pit (or at least it should not have been).

smam, what I have is a stereotyped view of the straight mainstream, and that when someone assumes that I don’t belong to that group I feel gratified. Granted, we are still talking about a stereotype, but there you go. I assume that in this case, as a member of that group, I am allowed some leeway in stereotyping them. That falls, for the most part, within acceptable Politically Correct guidelines (although you seem to find efforts to be politically correct a bad thing???)

Not sure what to tell you about the quaffing business. Sounds to me like you have some sort of class-based inferiority complex going on here or something. For the record, my drink of choice is Gin and Tonic, and you are still a dick.

For the record politically correctness is a bad thing. I dont have a prob with class it’s just I feel I ascertained something about your character by the things you say. You want to be loved, you have a thing about my dick, you like baths better than showers. Do you still remember the lambs Binarydrone? Yeah ur just one generation from cable TV salesmen aren’t you?

Anyway I finished work 2 minutes ago. I am sure this will continue tomorrow

Hey! I’ve got a “class-based inferiority complex”, thank you very much, and I’ve never accused anyone of “quaffing”.

A. No, dunce, we do not use “gay” as an insult. The plain fact is that the most vocierously homophobic men tend to be guys in deep conflict over their own sexuality, as confirmed by a study at the University of Georgia in 1996.

B. It is sadly ironic that a native of England has so poor a command of English.

C. “The sisters”?

D. You keep telling yourself that, sugar.

Okay, call me Rose Nylund, but I did think you were joking at first. Then you defended yourself instead of saying ‘hey! joke! sorry you didn’t find it funny!’. So now I don’t.

I agree that it sucks, ouisey. Makes me sad too.