Walt Whitman wrote and rewrote the “Leaves of Grass” poems numerous times. Supposedly it was some sort of meditation exercise he would perform when he got angry.
What?
You got five minutes to get rid of that word.
If you really think that, then you’re a retard.
I don’t have to take this abuse from you, I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.
You’re stupid. Your conspiracy theories are stupid, your taste in movies sucks, and you are unequivocally, unquestionably stupid.
Not now, Mom, I’m posting.
Burpo, what are you doing? You really should think before posting that sort of nonsense…
Well that went over like a wet fart.
I don’t get the joke IG.
Pope Urban VI asked three cardinals in the Vatican one day, “What’s the strangest confession you’ve ever heard?”
One of them looked around carefully and then replied, “This Latvian nobleman once told me he secretly called his cow ‘IG.’”
The Pope was on a lengthy flight and was doing a crossword puzzle to occupy himself. He appeared troubled, and at length leaned over to the Cardinal seated next to him and asked in a low voice “what is a four letter word for intercourse that ends with ‘k’?” The Cardinal replied, “why, that would be ‘talk’ of course, your Holiness.” The Pope appeared relieved and asked, “may I borrow your eraser?”
No, the punchline is, send this kid to fifth grade, I got most of those wrong myself.
Well - back from hospital! They did a pretty fine job I must say but the bad news is I have to stay off it for a month and a half. Blech. Luckily I have my deep abiding devotion to the music of The Wiggles to keep me entertained!
Hey, Aspidistra, how did it go at the hospital? How about recovery time?
Aspidistra, you should have known better than to try to do that with a vacuum cleaner.
I hope you’re okay and heal up quick!
Okay, so, there’s this teacher, and this know it all kid, and she takes the kid to the principal.
“Johnny wants to go to the fifth grade.” He’s in third grade now. “I don’t think he’s ready.”
So she asks him a bunch of questions.
“What starts with F, ends with K, and means a lot of heat and excitement?”
“Firetruck.”
“What starts with P that a dog does and a man steps in?”
“Pants.”
“What starts with P that a man has in his pants that a woman doesn’t?”
“Pockets.”
She asks him some more questions, I forget what they are, and the principal says, " Give the kid what he wants."
Does anyone know that joke about the kid who wants to skip a grade, and the teacher asks him questions?
Anyone have any jokes?
Kinda getting dull around here.