To all you idiot parents who insist on taking toddlers to movies…FUCK YOU, why are you so damn selfish that you have to take young babies to the movies and spoil it for everyone else. I saw Traffic this weekend. This movie is over two hours long and some moron could not wait until they could find a babysitter or wait until it is out on video. You are one of the reasons why it is unpleasant to see a movie… along with assholes who don’t put their beebers and cell phones on silent mode. What child can sit still for 20 minutes, much less two+ hours. Hey here is an idea, stay home and bond with your child, raise them to be considerate of others, don’t so they grow up to be respectful of other people and not spoil things for others. And if you still insist on being an ass and taking a young child to an grown-up movie, take them to the lobby when they start screaming, nobody wants to hear it!!!
I have to agree with you on this one–mostly. I have no problem with kids in the theater, AS LONG AS they are well-behaved and it’s a kid-friendly flick. But there are countless thousands of the hopelessly stupid who bring young kids to adult-oriented movies, and then do NOTHING when those kids ruin the movie for the rest of us. I’m not talking about an occasional comment to Mommy or a few kicks to the seat in front of them, either–I mean running around, yelling, or the I-ca’t-breathe type of crying. I haven’t even mentioned the dickheads who bring their young to frightening or disturbing movies and then tell them to “shut up” when they cry or get scared.
I have a baby. He is sweet, placid, and good-natured. Even so, I wouldn’t DREAM of taking him to a movie. Although he’d probably behave the whole time, I’D be a nervous wreck, wondering if he was about to squawk. This means I’m the only person I know who hasn’t seen Castaway, for example, and yeah, that bites. But hey, all you parents with young kids: that’s what the VCR is for!! Or, hell, plan ahead a little and get a sitter.
Don’t get me wrong: I love kids. And if I go to, say, a Disney movie before 9 pm, I expect and even welcome a theater full of kids and their accompanying noise. But where I live, people have larger-than-average families and will often haul their offspring to the late-night date flick and then not lift a finger when the kids scream, whine, or act up. Ho boy, do I have stories…
It’s a pity that drive-in theaters all seem to have gone away. It was the perfect place to take the kids to a movie when I was growing up. Put the kids in their pajamas, make a giant bag of popcorn, and let them jump around and make noise as much as they want until they fall asleep (usually 10 minutes into the flick), letting mom & dad watch the movie in peace with no fear of disturbing any one else.
I have to really, really want to see a movie these days to make it worth the trouble of going. No matter what the movie is there are always some people who are going to bring children far too young for it. You can’t expect a 2 or 3 year old to sit still for 2+ hours of “13 Days” or “Traffic”. Of course they’re they are going to get bored and start demanding attention. I didn’t pay $8.50 for the pleasure of listening to non-stop whining & shrieking that some parents seem to be able to completely tune out. And no, saying “Ssshhh!” every couple of minutes for the duration of the movie is just not an acceptable solution.
A few years ago, I went to see a fairly adult movie (I think it was “Innocent Blood”), and there was a woman with a couple of young kids with her in the theatre (around 2 and 4, I guess). During a steamy sex scene where the vampire lady takes out a condom, one of her small kids asked loudly “Is that chewing gum, Mommy?” To me, that seems like a perfect example of “What the holy hot place is that kid doing in this theatre watching this movie?”
If you’re around Chicago, the Cascade’s a great drive-in (actually, there are a couple others, but this one’s my favorite). It’s out in West Chicago, so it’s quite a trip, but $4 for two first-run movies per person is a great deal, and the kids can bounce around in the back seat and only drive their parents crazy.
As for the OP, you’re totally right. When I went to see “The Cell”, a pretty graphic and disturbing movie, there were SEVERAL children under 8 or so. Come to think of it, there were kids at “The Exorcist” too. Who the fuck are these people? 'Course, my knuckleheaded sister lets her ten-year-old watch “Next Friday” and similar raunch…my son’s t-ball teammates have seen all of the “Scream” movies (these are 6-year-olds)…so maybe I’m the weirdo here.
I have a baby just over two months. I vow never to take her to the movies unless she’s ready to be quiet, and the movie is something on her level. I pretty much have given up on theater-going for the next several years of my life. That’s life. If you’re going to have kids, you have to be prepared to make the sacrifices.
A local (triangle, Misson Valley) theatre has a baby night. You can bring your kid to the 7:00 show on Tuesday. Sounds like a good idea, maybe I will try it some time. My first baby was due Monday but is being shy.
There are also restaurants that have screaming baby night.
True story about the fact that some parents leave their brains at home when they go to movies:
I am watching a movie in one of those 16-plexes. I notice that there are two little girls standing by the door, desperately peering around the dark theater, and I realize they’ve been there for a while. I go see what’s wrong.
Turns out that the mom dropped off the girls in the nearby Disney movie and said “come find me when your movie is over.” But the older girl (they were 7 and THREE!!!) couldn’t remember which movie her mom said she’d be in. So they were wandering from theater to theater, looking for mom. The three-year old was crying softly: “I want my mom.”
!!! I still haven’t gotten over that. That mom is damn lucky that her girls found me before they found a child molester. Those kids were so frightened that they would have followed anyone anywhere. Idiot mother.
Another firm supporter of drive-in movies. Admittedly the speaker gizmos sucked, so the sound was pretty pitiful. And after a while you didn’t notice the moths fluttering around the screen.
Mom and Dad would pop us in the car, already bathed and in our jammies, and have blankets in the back seat. We rarely lasted much more than a hour, then conked out. The teenagers would congregate around the concession stand to flirt–nobody with a lick of sense parked near it–and everybody was happy.
Nope, there’s nothing like a “WTF?” sighting of a young child.
Especially in an R movie. I mean, the last movie I watched was The Emperor’s New Groove, with my 10-year-old cousin, and of course there were tons of kiddies there. All in good fun- the whole theater was being loud, but that’s the Disney spirit.
However, I remember walking in a theater to watch The Cell and seeing some parents bringing their kids in. :eek:!
Yeah, let’s give the kid nightmares for a month and disrupt everybody else. I couldn’t finish watching that thing; I can only imagine what little Junior was thinking.
I remember going to see Interview with the Vampire for my first date, and a family was there-mom dad, and two kids, probably 13 and 10. Old enough, I suppose, but since WHEN is IWTV a family movie?
I’d wondered about that. (Electronics dolt, here.) Though it wouldn’t be as much fun watching people drive off, ripping the speakers off the posts, accompanied by catcalls and the sound of scraping metal. (My dad did this once; pissed him off no end.)
Great rant, btw, Chimaera. Pisses me off when people thrust kids into situations their attention span won’t handle, then either ignore them or blame them for being kids. (“You’re acting like a child!” “I AM a child!”)
I think that there is a geniune lack of family-friendly movies. My kid is four years old and is able to behave herself during a movie. “Hooray!” my husband and I thought, “We can see movies in the theater again without getting a sitter!” However, on most given weeks these days, there may be one movie that is “G” or “PG” rated (This week, it’s “The Emperor’s New Groove”.) Every single other movie out there is “PG-13” or “R” (Hmmm…not too many “R” movies, either. I guess they think teenagers are the only people who see movies these days. Maybe they’re right.)
This doesn’t excuse parents from bringing their children to inappropriate movies, of course. But–one movie appropriate for children in a 16-screen movie theater? If you want to see a movie in a theater with your children, there isn’t a heck of a lot of appropriate choice. Are we expected to stay home until the kid is 13 and doesn’t want to be seen with us anyway?
Got that right! Either the movies are busily tossing pointless sex and violence in to sell, or dumbing them down to the point they’d give a newborn dry-heaves. Either way the writing usually sucks.
It is perfectly possible, though not easy, to use wit and heart to tell a story that works on multiple levels. Somehow marketing and censorhip have gone hand-in-hand to marginalize movies. Too bad, too bad.
When I saw Saving Private Ryan the couple in front of me brought their 3 or 4 year old son with them. He didn’t disrupt the movie at all, but the poor kid was curled up in fetal position, flinching at every loud noise. I felt so sorry for him, and very angry at the parents - one of the most commonly talked about aspects of that movie was it’s extreme violence and gore.
Ooh ooh! I have a good story about a rude person in a theater getting their comeuppance!
I was on a date in college and we went to see “The Matrix” at the matinee showing. Some teenage girl was talking loud enough to be heard throughout the entire theater before the previews started and during them as well. The theater flashed the usual “silence is golden” message and then there were a few moments of silence before the movie’s opening credits began. She was still talking. At that moment some guy yelled from the back, “silence is golden, bitch!” Her mouth shut so quick you could pratically hear it snap. It was great.
So… children of any age are allowed in to the cinema to see any film, regardless of its suitability, if they are accompanied by an adult?
In the UK, the film classifications (U, PG, 12, 15 and 18) mean that if you’re under age, you don’t get in to see the film.
Our system has its problems, too. A mature 14 year old would not be able to see a 15 rated film, even if she was accompanied by her parents. Of course, if she looks 15, no problem.
I’m disturbed that someone would take their 3 year old to ‘Saving Private Ryan.’ The same parents would probably watch the same films at home on video, but at least in that case the boy can run away if he’s scared, and not be forced to sit through the whole thing.
I have a friend who is in her mid-seventies, who still occasionally has a recurrent nightmare from a movie she saw** 70 years ago**! It was a vampire movie, and not very scary by today’s standards. It just made an indelible impression on her subconscious mind. I would never, ever take a kid to a violent movie!
