You know, average is 14.
I think I have that beat by noon.
Nope, negative 3.
Does that mean that I fart 3 times for you, or is that just an elaborate way to blame the dog again?
It’s more of an implosion than an explosion. Gives you a hella wedgie.
So it’s like you have a miniature black hole in your rectum that decides to open up 3 times a day?
Quantum beef.
Quantum queef?
Quite.
Why did my yak just queef?
Just checking in to see if y’all are keeping up to the etiquette & decorum standards for these boards.
Hmmm.
Yak Jizz? Check.
Toilet jokes? Check.
Porn references? Check.
Genitalia dicsussions(Human & otherwise)? Check.
Everything looks OK here. Carry on.
Will do, senor.
**How Can I Convert The Pastor Of My Local Pentacostal Church To The Misanthropic Luciferian Order? **
I’d rather you make him a Pastafarian.
Split the differance, how bout we make him a snake handler?
A python wrangler?
Nope. Not good enough.
A Hare Krishna with an attitude problem and a really big nose?
Can’t we just settle with “Bong Hits For Jesus”?
No fucking way, Jesus always either bogarts the whole thing while talking too much or he coughs right into the thing and gets water all over my carpet. Last time my mom almost killed me.
Fuckin’ Jesus.
Seriously. Did I ever tell you about the time he turned the water in the bong into wine? I coughed for like two weeks.