Threads you were too chicken to start

I almost started a thread along the lines of “Fellow America-Hating Liberals: How are you undermining our troops this 4th of July?”, but didn’t. Largely because, however much I might disagree with many of our conservative dopers, they very rarely pull a Coulter/Rove and attack the patriotism of liberals in general. Plus, playing divisive games with July 4 would be in poor taste.
What threads have you contemplated starting, and then decided not to?

After shoulder surgery this spring, putting on a bra became a major challenge for me. I was telling a girlfriend about not being able to reach behind myself to do the hooks, and she was surprised I hooked behind the back, she’s a hook at waist level, swivel and pull up type.

Got me musing on how many different ways there are to put on a bra, which are the most common and why, but before I managed to post a poll about it, the vicodin kicked in and I forgot. :wink:

I wanted to start a thread asking how people’s pets reacted to Star Wars movies (esp. the sounds). Yes, I know it sounds really silly, but it had enormous potential as a thread, tapping into the dog- and cat-loving people and Star Wars geekery. Besides, I was genuinely curious as to whether dogs were barking at Chewwie or reacting sympathetically to the baby-like sighs of R2D2, and so forth.

I wanted to start a thread asking what was the best automatic weapon for a killing spree.

Since day 1, I’ve toyed with the idea of starting a thread entitled What The Fuck Is Your Problem, but always had trouble formulating the OP.

Hmm…looks like I know what the fuck my problem is.

I seldom initiate threads, but I was too chicken to post something recently. I nearly defended Scott Plaid in The Pit, but I lost my nerve. :frowning:

Oh, and I’ve been this close to starting the “Dopers: you’ve ruinned my life and I hate you all with a passion and want to kill you, your wives, your relatives, and your children, and while I’m at it - nuke your country” thread many times.

Every now and then I toy with I Pit the Entire SDMB Membership for Being a Bunch of Precious, Anal, “Cite”-screaming, Nitpicking, Grammar Policing Wankers.

Probably not a good idea though. And mostly I wouldn’t mean it. But sometimes…

I almost started one recently on what the required intelligence level was for Dopers. Like, would they date someone who was mentally retarded? Or genius level?

The hampsters ate my post and I thought it was all for the best.

I am a complete Star Wars geek and Mr. Del (previous to knowing me) had never seen any of the SW movies. I joke about this sometimes and say we have a “mixed marriage.” I’ve thought about starting a Tell Me About Your Mixed Marriage thread, hoping to hear lighthearted stories about, say, a Yankees fan married to a Red Sox fan, or a dog person married to a cat person, but I was always a little nervous that mixed marriage might be a loaded phrase for some posters, or that some of the stories might be not-so-lighthearted.

I’ve thought many times about a “what-the-hell-is-spirituality” thread, but gave up trying to word it properly. Then **Eve **came along and did it better than I could have.

“Were You Popular in High School?” is a can of worms I’m not sure I want to open, but damn, am I curious.

Usually I don’t chicken out of starting things (case in point), but off and on for the past few months I’ve considered starting an IMHO thread called “Do you feel that you work hard for your money?” Because I don’t, and I really wonder if I’m the only one who feels this way. But every time I think about writing the OP, I decide that I could probably never get my point across and that I’d just wind up sounding like a snotty bitch or a horrific slacker (or both) and that ultimately I’m too much of a wuss to go there.

Why Half of the People Involved in Notorious Train Wreck X Were Wrong

Funny this should come up. The other night, I was gonna start The Post Your Own Opinion About Anything and Everything Thread where everybody would post an opinion about anything they wanted (tipping, dryer lint, politics, etc.), but I couldn’t see it ending in anything other than a total trainwreck, so I went to sleep.

Grammar-Policing, surely?
I’ve been toying with starting a thread called something like Tell Me Your Weight-loss Problems And I Will Diagnose The Cause, but I guess I’m too not-the-other-white-meat. Probably a good thing considering the nature of the advice I was going to dispense.

Because of a really startling event in my past, I tried to get up enough nerve to start a thread asking the doper gals if they’d ever… well, you know… done THAT just to say thank you to someone (non-SO).

The SDMB is certainly a lusty bunch, but I was still afraid of offending…

This would probably go down as the Thread of the Milleneum. And you really don’t need much content.
Do you have what it takes to become an Immortal, Hal?

During the “Ask the” Thread heyday, I wanted to start one, but all I could think of was “Ask the Natural Cleaning Expert.”

In reading one of the sex threads, I thought about starting a thread asking How long do you want intercourse to last? But I had just joined and had already replied in several current sex threads and didn’t want to get known as someone who only talks about sex. I may think about it all the time, but I certainly don’t need that reputation…