Not if they’re properly administrated, no. Have you ever been to one? You don’t just walk in off the street and help yourself (at least not at the good ones). The adminstrators do screenings and they decide who to give boxes to. It’s not like a free supermarket where people just raid the shelves. You submit your information, including names and SS#s of everyone in the family and the adminstrators put together a box (after verifying info, including income status, and making sure you aren’t double dipping somewhere else. You only get baby formula if you prove you have a baby. You have to provide the baby’s SS# and DOB. Then they pack a box for you.
Is it possible for someone to scam the system to get a free week’s supply of baby formula to sell on the streets for rock? I suppose it’s theoretically possible, but these places tend to know their families, and what they need, and it’s not exactly going to be a lucrative source of income anyway.
The odds of getting scammed are much higher on the internet than at a Second Harvest or a Catholic Charities, I assure you.
A few things: Br’er is taking the decision role upon himself. I see no problem with that. He’s taking the packing role upon himself. I see no problem with that. He may not be asking for paperwork, but he is checking with people who he somewhat trusts (at least more so, I’m guessing, than the unknown Teeming Millions that don’t post here) to see if he’s satisfied with the “neediness” level.
Furthermore, he’s taking it one step further, DtC–he’s not requiring the needy person to so much as get off his/her couch. I don’t really know why you feel entitled to be the resident expert (that’s the angle you seem to be coming from, as far as I’m concerned) on charities and women’s shelters, but in reality, AFAIK, you could well be some other douche, like seodoa, that feels the need to step in where he’s entirely not needed. The bottom line is that your opinion is no more valid than other’s in this area. Your moral footing is no more secure than those endorsing Br’er’s original intent. So yeah, you’re the one coming off as pompous.
And dropping lines like
make me wonder how it is that you KNOW this about every shelter in the country. Do you have anything besides your limited personal experience to back that up?
Oh my God. I have explained myself a million times over. I was only asking a question. Please tell me, exactly what is so douchey about wanting to know, out of simple curiosity, why Br’er would want to give the gift over SDMB rather than through a charity organization! I meant no ill will and I was in no way criticizing her! I was only asking a question and, frankly, I’m getting tired of people giving me way too much shit over it. I have explained myself far too many times now. I have even apologized for the apparent misunderstanding I’ve caused. Stop the fucking public stoning already.
And, again, I know I came across that way and for that I sincerely apologize to all involved. It was at no point my intention. I asked the question out of simple curiosity. As I’ve said in a previous post, I really didn’t understand why the OP would consider SDMB over a local charity.
Yes, I did say that the only reason I could think of for choosing to do it over an internet forum was for recognition. But I also said that I was in no way saying that was the case! I merely said that that was the only reason I could think of! I wanted the OP to give me the actual reason. I would never NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER (for mercy’s sake) NEVER, presume anything about an OP. I can only work from my own experience, which could not be anything like the OP.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. My intentions were misunderstood, and I’m placing the blame for that on myself. I worded my post poorly, it was taken the wrong way, I’m sorry. I just don’t understand why, despite how often I try to explain myself, people would rather right me off as “a douche.”
ETA: Boborygmi, I was going to shut up, I really was!
But thank you for reading my posts, I swear I’m not the douche they paint me to be!
I’m talking about food shelves, not shelters, and I didn’t say I know about EVERY food shelf, but I know something about well run ones because my wife used to coordinate several of them.
Without getting into an argument, I’ll tell you why I’d rather give over the SDMB than locally. Because I’m different from you.
I don’t see that either as bad or good! I just feel this is a community. I have participated in various exchanges over the years, I just sent a sympathy card to the family of someone who died, etc. I like the people here.
So why not send it to someone in a community of people I know a little about, rather than total strangers? I don’t say everyone should do this. That’s just how I prefer it.
…but is there anything wrong with wanting recognition for a good deed? If that’s what it takes for someone to do something nice, what the hell does anyone care? i don’t hear anyone complaining that Bill Gates should have anonymously donated $60 billion to charity.
Of course not. I don’t understand that attitude, either. It’s all about “I do it THIS way, so this is the only right way.”
Honestly, give, don’t give, give publically, don’t give publically - do it to your own belief systems and what you can live with. In the end it’s MY charity dollar and no one is going to dictate to me where it goes. And I work for a charity!
You have some serious fucking mental problems. “Public flogging?” What the fuck are you talking about. She wants to make a donation. I’m saying food shelves are good places. I made an offer to match her donation if she took hers to one. You falsely accused me of shitting on her for being charitable. You made that up. It didn’t happen. You won’t cite it, because you can’t cite it. If you don’t want to produce cites, then don’t make shit up, ok?
Incidentally, I haven’t said a word about the Be’er wanting “recognition.” Quit fucking lying.
She implied with her question about the “pat on the back.” Obviously, there’s no reason to say that unless she’s implying that I expressed a similar sentiment about Br’er.
Sorry, I missed that you got your own accusation thrown right back at you. Mea culpa. (yes, for those keeping score, that was a “you started it”)
Not obvious at all. You didn’t accuse Br’er of needing a pat on the back, and I wouldn’t go so far as to say that you need a pat on the back yourself, but those two things are unrelated. It’s pretty obvious to me that FarmerChick was accusing you of the latter, not the former.
But there was no reason to make that accusation except to imply hypocrisy on my part. If she thinks an announcement per se is enough to merit the accusation, then she has to make the same accusation against Br’er..
