“Dear Husband.”
How do you feel when someone refers to herself (seems that guys don’t do this) only as “Mommy of two adorable little girls” and suchlike? 
Nothing is as horrible as DH.
You think my real name is Hockey Monkey? Dude we all have made up names.
Agreed. But I didn’t think we were discussing baseball. 
Pet peeve alert! You’ve hit on one of mine. I’ve noticed on messageboards and on livejournal there are a lot of women who identify themselves that way as a screen name:
briansmommy
jennysmomma
::shudder::
Oh fuck you.
No seriously.
In one breath you feign compassion and caring for the protection of those too young to post here and in the next you casually single one out for those who may have not known. No she wasn’t “too young to post here” and it wasn’t really a secret what her age and sex were, but you don’t need to dole out that info do you? If you believe there are predators here online why on Earth would you be so stupid?
We have a member here, a silly young fellow whom I like, once posted something that contained his name here. I didn’t jump into the thread and say “You shouldn’t post stuff here that could link you to your IRL name!”, I merely sent him a PM. And it wasn’t anything like “you gonna get raped”, just a short and polite message with a few suggestions on what you should and should not post publicly.
I wrestle back and forth with whether or not you are an authentic troll, but you are an idiot and a jerk sometimes. And also now a little bit creepy.
You mean like those Viking names in Iceland’s phonebooks: -dóttir -son?
You should use “The poster formally known as Pepper Mill” and “The poster not yet known as MilliCal”; that would alleviate the confusion in the peanut gallery. 
“Dear Hitler,” the controversial relationship-advice column that was very popular in Germany in the mid-1930s. A scandal erupted and the column was brought to an end when it was revealed that several columns were in fact written by Eva Braun.
Or give them appropriate names such as TLDRIKDJKLOLFTW and TLDRIDKJKLOFLTW.
There are plenty of options available.
Good one.
It’s not? Next thing I know, you’ll be telling me you’re not a real monkey, either.
Yup. Sure is a good thing guys don’t do that.
yea, I immediately thought of you.
And here I was worried that he might think I was being patronizing…
What does it say about me that I originally read it as “Designated Hitler”?
That you’re a true Doper, I guess.
Cheers!
The SDMB doesn’t allow subscriptions from users under 13 because it’s illegal to give Internet memberships to people under 13 if your servers are in the United States. Don’t be stupid, IDK. I know that will be a challenge.