I was actually thinking borderline personality disorder. My sister had it, and everything Alice is saying is on the money.
After getting to know her, I don’t know if she’s truly a narcissist. She does have some of the symptoms of BPD, except she doesn’t harm herself or do things impulsively, other than with her own mouth, of course. IANAD, but she almost certainly has something. You know there’s something wrong when, as I told her, there could be a support group for people that have worked for you, and it would have to be held at the Tucson Convention Center. 
Relating back to this thread, is she still going to be your surgeon?
If so, you’re a braver woman than I’ll ever be.
Alas, no- I don’t see that happening now. But that’s okay, she probably would have put it off so long my insides would’ve fallen out at work, and she would’ve then demanded that I go into the bathroom, stuff them back inside, and get back to work. Then ten years later, decide that she could spare me so I could have surgery and recovery time.
I refer to her as one of those “going to” people- she’s always going to do this, and going to do that, yet never seems to get around to doing those things. I know she’d have done that with my woman parts, and it would’ve just pissed me off.
I may be out in left field here, but what I was taught was the key thing about narcissists was not that they necessarily always had to be right and be the golden boy/girl, but that they never accept full responsibility for anything. They always have to cut themselves some slack; they never completely submit to another person’s opinion of them.
I’m not a psychologist and nobody but a trained mental health expert in the proper setting should make a diagnosis. So I don’t know if it is NPD or Borderline or something else. I have worked with the same sort of character with the same sort of bullshit.
That’s a great parting line.