Vivalostwages…
Pregnancy is not necessarily the answer. I was pregnant about five years ago-miscarried at ten weeks. In my case, endo runs in my family. The doctor who misdiagnosed me TOTALLY ignored the medical history I gave him. I’m lucky I switched doctors because cancer runs in my family as well. My mother has been in remission from cervical cancer for six years now. My grandfather, aunt and nephew have all died from various forms of cancer. Yet I still smoke…
For bad cramps, I recommend in all honesty, have some sex. It’s exercise, it feels nice, and if nothing else, it may take your mind off it for a while. Then you can go to sleep. There’ve been some studies that I’m too lazy or stupid to find right now, that indicate physiologically how and why sex makes you feel better. And my own non-clinical trials show that sex does help my cramps.
Failing that, I second Opal’s Nyquil recommendation.
Yeah Manda Jo your right about the midol thing. Never noticed that before. There are some teas that do not contain caffine though, we have a non-caffinated tea at work.
Three letters: I U D[sup]*[/sup]
While they don’t enjoy great popularity in the USA, they are widely used for contraception in the rest of the world. The reality of IUDs is that they are a safe, cheap, and highly effective method of contraception.
There are two type of IUDs available in the US: the copper T (paraguard) and progestasert.
The copper T contains no hormones (read: no mood swings or weight gain) and has a 0.8% one year failure rate (compared to a combined hormone birth control pill failure rate of 5%-the theoretical rate of failure is actually lower, about 0.1%, but since it’s hard to remember to take them EVERY day…). Insertion of an IUD is an office procedure and the copper T can be left in place for 10 years. If you use the copper T and decide that you want to get pregnant, fertility rapidly returns to normal after the device is removed. Disadvantages of the copper T are:
- Menstrual flow increases on average by 35%
- Menstrual cramping may increase (about 12% of women have their IUDs removed before one year because of #1 and/or #2)
- 1/1000 women develop pelvic inflammatory disease (PID) within the first 20 days of insertion (afterwards, their risk of developing PID returns to baseline)
- IUD may be spontaneously expelled. If this goes unnoticed, it puts the woman at high risk of pregnancy
The progestasert IUD contains progesterone and has a one year failure rate of 2%. A new IUD is inserted at yearly intervals. As with the copper T, fertility rapidly returns to normal upon removal.
Some advantages of progestasert are:
- decrease in menstrual blood loss
- decrease in menstrual pain
- theoretical reduction of endometrial cancer risk
- following he first 20 days post insertion (when the risk of PID is 1/1000), women have a lower than baseline risk of developing PID secondary to progesterone effects on cervical mucus
Disadvantages include:
- woman may experience spotting or cessation of periods, creating anxiety over possible pregnancy
It may be reasonable for many of the posters in this thread with complaints of severe premenstrual pain to consider progestasert. If you just want a reliable, long-lasting, spontaniety-enhancing, and safe birth control method both the copper T and progestasert are good options.
[sup]*[/sup]Factual information and stats in this post are from A pocket guide to managing contraception. Nelson, A., Hatcher, R.A., Zieman, M., Watt, A., Darney, P.D., and Creinin, M.D., Bridging the gap foundation. 2000. Webpage: http://www.managingcontraception.com.
Hell yeah, baby. I’m not averse to pills, and I’m a TREMENDOUS fan of boobs 
Where does a 39 year old man sign up, prithee tell?
( ducking the imminent beating that’s coming my way from the Teemenstruating Millions 
)
Cartooniverse
I’ve been eagerly awaiting some smartass male doper to come in and tell all us gals premenstrual pain is just in our imagination, but Cartooniverse your offering was almost just as good. 
I have endometriosis and had lots of other adhesions because of abdominal surgery many years ago (these were snipped recently, which helped). But, I’ve always had horrible cramps, vomiting, constipation before and diarrhea during (I don’t call me “The Witch” for nothing!–and this is probably too much information). And, I echo the multitude of wise women before me who say take the painkillers before you feel pain if that is possible, or at the first inkling if not. Also, even though when the pain sets in, the fastest way for me to get rid of it is to get some real exercise. All I really want to do is curl up in a fetal position and hold my breath, but if I make myself go out and walk somewhere fast, jog, or swim, I really feel better within 15 to 20 minutes.
My doctor doesn’t know why the constipation and diarrhea exactly. She suggested that I might be sensitive to the hormones that peak just before during menstruation. I know that progesterone can cause constipation, and maybe the diarrhea is my body’s effort to “clean house” once the progesterone has peaked. Totally unscientific, but that’s my theory.
Also, on the continuous pill with a week off every four weeks–last year some doctors were recommending this as not only not harmful, but possibly helpful in preventing breast cancer. The theory has something to do with the exposure we have to estrogen, which peaks during menstruation, I believe. That may be invalidated already, I haven’t heard.
Good luck. It sucks :(!
Oh, Tequila, I knew that wasn’t in my head! #1 daughter banged her little head on my spine too. And then the back pain started with my periods. Coincidentally, I threw my back out at about the same time I got pregnant with #2 daughter and needed chiropractic treatment for quite some time after giving birth to get my flexibility back in that part of my back. Anyway, the chiropractor and I discussed my back pains with my periods and so he worked on that area too. It’s not nearly so bad anymore. (I don’t know why. I don’t really understand that stuff.) Anyway, it’s an idea.
This is what works for me for cramps. 1)Regular exercise for the three weeks that I’m not on my period and then like practically nothing when I’m on. It does irritate it worse for me. 2)Also make sure you’re eating a balanced diet with enough potassium and calcium and all those things that your muscles like to have to keep from cramping. 3)Relaxation techniques. I somehow taught these to myself before ibuprofen was a drug available to women with cramps. Anyway, I just think about my body relaxing from the very tip of my head to the point of my big toe. I think about it very slowly and like there is a circle going around me telling me where to relax. If something distracts me like a bad pain then I start over at the top of my head.
The week I met my wife she got her period. She made me order her not one but TWO tumblers of boiling water, each with 2- yes, 2 shots of Glenfiddich.
I walked her, extremely bombed, to the subway, and got her home. Where she was sick for hours. Endometriosis is an evil thing. No, Cranky my friend, I might crack wise as I did up there, but never would I dare make a remark about this topic. I’m glad you found my letchery amusing, mon petit coco
They’re real, they’re disabling, they seem to be beyond awful. Then, there was the time she had me call 911 because she passed out from them… 
Cartooniverse
I used to think, “Aw, come on. It can’t be that bad.” That was until I read in one of these threads that a woman saved her vicodin (or some other uber pain killer) from her dental surgury so she would have them for her period. Someone who would choose intense tooth pain as being more bearable than menstrual pain has my ever-lasting sympathy. I shall sneer no longer.
Two things:
First, the same prostaglandins that cause cramps cause the diarrhea.
Second, please don’t EVER take 4 tylenol-they can cause liver failure! If 2 extra-strength tylenol don’t work then use aspirin or ibuprofen with it, or better yet, call your doctor for something stronger. Whatever you do, NEVER take more thsn eight tylenol a day. (There is nothing worse than seeing an otherwise healthy person need a liver transplant because of overuse of tylenol).
Fireunderpantsboobs, I hope you’re not serious about that hystrectomy. Many women lose a lot of sexual function. The vagina is shorter, and the nerve bunch around the base of the cervix (one of my favorite sweet spots) is removed.
Check it out really, really well if you want to make that decision. I know of one study that shows an increase in sexual function in women after hystrectomies - but the method they used to determine that was by asking “have you had sex in the last month?” Which in no way takes into account that many women have hystrectomies because of endometreoisis or cancer, both of which can make sex extremely painful and/or dangerous. So, yes, it increases sexual function in women who were sick to begin with. But that’s not relevant in your case.
Of course, it’s really fun to fantasize about ripping that damn organ out and never dealing with your period again!
Yeah, I fantasize about that around every two weeks or so.
I have never had any cramps or mood swings or anything. My period has been coming and going regularly since the ripe old age of eight. Basically, I had to use a calendar to check it: 28 days off, five on (three on if I was on the pill). If I was a day late, I was pregnant.
Well, two years ago I had our daughter, amd we weren’t sure we liked the odds after having a baby every year, so since I was having a c-section anyway, I had a tubal ligation at the same time. Thus began the final phase of my reproductive cycle: menopause. Well, now my period comes about every two weeks and lasts for five days each time. Still no cramps, and I’m not miserable: but the whole thing is a pain and a mess. I do sometimes wish the doctor had given me a hysterectomy and just gotten it all over with. But after reading about how much some of you have cramps and are truly miserable each month, I feel a lot better.
And I have never heard it called “riding the cotton pony.” I’m still laughing…
Wow! I’m not alone! First let me say that I heartily concur with those who advocate taking pain meds before you need them. Also, if 2 extra strength Tylenol aren’t doing the trick, combine it with some ibuprofin. My own doctor told me to do that, she said those two were safe to combine, and often more effective together than either alone. I have had moderate to severe cramps for most of my menstruating life, and have tried just about everything for them. I’ve been checked several times for endometriosis, none found so far.
Some interesting side notes: I too get the gas and diarrhea at that time of the month, though not bad and not every month, thank goodness. One thing no one else has mentioned: I tend to get ravenous about 4 days or so before my period starts. No idea why, and my doc says that about 60% or more of women have this symptom. All I know is for about a week every month I can’t get enough to eat. I eat till I’m full, and an hour later I’m hungry again. Stomach growling loud enough to hear hungry. Embarrassing and annoying, and I try to really watch what I eat during that time. I only gain about 5 lbs, and lose it right away again, but it’s weird to say the least.
I will second missdavis102’s comment about sex helping. My personal theory is that having orgasms and being totally satisfied relaxes me in general, so perhaps it also relaxes my abdominal muscles enough so they stop cramping for several hours. I know, TMI. But, hey, we’re here to share and learn. I find that the more sex I can have during that 3-5 days, the better I feel overall. Better than drugs, IMO. I also tend to get even more horny than normal during that time, so make of that what you will. Mr Bear seems grateful.
Dr Lao, I am also one who has saved Vicodin for my periods at times, so yes, it is that bad for some of us. And Cartooniverse, thanks for your ‘input’ as well. I did pass out once, years ago, from the cramps; scared Mr Bear half to death too. I’m glad it hasn’t happened since!
I haven’t been on the Pill in some time, since hubby kindly got fixed after our daughter was born, so I can’t comment on that aspect.
Yep, I also get gas and diarrhea and nausea and cold feet and hot all over and the only place I am confortable is sitting naked on the toilet. Good heaven! Am I the only one?
I haven’t seen anyone who mentioned the O-remedy. Having an orgasm relieves the pain while Ibuprofen kicks in. My boyfriend always asks why I take such long showers during that time. I wouldn’t tell, it’s between me and the showerhead.
Choosy,
I personally like- as much as one can “like” that sort of thing- the idea of the copper IUD since with all the cancers in my family (of both breasts and various other reproductive organs) there is no way I’ll ever use any form of hormonial birth control, but from what I’ve read in things like Our Bodies Our Selves, IUDs work better on women who have had children. Any idea why that would be? They made the statement, but offered no explaination as to why!
I have never had sex, nor have I had anyone anywhere near my vagina. But I think I can safely say that I would feel extremely uncomfortable doing the deed during my period. Quite frankly, I think it is the most disgusting thing my body does. Plus, I feel like some sort of alien while I have my period. I wouldn’t want anything going down there during that time. No suh. And I would absolutely understand if my boyfriend said he didn’t want to. I don’t want to either. Yuck.