Oh yeah, that’s a great one. Fuck you doc, that’s a really fucking awful reason to bring a person into the world. “Mommy, why did you have me?” “Oh, I didn’t really want you, but the doc said that was the only way to get rid of my cramps.”
[Must … resist… obvious… straight… line… Must… resist… obv. Oh fuck it!]
Sure. I’ve got one you can borrow right here!
Haven’t read the thread, but I just had to drop in and say that the title reminds me of this:
I know I’ve said it before, but that always brings to mind my HS friend who missed one or two days of school every month. I remember visiting her and thinking “bloody hell, it is possible for a human to be paler than a white bedsheet”. Her father was the CO of the nearest military base. When we were in 10th grade, her mother took her to the ObGyn, they got that response. The look in my friend’s face trying to reproduce her mother’s nitrogen-liquifying tones saying “the Commander would NOT be pleased” was… merely worth a lot. The Rx for the Pill those tones got her was absolutely priceless.
Purely for my own amusement, I’m going to assume that you grabbed him by the tie only because you couldn’t easily grab him by the balls.
This kind of troubled me at first. You can have more than one??? Arrrgh! Like some kind of horror movie, The Zombie Uterus That Kept Coming Back.
Then I realized, I just parsed it wrong. Darn.
Oooh, I was like that when my (natural, unmedicated) periods came back after 9 months pregnancy and a year of breastfeeding - except I called it menstrually incontinent, after I managed to once wreck three pairs of trousers within one day.
I love this thread.
Oh that flips your switch? Do a Search for all posts by the Doper name jarbabyj.
That’ll straighten your curls.
The Uterus Over The River Kwai…
Times like this I’m glad to be male. Our man-parts do cause us/lead us into all kinds of trouble . . . psychologically/emotionally/socially, that is . . . but, there’s not quite as many things that can go horribly wrong with the plumbing.
Das Uterus, Uterus! Iterus! Uterus!, A Uterus and a Prayer …
Curses. My uterus evidently read this thread- after well over a decade of going carefully by the calendar, 28 days, could set your clock by it- today the sodding thing decided to start causing chaos, by opening the flood gates over a week early, which has never happened before…
Presumably it wants to be cool and hang around with the dodgy uteri; it’ll be getting a tattoo and taking up smoking next.
Ooh, another WWII flick – Blood on the Uterus.
The idea of a sentient uterus…
“I don’t know how you guys walk around with those things.”
It did get tougher after Lorena Bobbit demonstrated the awful potential of a woman with a pair of scissors scorned.
I’m with ya. I love my Mirena. I started my periods with a side of migraine about three years ago. My mom had those for thirty-odd years so I knew what was down the track for me. I called Planned Parenthood and had that thing in within two weeks. The changes in my flow have been wonderous. Before I had two-three days of “oh my god everything inside me is falling out” flow and I had to have the super-thick maxi pads. Now all I get is the liners and I don’t even notice my period half the time. Whoever invented the Mirena needs to be nominated for sainthood.
good to get rid of that sucker.
might i suggest getting a couple of good photos of it on the tray after removal. then you might find a good one to print out. then later you can talk the photo and say how better your life is.
I just came in here, with chocolate, to express sympathy. I have always been lucky to have a very cooperative uterus which behaves itself, but my aunt had a lot of these problems. Often she was bleeding three weeks out of four. :eek: She went to doctor after doctor and no one was able to help her in any long term sense.
I have to say, on the other hand, last year I went in for the Essure treatment (permanent sterilization) and no one so much as said boo to me about it. My doctor was wonderful, and he was a fertility doctor, normally! But he went in there and blocked up my tubes and I have been very happy since. I was 36, so maybe that’s why, but there are doctors who will do it. Perhaps it was clear in my attitude that I didn’t want any.
Good luck to the OP and here is chocolate for everyone!
I’ll take any opportunity to recite my all-time favorite joke, since it will soon/has become too dated:
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit?
“You gonna eat that?”