To my *best* friend. (long)

Hey, So-and-So, how are ya? Because recently, I haven’t had much time to talk to you…
I’ve basically just been listening to you bitch and moan for the past 2 months how you just don’t love Mr. So-and-So any more… But now, you realize that you’re in love with my brother.

Do you even fucking realize the stress you have caused me? Do you realize the stress that you’re putting on my brother? Because I do. I see it in him every night when he comes home from helping you fix up that shithole house you bought. Oh, and I find it really funny that you say that this thing with my brother isn’t rebound. Oh really??!? You don’t feel happy for years with Mr. So-and-So, and when my brother is the first one to pay attention to you and make you laugh, you INSTANTLY fall in LOVE with him. (Oh, and I also find it ironic that in the past year or two, if a nice guy paid attention to you or talked to you, instantly he was “trying to get in” your pants, and that Mr. So-and-So should kick his ass, and I should stand up for you. What the fuck is wrong with standing up for yourself??!)

Why in the fuck did you bother going through with buying this house if you knew you were going to get a divorce? Because we all know that your part-time-job $5 an hour makin’ ass isn’t going to be able to pay the $700 a month mortgage. I’m sure you’re going to expect Mr. So-and-So to pay you an ass of alimony. (Which, I am starting to come to the conclusion that Mr. So-and-So should file first, and leave your ass on the porch…)

You have nothing good to say about anyone. I have listened to you bitch about how Mr. So-and-So, about how he’s not romantic, he never does anything nice for you, he works too many hours, he doesn’t take care of the baby, he doesn’t want to go out. Well, I 've got news for you sister… Just because you’re 23, doesn’t mean that you still get to party like you’re 21. You are supposed to be a grownup. You chose this life, and now you have to live it. Your husband works 50-60 hour weeks, so your lazy ass can stay home and “watch” the baby. He also works like that so he can afford to pay the mortgage on this house that you so desperately wanted. He gets up at 3:30 every morning, even after you “beg” him to stay up and watch tv with you until 11:30 at night. (What an exciting concept by the way…) He gets home around 4:30, and you want him to immediately vaccuum, scrub the bathtub, and watch the baby while you sit on your ass on the computer. I don’t think so. I know what you do all day. I’ve seen you do it. You go outside, and smoke cigarrettes, and play with Baby when you haven’t put him down for a nap. Yes, I know it’s important to play with Baby. But I’ve never seen a one year old that slept 20 hours out of the day.

You also have nothing good to say to me. You complained to me about how I don’t come to you with my problems. I don’t come to you because every time I try to discuss my problems with you, you tell me, that if I didn’t fuck up so much…Well, listen here. I make all the choices in my life knowing that I will be accountable for them later on. Some times I wish I had done things differently, but I do not regret one single thing I have ever done. And I know you say you don’t regret your marriage because you have Baby. But you know what? I think you do. I think you blame Mr. So-and-So for making you lose your “life” by marrying you and getting you knocked up. I think you will end up regretting this for the rest of your life.
Fuck you. Fuck you, your problems, your dirty crackhouse, your “un-romantic” husband, your crush on my brother. I’m tired of you telling me that you’re going to try to work things out with Mr. So-and-So, and then you tell me “well, it’s hard to be married to one person when your heart belongs to another.” GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK. You don’t know the meaning of marriage, commitment, or anything else in a fucking relationship. All you know is that you’re not getting what you want, and you’re “tired” of it. Well, you know what, sister? That’s just FUCKING TOUGH. Grow up.

Solid and complete–a fine, fine rant.

It’s perfectly possible for rebound-relationships to be very healthy and good things. Of course, doing that requires both involved to recognize it for what it is, and not be morons. (And sure, it’s possible for them to actually not turn out to be just rebounds, but those are exceptions.) That’s tough for some people. I wish the best of luck to your brother in ducking and weaving and in general dodging the aforementioned moron.

Also in line with my usual advice for this kind of thing; when a friend (of whatever level) consistently treats you in a shitty way, it’s generally beyond high time to reconsider the friendship. Life is just too short and too precious; each breath you spend fuming inside over what someone else is doing to you but not acting to stop it is a breath that you will never get back.

Good luck.