Tom Swifties!

“I’ll show Mom! I’m gonna get a Sharpie and put a whole bunch of black dots all over this wall” said Tommy, in pointed remarks.

“I finally got the baby calmed down” said Tom, settling the issue.

“Hey, who knocked this window out?” said Tom, feeling no pain.

“He shot that lady’s butt right off” said Tom, witness to a disaster.

“I don’t care what you say, I’m not taking the SATs” Tom testified.

“Get Mussolini out of here!” Tom deduced.

“You know, Louis, you really should think about disposing of your lab waste in a more eco-friendly manner” said Tom, seeking greener pastures.

“The late 30s, when Desi was courting his future wife, were interesting ones” Tom elucidated.

“Just because we’re French doesn’t mean we can’t have a street gang too” said Pierre, in the spirit of bonhomie.

“I put one over on Ethel that time” said Fred convivially.

“That film was a bit below the highest standards” Tom berated.

“I don’t give a damn about proper punctuation it’s all very silly and anal to me too many people make too big a deal out of it in conclusion I say the hell with it” said Nigel without stopping.

“Your sexual come-ons have no effect on me” said Tom, crossing his T’s.

“I’m an excellent old-time banjo player” said Tom, acknowledging his frailties.

“I’ve had enough of this fleshy appendage on the side of my head! I’m cutting it off!” said Van Gogh, endearingly.

“I’m the man who really killed Dr. Richard Kimball’s wife” said Tom, disarmingly.

“Dammit! Why can’t people clean up after their dogs?” said Tom, bowing and scraping.

“My wife and I were sexually active throughout our marriage” said Tony Martin insidiously.

"I don’t know the answer to that question, so here’s my guess at it … "said Tom waggishly.

“Would you do it if I made you a vindaloo?” asked Tom, in an attempt to curry favor.