“I’m a victim of circumstance,” Tom said, pompously.
“Never mind the electric chair; we’ll just have the prisoner stick his finger in the wall panel”, said the warden, confused.
“Now I’ve got itchy hay stuck in my clothes, in my hair, and even in my underwear!” Tom cried out balefully.
“I would be much more useful if I had a proper room and didn’t have to work in this broom closet,” Tom said, officiously.
“Other people might like it, but as far as I’m concerned that green jelly ruined my mutton”, Tom lamented.
“I like having three referees for baseball games”, Tom said triumphantly.
“I know what I’d like to do to that little twerp in North Korea,” Tom said bombastically.
“I’d really like to have those trousers,” Tom panted.
“And I bet we’d send over a B-2 bomber to do it,” said Tom, stealthily.
“We’ll have a B-1 in formation with it”, said Tom, getting close to the Bone.
“It looks like an A-10 is coming in low,” said Tom, as if struck by a thunderbolt.
“My mum’s sisters made a human pyramid,” Tom said, anticlimactically.
“I’m not going to be inviting any top celebrities to my party,” Tom said unabashedly.
“No! I’m not getting a vasectomy,” Tom said, snippily.
“I hate camping,” Tom said, tentatively.
“I hate it when my yarn gets all tangled up”, Thomasina snarled.
“I hope you leave a big tip for our waitress,” Tom said gratuitously.
“Miss O’Jenny’s thick,” Pat said, misogenistically.
“I see Admiral Jones is being rowed across the harbor in a small boat,” Tom giggled.
“I hate Gordon Lightfoot’s song about that ship” said Tom, wreckily.