Hello, Casey? I’d like to send out a long distance dedication to Martyg for being an insufferable “any musician who isn’t 100% self-made is an industry sellout” hipster in the Taylor Swift thread and getting it locked.
I was kind of holding out hope that it’d be the story of someone who knows her parent posts here, but her parent doesn’t know she knows, and so she hatches a wacky sitcom-plot plan…
I’d find that really understandable if she’d already been a poster here for some other reason – found us hunting for a school project and got interested in some particular thread, or some particular subject we were discussing, maybe? But it seems odd to me to have found this place in particular to go looking for advice. There are lots of online advice discussions.
I suppose she might have a friend or family member who posts here and talks about it.
Not just that, but the way they talk about it seems to act like we should know them. I scrolled back up to make sure it really said this was their first post.
I didn’t know what to make of it. The way it was written didn’t seem to have obvious troll bait in it. All that stuff about feeling guilty and taking responsibility would seem to dampen the outrage potential, rather than increase it.
I was surprised it got so many responses, though. Not because I was sure it was a troll, but because there really didn’t seem to be much to say.
You’re all too gullible, really, even contemplating and wasting electrons that this could be genuine. I read the thread title and a bit of the OP in the pop-up preview and already knew this was a troll. Haven’t read further.
Certainly most 17-year-olds don’t write that well. But then, most trolls don’t write that well, either, so where does that leave us?
As I strongly doubt the poster will ever returns, it leaves us with it slowly fading away and forgotten about.
Good writing is a yellow flag but not definitive. Some 17 year olds are excellent writers.
But she has one weekend to “get her affairs in order,” and she decides to spend a couple hours of it looking for an appropriate message board and writing all that? And that message board is the SDMB?
Forget Tiktok and Instagram; this is obviously the hippest place on the internet for all the teens out there. That’s why she posted here.
I’d also like to point out that some subset of those 17 year olds who wrote beautifully eventually became Dopers.
So there.
Maybe ‘Sadie’ is just playing around with AI.
That is definitely something I thought of. Though it doesn’t really read like the AI stuff I’ve seen. But, with enough tweaking of prompts, it could be done.
It also occurs to me… If she is telling the truth, then it makes sense that she wouldn’t be posting it on her usual online hangouts (whatever those are), because those usual hangouts are probably accessed via phone app. And her phone is probably currently confiscated.
I’m still curious how she found this place in particular, of course, if only because it could offer clues to how we can attract more new users. And that applies regardless of whether she’s sincere or trolling.
Well don’t leave us hanging, who is it?
Y’know … I have been nothing but unfailingly polite … 
Confabulist subspecies. This is a seldom-discussed internet phenomenon, where a good chunk of the stories that you read are likely fictional.
Band name.
Definitely. I’m so hip I can no longer see over my pelvis.
Given the interest in replacement hips here, I’d say we’re definitely hipper than most!
Wasting electrons? O wise one, how perspicacious of you to perceive the obvious so quickly. We are but lowly apprentices at your feet.
My reaction to this point is that she could have been lurking for a while before her first post. Actually, that’s true whether she made up the story or not. Otherwise, if she is indeed a troll, how came she (“she” now advisedly) to troll us? Is she a trock, now sniggering at us for biting at her shiny lure?