Jake, gazing upwards while riding with Charlie on his way to trading in the car: “Is that a footprint?”
They are awful, misogynist people on that show and I’m ashamed for liking so many of the jokes.
… And instead of bending over or kneeling down to plant his seeds in the ground, he spits them out into the plowed earth.
Not at all suggestive of anything. Oh, no. 
I thought Martin Sheen played Rose’s father, who started dating Evelyn. And it turned out he was just as stalkery and crazy as his daughter.
Nothing beats that scene in “Old Fame With A New Wick” with Alan, Charlie and Berta watching Evelyn and Bill (nee Jill) on the terrace. No dialogue, but their expressions are priceless. And Berta’s line “This one makes them gay and this one makes them guy.”
If Charlie weren’t a misogynistic pig, there would be no humor in it all. Not all comedy is uplifting or inspiring.
Come to think of it, it almost never is… 
I think that’s the one where Evelyn was going to marry another guy (don’t remember who offhand), but it fell through when it became clear Charlie had banged and then dumped his daughter, as he was wont to do.
Charlie’s old flame shows up and is now a transman, played by Chris O’Donnell:
ALAN: Who’s that? Poker buddy?
CHARLIE: I used to.
That’s the same episode, and Evelyn has a one-night stand with Bill. When Berta finds out, she tells Charlie “If you let me tell her, I’ll work free for a year.”
**JAKE: ** Why do men lie to women?
CHARLIE: We lie to them because we *love *them and want to *protect *them.
Herb Melnick portrayed by Ryan Stiles. Nobody is better than playing laid back better.
I think that Chuck Lorre realized if he could have Charlie Sheen play himself with the best supporting cast ever, he’d have a hit. And he was right.
I also enjoy the Season 4 episode “Walnuts and Demerol,” where Charlie is about to boink what might be his sister.
***Dorothy: **It’s not like we couldn’t expect this, given that your son has spent his adult life humping his way through the Los Angeles adult population!
Evelyn: Oh, like this booze-addled tart is an innocent victim?
Gloria: Hey, I’m drunk not deaf!*
That is one of my favorite, episodes, as well. It was a fantastically-funny show, especially for the first few seasons.
Charlie and Alan take Herb to the first porn flick he’s seen in years.
HERB: Tell me: Whatever happened to pubic hair?
Walden Schmidt (Ashton Kutcher) is looking through Charlie’s piano bench. He finds some sheet music, some women’s underwear, a dildo, and Jake’s bong.
“Songs, bongs, thongs and schlongs!” he exclaims!
There is also the episode where Charlie is dating a woman who looks like a younger version of his mom. As the two ladies are staring each other down, Berta IIRC says something like “I gotta quit coming to work high.”
The episode where Evelyn borrows Charlie’s car, and later he find a bra in it. He’s holding the item when Alan walks in, takes the bra from Charlie, and asks whose it is:
Charlie: If I tell you, I can’t untell you.
Alan: C’mon Charlie, whose bra is it?
Charlie: Who borrowed my car today
Alan (tossing bra aside): Holy mother of God.
Charlie: No, our unholy mother of Satan
Charlie put the bra in his pocket, and later Evelyn asks if he found anything in the car after she returned it. Charlie asks some dumb questions, and finally:
Evelyn: Charlie, I left a $750 bra in your car.I want it back.
Charlie takes the bra out of his packet and hands it to her).
Evelyn: Charlie, that’s just sick.
My favorite was Hi, Mr Horned One
Isabella: You know, people like you have been persecuting people like me for thousands of years.
Alan Harper: Hmm. Well, that’s a bit hard to believe seeing as people like me have historically been victims and food.
Earlier in that same episode
Lydia: … I watch what I eat
Berta: Goin’ in, or comin’ out?
Watched a few more episodes today. I was pleasantly surprised to find one of my musical heroes (Elvis Costello) in the house, along with Sean Penn and Harry Dean Stanton.
I also like how each episode title is a line from the episode.
mmm
“Is that…?”
“Yes.”
“And…?”
“Yep.”
“And…?”
“He used to be.”