[QUOTE=DiosaBellissima]
You don’t get to keep calling the situation or people creepy if you are voluntarily welcoming them into your life.
You know what most people do when other people creep them out? We don’t invite them into our homes. We don’t drive around the neighborhood searching for them. If you welcome the crazy, you lose the ability to whine about it without judgement and mockery.
[/QUOTE]
Quoted for truth. That’s it right there in a nutshell.
Accuracy is a wonderful thing, if only more people appreciated it, the time and energy saved would easily power large cities.
I am not whining about anything. I am not even complaining. I’m sharing. Because it’s entertaining, clearly.
Have you actually read what I have said about him? It’s everyone else that’s convinced he’s a serial rapist thisclose to going on a Sandy Hook rampage, and I who has been saying he’s harmless, he just smells funny and is clueless about the effect of his vulgarity.
Nor did I “drive around searching” for him, I happened to see him.
I am exactly like most people in that when I am creeped out by someone, I decline to invite them into my home. Moreover, I can call anyone I like creepy, invited or not, but in this particular instance, I was not referring to Tex being creepy, I was referring to the character on* Breaking Bad* being creepy and that it’s unfortunate that he resembles such a creepy character.
As for exposing myself to judgment and mockery, no need to be coy: among a certain contingent of Dopers, there’s nothingI could say that is too innocuous to escape judgment or mockery. If I tried to predict it and alter my behavior in advance, I’d never say anything. Which, while some will certainly grab that to say some version of “Good!” , that’s of course untrue. If someone really didn’t want to experience me, they’d skip my posts and threads, and for those people who find their entertainment in judgment and mockery, I am apparently the gift that keeps on giving, and I’m sure they’d be mightily disappointed if I went away. 
Which all begs they question why on earth you don’t find it creepy when some mostly-stranger asks you to suck his cock.
a. Breaks my heart to see yet another wonderful phrase in the English language get flattened out into meaninglessness.
b. Not strangers at that point.
c. I did find the request itself icky. But that’s a different thing than finding a human being creepy. Besides, boys of all ages have proven to be stupid, tasteless, clueless and rude when it comes to their fixation on their penises. It’s hardly worth getting riled up about.
Sorry about that. Was posting from work and don’t have youtube access there so I had to try to copy-paste the URL from search results. Must have mangled it. Another try?
Enjoy,
Steven
Is there any possibility the guy raises chickens and thinks you might be inordinately fond of poultry?
a. If you’re calling “creepy” a phrase, I’m not sure using it to describe this circumstance is flattening it out, seems pretty apt to me.
b. You’re perhaps now not reading for accuracy. I didn’t say “stranger,” I said “mostly-stranger.” Certainly no where near intimate enough acquaintances to make this…request…of his remotely appropriate.
C. Again, accuracy…wasn’t calling a human being creepy. I said “why you don’t find IT creepy when some mostly-stranger asks you to suck his cock.” Clearly referring to the action and not the person.
Mmm, sexism, too. Yes, you know those men, totally unaccountable for their behavior as they are just slaves to their erections.
I suspect she’s complaining about the use of ‘begs the question’ to mean ‘raises the question’ as opposed to its older meaning of ‘assuming the conclusion’. She is, unsurprisingly, wrong about it being meaningless. Context allows readers and listeners to determine which meaning is intended which is why this usage is very old and generally unremarked upon.
Ah. You are likely correct. I have to agree with you, the phrase I used wasn’t meaningless as I’m sure it adequately expressed what I meant.
Exactly. I mourn the loss of nuance and specificity across the language, no matter how entrenched. I still cry a little inside every time I see or hear someone refer to something pleasant as “awesome”. Between things like that and the multitude of textisms, it seems clear to me that we are witnessing the creeping takeover of Orwell’s newspeak…
<shrug> Considering the kinds of “socially inappropriate” conversations we have had, I don’t think he qualifies as any kind of stranger. Not a close and dear and intimate companion, but no kind of stranger.
(Interestingly, my former gardner, Manuel D. who works on a dozen houses on my street, is not any kind of stranger to me, either. I know all about his kids, his relationship with his wife and why it has been failing, how he spends his free time, the success and failures of his business, etc. I wept for him when he told me about the loss of his inlaws in a car accident, and I’ve hugged him on that and a few other occasions. We catch up with each other often when he’s working. I guess in my world there aren’t “semi-strangers”- there’s just real strangers and people I have varying degress of personal connection with, their role in my world notwithstanding.)
Ah, I made an inaccurate assumption that you were continuing Diosa’s point. Because I did state that I found the situation uncomfortable and “icky”:
That’s a pretty impressive leap you’ve taken there, and it does not represent my truth, for the record.
Sounds like a personal problem.
Ah, yes, the evolution of language is truly tragic, but we all must bear up.
That’s exactly the problem with this guy. You ARE relative strangers but you’re not TREATING him like one (nor apparently viewing him as one). That’s why he’s acting inappropriately.
Diosa didn’t call him creepy, either.
right, and yet despite the uncomfortable, icky situation he created, you are still seeking him out. Hence the confusion.
I don’t see the leap here, actually. Your remark seemed to paint men with quite a broad brush.
I have to disagree… His behavior is about him, not me. Just as my behavior is about me, not him. The fact that he may feel comfortable with me, or perhaps actively desire me sexually does have to do with me. Everything he has done or not done in connection with those feelings is entirely his responsibility, not mine. Most especially since my behavior has been as far from sexually suggestive as possible. If you believe that warmth, compassion, genuineness and generosity are naturally understood as an invitation for crude and vulgar sexual advances, well, it is clear we have had different life experiences. Which is confusing, in relation to the next part of your reply…
Of course it did. But the brush was not “Men are totally unaccountable for their behavior because they are slaves to their erections” The brush was “it is very common for men to behave in a variety of unappealing ways because of sexual desire, and it is not something which warrants a strong emotional response.” As you can see, my remark was about my reaction to unappealing behavior, Diosa’s interpretation was about responsibility for the behavior. Different things.
And your remark seems focused on the very fact of painting men with any kind of brush at all… If you have managed to exist in a world where significant numbers of men do not behave stupidly, rudely, crassly or any other way due to their desire for sexual release, then you are a very unusual and fortunate woman. Who also appears to simultaneously expect that being friendly and frank will automatically lead to vulgar sexual advances…very confusing, really.
I don’t think being friendly and frank (or warm, compassionate, genuine and generous) automatically leads to vulgar sexual advances. What I’m saying is that for whatever reason this particular guy is confused about what constitutes appropriate interaction between the two of you. AND if a person is clearly confused about that to the point where the interaction feels “icky” to you, it might be a good idea to steer clear of that person, as you don’t know what kind of messages he thinks he’s picking up on.
Well, thanks. I am unconcerned that anything terrible is going to happen.
As it stands I have not replied to him. I don’t intend to unless and until I actually want to get the yard done, and then I will respond as though I never received his earlier email, keeping it strictly business.
So you really do have a yard? I thought all along “yard work” was some sorta euphemism.
To be fair I’ve never had a woman request I suck her cock.
Maybe it’s your standoffish nature?