Well, of course.
Vanilla, I’m going to side with Lucretia on this one. The premise of cheating on ones spouse just by looking at porn, is way out in right field. It seems to me that it’s more of a form of trying to influence morality and /or a form of censorship. What about ones thoughts of sex, or masturbation. Is it ok to look at porn if you’re single? If hubby wasn’t interested in sex with the mermaid, I would think that there may be problems.
I don’t think watching porn is equivalent to cheating. Not even close. Besides, I thought it doesn’t matter where you get your appetite as long as you eat at home. 
Porn the equivalenbt of cheating? You’re kidding! What a joke! We rely on fantasies throuhgout our lives in various states and degrees. Being sexual creatures a great deal of them are sexual fantasies. Mixed with a level of curiosity then we all are going to have sexual fantasies.
Because men are more visual they find solace and interest in sexual imagery (porn). But is thinking of another cheating? Not in my opinion. It’s an area where the thought definitely DOESN’T count.
But I put it to you if porn is cheating, so is reading romance novels.
Why? Because they satisfy the equivalent needs of the other gender. Anything that cause you to fantasise abotu anothe rmust be bad you say. Therefore romance novels fall under the category.
And as Lucretia asks - how far do you go? Obviously any thought or admiration of anyone else is therefore cheating.
I’ve always thought Barbara DeAngelis was the perfect example of a supposed expert who failed to allow for contextual differences between the genders, and this particular idea the best example of it. Under a female definition it’s perhaps cheating but how much of that opinion is inspired by insecurity?
1945: The worst year in human history measured in terms of people killed, houses burned, buildings destroyed, and high explosives set off, Atomic bombs used for the first time and Japan surrenders after Hiroshima and Nagasaki were devastated, President FDR dies before the end of the war, United Nations forms, Hitler suicides a week before the unconditional surrender that ends WWII, Lauren Bacall and Humphrey Bogart were married, Women in France were allowed to vote for the first time, General Patton dies in December in a car accident, E.B. White published the children's classic "Stuart Little."I’d say it sailed right over the stands, across the freeway, and into the river.
Man - when DeAngelis hangs a slider, and McGwire gets all of it…
Now, what I find odd about this, vanilla, is that on your homepage, you have a link to an Abbie Hoffman-centric site…and to make such a narrow-minded statement as the above…well, let’s just say that I don’t think Hoffman would have agreeded with your view. :rolleyes:
to quote * A night at the Roxbury, /*
“Why go out for burgers when we’ve got Steak at home”
When you are on the phone with him, make up a porno story about whats on tv about yourself & the mailman doing it.
I think the next time he asks whats going on… you should focus on the male porn star in -painstaking- detail. Act like he’s getting you all riled up… then say “Baby… I need to go…”
Nothing proves a point like bringing out the hypocrite in your mate. =)
Or just tell him its bothering you and make sure he knows you’re NOT kidding. No subtle hints… no overt hints… Hints never work. -Be direct-.
And best of luck. =)
Handy and malkavia–you two crack me up! I can just imagine my hubby’s reaction to that!
Man, I HATE trying to empty my bladder through morning wood. the only way to aim at the bowl is to stand on your hands.
You guys ever see the episode of Friends when Joey and Chandler get the free porn on their TV? They’re watching it ALL the time. Finally, they get sick of it and turn it off… only to turn it RIGHT back on.
As per your problem… just set the ground rules. Talk to him. If you really don’t mind him watching the porn, that’s cool, just be sure he knows that you’ll have sex with him when you want to. If the porn DOES start to bother you, talk to him about that too. Don’t build unnecessary resentment. Sounds like you’re both being pretty reasonable. Things will probably be fine.
One final aside… a redheaded Mermaid… yummy… my longest-lasting and most intense crush has been on Ariel, Disney’s Little Mermaid. She’s basically my dream woman. If your man really does end up pissing you off… well… I may not be Prince Eric, but…
The Mermaid said:
Oh my, this sounds like my uncle! Uncle L is a bachelor, and got a satellite. Uncle B is his brother-in-Law, with Aunt C his wife. They got one too. Both have the requisite adult channels. Not a big deal.
Uncle B will turn it on and leave it running. I’ve visited his house, and he’ll constantly have it running, just to watch. Not like he’s doing anything but watching. Aunt C apparently puts up with it.
I’ve visited Uncle Ls place with Uncle B there, and he’ll turn it on there and have it running. Talk about not something that makes me comfortable - sitting around watching porn for 8 hours with my two uncles.
Over christmas, he is considerate enough not to run it with my mother or sister in the room. But he’ll be manning the remote, and they’ll go in the other room, and click he’s got to check in and see what’s running that moment.
Regarding your dilemma, perhaps the tack you’ve taken is a little strong. Mostly I think the point for you is that you don’t want to drop everything to satisfy his desires - such as the phone conversations. That’s really the issue.
Also, as malkavia said, hints aren’t the way to go. A direct conversation on the topic, explaining why it makes you uncomfortable or why it’s unreasonable is the best method.
Yeah, that occurred to me after I made the post, but still those words do put one in mind of what’s going on during the scenes that the cheesy background music soundtracks, without actually directly naming the, um, act.
Let’s give The Mermaid the award for creating the First New Euphemism For Sex Of The Third Millenium!!!
bow wow chicka chicka boom boom…
bow wow chicka chicka boom boom…
bow wow chicka chicka boom boom…
bow wow chicka chicka boom boom…
bow wow chicka chicka boom boom…
I believe I have, after years of research, perfected the quintessential method for M.W.U.D. (Morning Wood Urine Displacement). However, be advised that this may not work for you unless you are as short as I am.
With proper foot placement, you can simply bend over, thus pointing the “implement” in the proper direction. Plus, with the right kind of toilet tank, you can rest your forehead on the back, and get a few more minutes of sleep at the same time.
No need to thank me, just as long as I know I’ve made my little contribution to society.
I’ll take it.(see sig)