Great Post, Munch. Looking over your comments, I feel a bit better about my team, and I think you made some great points.
Here, for what it is worth, is my analysis. Read… and be awed:
Seeing as how Draft Day is my favorite day of the fantasy football season, I thought I’d put together a nice little, scratch that, huge piece rating everyone’s team. It’s almost as fun as smack talking, which, as it appears from my team this year, I will not have much opportunity to do.
Before I start, I’d like to say I really enjoyed the draft and it was so sweet that everybody could make it. I had a blast, and I do look forward to this season and this league. I hope nobody takes me too seriously and everybody gets involved.
That being said, let’s begin the critique:
Rhinosaurs
The sweetest word for neuroman these days is DEFAULT. He is the default champion of the league after the unfortunate retirement of mouthbreather. For those who are concerned, mouthbreather is currently touring with Lenny Kravitz and has plans to spend the next year in Asia “smoking as much pot as humanly possible.” To aid neuro in his quest for a repeat, the rhinosaurs had the first pick of the draft and to absolutely noone’s surprise, took Priest Holmes. And, this season, he is going to live or die by that pick. He forsook running back depth, instead going for young talented wide receivers. It’s a gamble, but, if Priest remains Priest, may pay off nicely. All in all, a good team that will be severely hurt if they lose one guy.
Best Pick: Priest Holmes. I also liked getting Brady in the 5th round.
Worst Pick: Having a roster with only 3 running backs.
Overall Grade: B-, with one injury away from D.
Baltimore Weirdos
Weirddave won my undying admiration by picking up Matt Schobel in the 16th round. Matt Schobel has Tony Gonzalez written all over him… if he’s wearing a Tony Gonzalez replica jersey that is. I really liked the Weirdo’s first three and his last four picks. Getting an outstanding qb, rb combination and a nice wr was great, and picking up Terrell, Longwell, and Bledsoe in the late rounds will payoff nicely for this team. However, the homer picks in rounds 4 and 5 had me shaking my head. Not that the Ravens D and Heap aren’t good selections, but it was very early and the Weirdos will be stuck for at second rb and a second wr. This lack of solid depth will hurt this team.
Best Pick: Terrell and Bledsoe. And, of course, LT.
Worst Pick: Ravens D in the fourth round.
Overall Grade: C+. If William Green pans out (which I’m not sold on) a B+.
Fourth And Nineteen
Having to pick 13th this year, I have a new found respect for Wilson’s drafting prowess last year. Now Wilson has to deal with the expectations that come with the pressure of picking 3rd. And I think he handled it very well. Although I would have gone Ahman or Portis over Deuce, it’s a matter of taste. I had Deuce last year and he helped me to third place, so I guess I can’t complain. Overall, I really like this team and expect them to do well. He’s got an outstanding crew of running backs (IF Suggs is healthy), and some up and coming WR’s (he hopes). He’ll need one of his young WR crew to step up in order to win it all, but he’s in really good shape.
Best Pick: I’m tempted to say Chris Brown, because he’s looked awfully good this preseason. He may well be a stud.
Worst Pick: I’m tempted to say Chris Brown. Grabbing him while Terrell Owens and Derrick Mason were still on the board had me scratching my head. Especially because I wanted him to fall to me. As you can tell, I’m a very complex, conflicted guy. It’s my cross to bear.
Overall Grade: A-
T-Rex
First, a shout out to the commish for pulling this thing together. Well done, Steelerphan. I will never, ever make a comment about you singing show tunes in a thong again.
As far as the draft goes, T-Rex drafted like he was singing show tunes in a thong. DAMMIT, I did it again. Shit, I’m sorry. Won’t happen again.
In all seriousness, I really like this team, and I think they are one of the best so far. Steelerphan has a fantastic starting lineup, with the Green boys, Ward, and Garner. You really can’t hope for much more in a 14 player league. With the exception of Lelie, however, I was not impressed with the later round picks. Calico is hurt and no sure thing anyway, Hearst is coming off an injury and may be 3rd string, and Zero-way, Hall, and Testaverde are just sad. Maybe he stayed up to late the night before singing show tunes in a thong. FUCK!!!, I gotta stop that. I’m sorry.
Best Pick: The first five rounds. All good, solid picks. I also like Kevin Johnson.
Worst Pick: Hearst in the 7th round. Way too early and a lot better players were available. Perhaps you were singing sho… AHA. I caught myself that time.
Overall: A-. With the thong… oh crap, forget it.
Mundi’s Morning Blue
Nice to have Spiritus back into football season at the SDMB. Welcome back. Your dreams were your ticket out… Why yes, I did spend too much of my childhood watching television, why do you ask?
Mundi sacrificed one position for the betterment of all positions. Very Spock-like in it’s logic. Now that I’ve done a 14 team draft (this was my first, and you all were definitely not gentle), I may agree with his theory. While possibly weak at WR, Mundi has a solid core of running backs, a consistent QB, a great D, and THE TE. You could do worse than Burress, Meshaun, Givens, Rice and Gage as WR, but, in my opinion, Mundi will be hard pressed to get much of anything out of that position. Still, I don’t know enough to say whether the plan will work.
Best Pick: Warrick Dunn in the 7th round. He’s not much in scoring leagues, but he’s a fine flex player. I also like Favre in the 5th.
Worst Pick: Keyshaun Johnson. Mouth over matter. With the possible exception of Michael Vick, he could be the most overrated player in the history of the game. In addition, passing on Owens to grab Gonzo was not the best move.
Overall: B-.
Bithlo Mullet Revival
Furt gets the “Smack yourself in the face with the palm of your hand” award for picking Marcel Shipp. And, since I’m feeling generous, I’ll also give him a sturdy walker to help with his aging running back corp. Dillon and George are mentioned along with Methusaleh in the Bible, but maybe they do have something left in the tank. Maybe. Overall, a fantastic QB, solid WR’s and one brain cramp make this a middle of the road team.
Best Pick: Peter Warrick in the 7th round. I project nice things for him, but I’ve been wrong before. Grabbing Freddie Mitchell in the last round was genius also.
Worst Pick: Marcel Shipp.
Overall: C. A perfectly average team that will rely heavily on the arm of Peyton Manning.
Pentium None
Another team that may live or die with one pick. And that one pick is coming off an injury, is in a new system, has thrown only 12 passes this preseason, has a woeful 41.7% completion percentage, has no chemistry with his receivers, and goes by the name Steelerphan singing show tune… NO!, I mean Michael Vick. As you could probably guess, I’m not sold on the guy. But if he explodes, he’ll make this team one of the top teams in the league. Other than Vick, a very solid draft that created a solid team to beat.
Best Pick: All of them in the 5th through 9th rounds. I love Charles Rogers, Wheatley is a starting rb, Crumpler is a top 5 TE, Gardner could be on the brink of something great, and Bettis is an OK backup. These solid, great value picks in the middle rounds will greatly help this team.
Worst Pick: Nate Burleson in the 13th. You stole him from me your mother fucker, and you will pay. Oh, and that Vick guy.
Overall: Surprising solid team that, if Vick lives up to the hype, can contend. B+.
Omni’s Omnipotents
Two words: Me likey! From top to bottom, a great draft by Omni. Hopefully, he’ll find some way during the season to fuck it up, but for drafting from the 8 spot, he did very well. I could just picture him drooling all over his keyboard as Shaun Alexander fell to him, only to be followed up by Domanick Davis falling to him…then Darrell Jackson falling to him… then Julius Jones falling to him…then Peerless Price falling to him. Lucky fucker. And the team to beat.
Best Pick: Almost every single mother fucking one of them.
Worst Pick: Find me one. Go ahead, find me one.
Overall: A. Outstanding. Of course, my raves may be just the kiss of death he needs.
Balls (Chitwood)
Mmmmmmm. Chitwood balls. Now I’m hungry. Another drafter who sacrificed one position to build a very good team. Going for quantity over quality at the QB position, in this kind of league, may be a problem, but despite that, Chitwood put together a very talented team. T.O. just fell to him (and I think he’ll make all those owners regret it), and getting Edge and Henry as starters will make this team a contender. I just don’t want to be there on Sunday morning as Chitwood scratches his head (and other assorted bodily parts), and tries to figure out who to start Carr, Brunell, or Gannon.
Best Pick: T.O in the third round. A top 5 wide receiver.
Worst Pick: Waiting on a QB.
Overall: B+. We’ll see how the QB carousel works week to week.
New York Fan Boys
Never in the history of fantasy football has there been a more fitting, more apropos team name. Some mind boggling choices to chase players on the New York teams left me stunned. Here are some things that suck about New York: their flat, cardboard pizza, traffic, their conceited attitude, and now, the New York Fan Boys. I enjoy an occassional homer pick, but one after another does not a good draft make. It may be a long season for Ellis Dee.
Best Pick: I think Dayne and Jordan could have good years this year.
Worst Pick: Pennington in the first, S. Moss in the second, CuMar in the third…the list goes on and on.
Overall: D-. Which hurts cause I have Pennington as my QB in one of my money leagues, so he better do well.
Falcon Twists
Munch, just like Omni, had to take his computer for cleaning today because of all the drool of players who fell to him. Drug charges and the fact that not many (read none) running backs reproduce great seasons after 2,000+ yards rushing, make Jamal Lewis a risk, but getting him at 11 was the best pick of the draft. And to get Barlow on the way back makes this team a tough one. Add Thomas Jones, Laverneus Coles, and Mark Bulger, and this team looks fantastic, and a team that could weather a storm. The only weakness is at #2 wr, which is not a bad weakness to have.
Best Pick: Jamal Lewis. And most of the other ones for that matter. Getting 3 running backs should have cost him more dearly in the other positions, but it didn’t.
Worst Pick: Deshaun Foster. Letting Price, Fitzgerald, Williams, and other good wr go by to get a fourth running back who, even when healthy and good, won’t get the goalline carries, was a reach.
Overall: A-. A tough team to beat.
Derier Extrodinaire
You m… f… c… festering, pile of s… … c… f… I hope you rot in eternal hell, tormented by the looped voice of Rosanne Barr singing the national anthem. If I ever find you, I’m going to beat the ever living tar out of you, kidnap you, and have the names Marvin Harrison, Lamar Gordon, Dallas Defense, and Rashaun Woods tattooed on your face you robbing piece of crap. Every effin time I hoped a guy would fall to me, you scooped him. My team could suck this year because of you, and next year, when I’m kicking your lily-livered ass up and down the fantasy football street, I want you to remember this day.
Ahem.
Best Pick: Lamar Gordon. A starting running back on a run first team in the 7th round? Fuck you.
Worst Pick: Jake Delhomme in the 6th round. Great leader…not a great fantasy point scorer.
Overall: B. And Fuck you.
Hamlet To Be Named Later
Let me bend your ear for a second. Indulge me. I’ve never done a 14 person draft before, and I was surprised at how quickly talent disappears. In every single draft I’ve ever done in the last 10 years, I’ve had at least one guy I liked fall to me, or I avoided getting scooped all the time. This was, without a doubt, the worst draft, luck wise, I’ve ever had. Not that I don’t kinda-sorta like my team, but picking 13th blows, and I couldn’t get a guy to fall to me for the life of me. Every time it came for me to pick, my queue was empty and I was scrambling for a choice.
Thanks, I needed to get that out.
Overall, I like my team OK, but I can also see it going to crap in a second. I’ll need to get lucky on one or two of my late round picks to really compete, but stranger things have happened. Here’s hoping it’s a strange season. You know what would be strange? If Marshall Faulk stayed frickin healthy.
Best Pick: I like almost all of the picks, but none of them stand out as “Oh My God” fantastic picks. I liked getting Eric Parker in the 15th round, and I expect great things from Moulds and Culpepper.
Worst Pick: Vanderjadt. Yeah, I’m that guy who picked a fucking kicker a round before anybody else. In my defense, I had queued up Lamont Jordan, Lamar Gordon, Brandon Lloyd, Bucs D, and Warrick Dunn and went to check on the wife and kids. I figured that there would be no fucking way I couldn’t get at least one of those guys. Figures.
Overall: C+. A very angry, unlucky, and sad C.
Varlos zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Kudos on putting together a servicable team picking from the 14th hole. Other than scooping me on Kevin Jones, I think the team is as good as it can be from there. Brooks is a feast or famine quarterback, as is Freddie, Javon Walker, and, I suspect, Kevin Jones, so there may be some pretty awful weeks, but there will also be some brilliant ones for this team. If varlos gets into the playoffs and can get lucky, they could win it all. Of course, that’s true for everyone in the league, but take your victories where you can.
Best Pick: Moe Williams in the 8th round. He’s a guy I forgot about. But with Bennett’s injuries and Onterrio’s drug problems, Moe will be a guy who can really produce, depending on the week. Not bad for the 8th round.
Worst Pick: Travis Minor. There are one-legged midgets who fall down who have a higher yard per carry average. I’m also leery of Kellen Winslow being all hype and no points.
Overall: C+.
So, to recap for those who do not enjoy in depth analysis and humorous comments intersperced therein, here’s who I think have the best shot of winning this damn league. I’ve ranked it from best to worst, according to the traditional football measure: the Brady Family:
Marcia:
Omni’s Omnipotents
Falcon Twists (Munch)
Greg, when he was Groovy:
T-Rex
Wilson’s 4th and 19
Mike and Carol:
Pentium None
Rhinosaurs
Mundi’s Morning Blue
Balls (Chitwood)
Derier Extrodinaire (oh, and Fuck You!)
Jan:
Baltimore Weirdos
BithloMulletRevival
HamletToBeNamedLater
Varloszzzzzz
Oliver:
New York Fanboys
Well, there you have it. Any comments, huzzah’s, or complaints are very much appreciated.
