Or at least one who was sober!
Oh my yes, dear, you are indeed a princess. We can tell by the way you look through everyone as you gaze around the public venue for this movie, and by the way you plunked your high-rise lawn chair down in front of us without so much as a backward glance to see if you were blocking someone’s view. Trust me, sweetheart: you’re not half as sexy as you seem to think you are. You’re just another rude asshole who will hopefully get her comeupance some day.
There were any number of people who used to do that at Shakespeare in the Park here, Chefguy - everyone was on blankets on the ground, and a bunch of wankers would plunk their lawnchairs down right in front of everyone. They’ve moved the lawnchairs to the back of the crowd now - we bring our lawnchairs and sit at the back and everyone is happy.
ETA: I forgot the finishing touch on my last rant - the morons who don’t know how to RSVP or come to dinners in a restaurant also didn’t bring a single thing for their two 6-9 year old kids to do while the adults talked and ate for three hours.
At paid events, nobody with a full-sized chair is allowed to sit anywhere but in the rear. Everyone else must have stadium seats or a blanket. Public events are, of course, subject to the whims of concertards and smoketards.
I have to keep a doctor’s note on hand for my daughter because of this. She gets allergic conjunctivitis once or twice a year and sometimes develops viral conjunctivitis after an upper respiratory infection. It’s aggravating trying to pin her down long enough to get the goo out of her eyes. She’s fairly allergic in general - gets big welt-y hives once every 1-2 weeks for no apparent reason. They don’t bother her, but sometimes they’re gigantic enough it looks like we’ve been beating her or they’re all over and she looks like she has the chicken pox.
My rant: I’m watching Man vs. Food. A more disgusting show I have yet to see. What the fuck is the point of this, other than to make viewers sick and the host have a heart attack?
Oh. You’re not supposed to fucking eat cucumber skin. Apparently every other goddamn, motherfucking cucumber I’ve ever eaten has been burpless. But this wonderful, delicious, organic cucumber from the farmer’s market? No. This one is not burpless.
My stomach wants to fucking die now.
I’m here at the shop, sunday afternoon finishing off a “hot” job for delivery tomorrow morning. I’m kind of pissed that I’m here, but I’m not ranting about that.
There is one single room in this whole shop that has an air conditioner. One cool room. My little dog, she knows to go in there for her afternoon nap.
My BIG dog just decided it was nap time, she’s over there scratching at the door trying to get into the cool room.
Here’s the rant, Instead of opening the door for her, I’m here at my desk trying to explain to the big dog how she needs opposable thumbs. Explaining to her all the ways her life would be better… If she just grew a pair… of opposable thumbs.
I can’t believe how stupid I am. What a waste of time.
I guess I can’t wear short skirts and dresses anymore. I was wearing one today, and my 12 year-old son said, “Is that what you’re wearing?” Which, as we all know, is code for “Please god tell me you’re not leaving the house in that!!” Then he said, “Sometimes women wear things that are too short for them.” I replied, “I can wear leggings under it.” He said, “No.”
NOOOO!!! You are very smart, smart enough to be trained!
Yesterday, I slept in. Lucky wanted his breakfast at 8:45 and squalled in my face. Of course I staggered into the kitchen and gave him his gooshy food.
Today, Lucky thought he wanted breakfast at 6. Of course, I did what a proper pet owner would do…so got up and fed him gooshy food. I sure showed him :smack:
Just another reason to not have kids. They are honest. They will tell you that its not the jeans that make your butt look fat.
A “good eating” guide for guys like me with a 3500+ kcal rest metabolism and a taste for ultra-spicy food (and lots of it)?
FUCK!!! the truth hurts. Shes’ looking at me like I’m Bush Jr. Like I’m the fucking retard that can’ t open the door or eat a pretzel. Listen there puppy, I’ve got thumbs, I can open doors, write letters and drive. The only thing you can do is lick your genitals.
What’s even worse, I might actually give up my thumbs, for the ability to lick my genitals. Seems like a lot more fun than having the ability to “pick stuff up”.
Well, he just gave you some very important information - when you want to embarrass him for whatever reason in the future, you know exactly how to do it now. 
Cousin, you used to be a very bright and thoughtful young lady. How in the hell could you have selected a man who is such a bigot, and a sexist pig to boot?
Oh yeah, with his older brothers I used to pretend that I didn’t know that my shirt wasn’t a dress and get ready to leave the house with them. Hilarity ensued!
Dear God:
I have contacted an agency which manages apartments here in Madrid and whose buildings include some with reasonable rates and decent commutes to my current job (unlike those others with the"tourist rates"); no response. I also contacted several individuals who had small flats for rent close to work. Only one responded, and I’m seeing the place today.
Please let it be OK, because last week I was alone in the flat and it was fine, but the first thing my coworker/flatmate did when she arrived was close everything up (except my window, but only because she didn’t realize it was open). I’m in Madrid. It’s August. This flat does not have a/c. I don’t want to live in a goddamn oven!
Moonli, I’m so, *so *sorry–but I laughed at this. Pretty hard. 
Do you have a spice store anywhere near you? If you’re in Milwaukee, Chicago, Evanston, or Geneva, I’d recommend The Spice House. That’s for dried spices, of course. Fresh ones, have you checked the produce section of your local grocery stores? I find that those usually have little plastic containers of fresh herbs–dunno about bulk, but you’d probably have better luck at a local organic grocer, or a chain one like Whole Foods.
Does his employer have any kind of ethics hotline? It’s possible that they’d allow you to grandfather in an old employee, since your arrangement predates the rule.
Of course they can. Your employer can require all sorts of crazy things of you; and you then have the choice not to work for them. I can especially see this being problematic if the employer is something related to mental health, social services, financial services, etc., where working there could give you access to all kinds of confidential personal information about the clients.
Hahaha, sorry, laughing at someone’s pain again. Do you have anyone else you could trust to get an objective opinion from? He could be right, or he could be overreacting because you’re his mom, and all his friends have been teasing him about you being a MILF (yeah, they’re hitting that age, lucky you).
Hey, Alice, post a pic here and you’ll get a whole bunch of opinions from random strangers! 
Agreed. My husband works at a construction management company that bids on hundreds of millions (if not billions) of dollars of projects in town here annually; I work as an office temp, and actually had an assignment in the City of Calgary bidding office at one point (he wasn’t with the company then). If an assignment like that came up again, it would be negligent of me to not tell them who my husband works for, and they can decide if there is enough separation for me to accept the job. As a temp we’re always expected to keep employer stuff confidential, but the appearance of me being able to tip him about bids would be enough.
I got really tired of sitting on hard chairs in front of the computer and the gaming console, so I waited until one of the office supply stores had a really great sale on desk chairs, and I bought two. They are indeed nicely designed, and they are very very comfy.
Perhaps too comfy. All four Bodoni kitties prefer to sleep in these chairs, above all other places. And I have a hard time moving the cats from the chairs. Although I might start squirting some water on the cats.