I’ve personally been waiting for a “Mark Burnett v. Schrodinger’s Cat” thread. (Actually, I’ve been trying to start one, but I’m just not clever enough to get it right.) It would involve Burnett constantly manipulating the outcome of the cat’s fate in order to maximize ratings.
But if the cat was prepared…
John Doe vs Joe Bloggs
Darth Vader vs Mary Poppins
Lego vs Mechano
intergalactic star ship (star wars) Vs. a Vogon constructor ship.
Enterprise (Picards crew) Vs. Heart of gold.
I especially want to see what happens when Trillion sits on Wesley’s lap and starts to mess with his control panel.
Better yet, I can see Data asking Marvin what its like to have human emotions and Marvin saying "O god its just more dreadful then you can possibly imagine.” Data will insist, so Marvin will say “You really want to know” Data will say “Oh yes” then Marvin will say “Here, pull my finger”
Kikkoman vs Pokeman
On one side you have a very old purveyor of an ancient sauce, on the other, a young bunch of animated creatures trained to fight.
(a guy at work actually came up with this battle of the titans, and it had me in stitches all day)
The Disney Club v’s A printer who once typeset ‘club sandwhich’ on a bar menu.
Pete Best v’s Pete’s Dragon
Tripitaka v’s the Arch-Bishop of Canterbury
Lassie vs. Skippy the Bush Kangaroo.
The crew of Battle of the Planets vs. the Scoobies from Buffy.
Rambo vs. Joseph Stalin.
As for Vader vs. Poppins: she would constantly pressurise him to take his medicine with choruses of “A Spoonful of Sugar”, until she finally manages to pull his mask off, at which point he of course dies.
Fenway Park’s Green Monster vs. The Incredible Hulk
The battle of the big green things.
Dr. Christiaan Barnard vs. Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman
What Dr. Barnard lacked in leather-clad male companions, he made up for in groundbreaking transplant surgery. A close contest, this one.
That’s the ultimate.
McDonalds vs. Spongebob Squarepants
SB: Aaahh! Mr. Krabs! Mr. Krabs! Someone stole your secret patty recipe!! Ahhh!
Mr.K: Arrrr arr arr arrrr. Its the hamburglar! Quickly Spongebob, get him! Arr arr arr
Hamburglar: Robble robble
SB: Mr. Krabs! Mr. Krabs! Mr. Krabs! I got him! The secret patty recipe is safe!
Mr. K: Arr arr arr. Good work Spongebob. Those McDonald’s boys are slick bunch. They’ll stop at nothing to get our secret patty recipe. And that big yellow guy is the worst. Don’t let his charmin’ smile fool you Spongebob! He’ll steals our recipe and takes our money! Arrrrr
SB: Don’t worry Mr. Krabs. I’m ready for anything. I’m ready! I’m ready! I’m ready!
Emperor Palpatine vs Dr. Evil
Bugs Bunny vs Wrasslor (Dexter’s Lab)
Oh, I know who would win … I just wanna see how it goes down! 
Jimmy Neutron vs MiniMe
Hitler vs Saddam
Can you say “Celebrity Death Match”?
I want to hear that one.
refusal, I’d first put up a Battle of the Network Stars v. Battle of the Planets crew.
My Penis vs. My Hand
Mars vs. Ares, Athena vs. Minerva, Zeus vs. Jupiter, etc.
The Haves vs. The Have Nots
Feeding a Cold vs. Starving a Fever
Walt Disney’s Lawyers vs. Microsoft’s Lawyers
George Lucas vs. Steven Spielberg in the Celebrety Cage of Death!
[celebrity]
Richard Simmons VS Gene Simmons
Linda Tripp VS Larry King
No, ** Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman vs. Forrest Gump**
Whereas Forrest could be the epicenter of a historical event, and the viewer would find the scene enjoyable and an emotional pick-me-pup, Dr. Quinn could do the same thing and make the viewer want to hurl from the hokiness.
Whenever my wife watched that show, I’d have to leave the room…
RIAA Attourneys vs. 300 annoyed and hungry Bengal Tigers
Ghandi vs Buddha
Dead Kennedys vs Live Kennedys
Arby’s Oven Mitt vs Me with a wood chipper
Captain Kirk & Spock vs the Captain & Tennille
Bugs Bunny vs the Killer Bunny from MP&THG
Bugs Bunny vs the Energizer Bunny
Tony the Tiger vs Tiger Woods
Bob Ross vs. Bob Marley
Death Star Vs. The entire vogon constructor fleet.
Schrodinger’s cat vs. Nostradamus and a guy who can figure out what the hell he’s saying.
Godzilla Vs.Cthulhu.