Right now I am in a corner booth, with a 2 and 5 year old in the next booth (ages guessed). The 2 year old is crawling all over both booths, dumping sugar all over for the waitress to clean up, and yelling the one word (“HI!”) in the loudest voice I can muster. The 5 year old is singing, and yelling at the grill cook that she farted and is sorry it smells so bad. The parents, I think, might be high and ignoring them.
Another table has adults (as in their 40’s or early 50’s) yelling at the one waitress to bring them their food while she’s waiting on another table, 6 Hispanic people who I don’t think speak a single word of English between them, but are pointing very nicely to the menus. This is her one pleasant table right now (she’s basically ignoring me which is fine because she’s known me for years and I don’t need anything), and another table just walked in, this total bitch I work with and her husband.
::sigh::
What I wouldn’t give for a Starbucks, or any other place with wireless internet I could mooch.
Yeah, Waffle House and internets doesn’t sound compatible to me.
Do you have any bookstores in the area? Border’s and Barnes and Noble generally have free internet connection.
I guess libraries wouldn’t help you since you seem to be there after library hours. Well, our library here opens until 8 pm so that might actually work.
Oh wait, are you there for another reason than to just get internet access?
Well, there’s a Super 8 across the street and I’m mooching their internet. There are 10k people in this city, and not a single bookstore (besides Christian bookstores), not a single coffee shop, and it s also a dry county, except for two bars (one of which has wi-fi, but I’m not going to go there a) alone and b) to use the internet. Although the only time I’ve been there was a Saturday night and there weren’t even 10 people there.
I could sit at home, but there wouldn’t be nice ladies to bring me diet coke, and until the ex-bf moves out, I’m trying to spend less time there. He’s gotten all awkward about the break-up, and I really don’t like listening to it all the time.
ETA: anyrose, I am playing on bearforest.com (nsfw) while here. I did say I was in a corner booth.
You are wise to note the people that patronize such franchises as the Waffle House tend to have some pretty serious issues whether they are illegal immigrants or blue collar workers who are trying to fit in with the dregs of society. How did you arrange an investigative report to give us an unbiased treatise on this matter? It seems like you did some serious investigation to learn what goes on with the people that flock to these establishments.
The cell phone angle is definitely stealthy if not a bit of 14-ish girly-girly. If you want to pursue this line of research, I can give you some other hot-spots and many of them won’t even require the stealth of internet messaging to get the communications back to headquarters. I know it sucks to patronize a Waffle House and have to deal with typical Waffle House customers that are very similar to yourself yet different enough to be a curiosity,
Waffle House is the gem of the South! I would LOVE for them to be anywhere I travel. The food is just so, so… delicious! And at any time of the day? 24 hours! It’s wonderful! And so much better than IHOP.
Cell phone nothin’. I brought my Macbook with me. If I’m going to hunch over a cell phone to play on the internet, I’m going to it in a public bathroom while I’m poopin’.
They are on the table!
Also the MMP has gotten tiring! Back in the day it was 2 or 3 pages all week. Now if I don’t check in before noon on Monday, I already have that much to read! I’ll make an effort next week.
Update: It’s shift change time, and the 3rd shift people are here, along with this really attractive guy with a baseball cap and tight Wranglers, someone with a hideous outfit waiting for a to-go order, and a couple at the high bar who keep eyeing me funny. I’m going to go pay my ticket before they change out the register (and Hottie McHunkerson is by the cash register.)
Wow. The worst I’ve had to put up with at a restaurant lately was a little girl who was proudly counting as high as she could go. Aloud. She was up to 247 when I left.
Jesus Christ, who takes a nice laptop with them to go to a Waffle House? The people that go there are already poor enough. Do you just want to sit there and laugh to rub their faces it it? I don’t recall you saying that you ever even ordered anything. Sick. Sick. Sick. It sounds like you staged this whole thing to write an expose on their clientele and broadcast it to the entire world. We don’t know these people. They could be award winning maids or gardeners. Some could be blue collar workers that earned a full scholarship to get their GED. Who are we to say that we are better than an illegal immigrant or a union truck unloader? Well, I know I am but that doesnt apply to everyone else. Can’t we have some tolerance around here?
I can’t tell if this is serious or a whoosh. Fully one-third of the population of this town are students, about a third of those being from the private Christian school across the street who pay more to go to school than I make in a year. I referenced the food I ate (country ham and eggs) in my second post. I also mentioned there are exactly zero other places in this city to go (besides a rarely-patronized bar that I’m not even sure is open on Wednesdays) to hang out. Anyone familiar with my posting history on here would know that I have spent two separate tours of working at this very Waffle House during my time in college. You’ll also note that I didn’t make any comments the apparent poverty of these people, but rather their behavior (or level of physical attractiveness, in one case). Ignoring your screaming, crying, bouncing children is inappropriate in any level of society.
So if your post was facetious, try smilies or try to make it obvious. If not, fuck off, and thanks for thread-shitting my lighthearted rant.
Personally, I LIKE Waffle House food. Great waffles, awesome hash browns (ideally with cheese, ham, onions, tomatoes, jalapeno peppers, AND chili, but hold the mushrooms), and I’m fond of their perfect little bacon egg and cheese wraps too. Oh, and keep the sweet tea coming for me, hon!
Sometimes I am surprised to find out how much it takes to make it obvious that there is parody involved. I try to include clues that are impossible to miss. The thing that made me laugh was the fact that you were sitting at a Waffle House documenting the behavior of the terrible patrons that go there. There was no threadshitting involved and I found your OP amusing. I wasn’t making fun of you although the potential irony could potentially make a great Onion article.
That did NOT occur to me. I’m shocked, I tells ya, shocked!!!
This whole thread has been a complete whoosh on me. I thought he was seriously looking for a place to connect. . . to the internet. . . for good productive purposes like surfing the Dope. How naive I am! :o
