Ahem
WANTED: Energetic, extroverts needed for bachelorette party. Must be willing to disrobe and be ogled by group of intelligent, discerning and probably tipsy women. Special attention to be paid to bride-to-be.
No experience necessary–but some dancing (or form thereof) would be expected.
All body types welcome. Don’t be shy…
Excellent pay and tips.
And for our sisters like andygirl, etc.–any female dancers/strippers welcome also.
Well, actually, my father’s family is from the northern part of Italy. I don’t know that much about it, save for the fact that for some reason we all have blonde hair that turns black as we grow up.
And I don’t have the cool olive skin. Damn my French mother!.. Just kidding.
Gentlemen, I humbly thank you for your interest. You will ALL be considered–and closely, I might add–but I should clarify that whoever applies for this/these positions will miss out on the bachelor party, as both parties will be the same night.
Just wanted to let you know…
Now, everybody turn around…s-l-o-w-l-y.
Unforntunately, the creator chose not to bless me with what would be called a sexy body. They did however give me an abundance of hair.
Only one poor girl, my lovely SO, has the guts to view me naked, and for that I thank her dearly. For some reason she seems to like me naked and next to her. Poor misdirected girl.
Now, I have not surveyed the other females of the board, but I think I can safely speak for them in saying that anyone is welcome. This is virtual, after all…I’m operating under the idea that you can look however you like. Although I’m sure you are all quite pleasing to the eye…
I’m not sure if I’ve described myself lately, but if you need to make a decision, here are the bullet items:
6’3"
215#
Italian-Dutch
Blue-green-grey eyes (piercing and hypnotic)
Former Marine (keeping the haircut)
Former rugby player and long-distance runner (think: endurance)
Much much more, but struuter, hon, you already know that!
Some say I look like Jim Thome (Cleveland Indians first baseman), and most of the people that say that are from Cleveland, so go figure.
Struuter, can I come in or is this supposed to be a surprise. I was kind of hoping that, since the stag party is going on now, I could help with auditions.
OK. I’m going to have to insist that someone start stripping soon. If I don’t see some flesh soon I’m going to have to get back to work, and what kind of fun is that?!?
Come on boys. Show me those pecs. Flex those abs. Shake that ass.