War Games quote

What does General Beringer mean when he says, “I’d piss on a spark plug if I thought it’d do any good!”?

Is pissing on spark plugs dangerous?

Isn’t it like pissing on an electric fence?

Why do you think they call them “spark” plugs?

“I don’t have to take that from you, you fat sack of shit!”

I believe the correct quote was: “I don’t have to take that, you pig-eyed sack of shit.”

Lots of great quotes from that movie. Still one of my all-time favorites.

ETA: OP, you really don’t want to goggle 'piss on a spark plug"! Probably some writer (or perhaps the actor) had heard it before, and just inserted it there. Meaning is pretty clear ("I’ll do just about anything to prevent what’s happening).

The goggles do nothing!

It was one of those made up Southernisms and was ad libbed on set.

It just means that the General would do just about anything to fix the problem at hand (impending nuclear war). It is a humorous reference that suggests something the top-secret nuclear computers at NORAD actually depends on spark plugs. He is telling everyone to try to figure out absolutely any solution.

The internal military fight in the movie was to figure out how much control to give to the computers rather than people because many of the top people don’t really understand how they work.


“After deep consideration, I’ve come to the conclusion your system sucks.”

“Is this real or is it a game?”
“What’s the difference?”