Warning: Personal Rant Ahead.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Okay, I know some of y’all hate these posts, so here’s your chance to hit the ol’ BACK button now. I need to rant somewhere.

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All righty then. Time for a rant on my roommate. She’s a great friend, but it absolutely sucks to live with her. I’ve lived here since November of 1998 with her. And I’m beginning to wonder WHAT I was thinking when I signed the lease for another year.

She has more crap than I can shake a stick at, and insists on keeping boxes for everything. Now, I am not a packrat. I understand some people are, and that’s fine! Just keep it in your own room, not in mine, the living room, the dining room… She’s terrible about paying me for phone/electric bills, and is quite possibily the most passive-agressive person I’ve ever met. She will literally walk through the apartment sighing loudly and slamming doors while looking at me. I ask what’s up. “Nothing.” Fine then…I ain’t asking again. (Note: Her mother died three years ago. I understand she is still upset over this. However, that is NOT a license to act like a bitch.) Honestly, half the time it’s because I’m on the PC. (Which is mine, and I pay for net access. Honestly, she’s lucky I let her use it.) She won’t ask me if she can use something…she’d rather just sit there and seethe.

Final straws: I came back from Christmas vacation on December 30th. Flight back was terrible, getting home was worse. I walk in, and discover there’s 3 weeks worth of shit on our dining room table. Including pots and pans from the kitchen, her coat, her umbrella, and a ton of junk mail. (The kitchen is a whole 'nother rant.) Okay, fine. I walk into my room, where the door has been closed. She put all the empty boxes, bags, and other shit that USED to be in our dining room into my room, all over my bed. This was so her family would think she kept the place up. I just silently bagged it all up and tossed it. That night. She never said a word.

However, the worst happened today. We now have her family’s dog, because her father was mistreating it. This is fine with me. However, Abby ALSO mistreats the dog. I;m sorry…a 15 year old dog is not going to change its behavior. Y’all let it beg for food before…that’s NOT going to change. I don’t mind at all…my dog did the same thing. However…I discovered something tonight. She won’t give the dog any food, but she will place the PLATE on the floor after she’s done for the dog to lick it off. I went ballistic. I told her she was NEVER to do that with my plates again.

So…I’m thinking of finding a new apartment once I find a new job. (Any DC dopers who work for the government care to help me out with that??? :)) Random question though - the lease is in her name, although I signed it as well. If I leave, is that breaking the lease?

And thanks for listening…I know this was REALLY long.

“You are sweet, kind, and considerate… Like a grown up boy scout with tits!” - Brian, aka SDMB’s one and only Satan.

2

Just think long term. In another 2 years, you will look back and laugh at this.
I know. I had idiots for roommates 4 years back. While I dont want to relive it, I certainly smile at how frustrated i was.

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3

Are you already a government worker? What agency? What job series and grade?

I am a contractor, but work side-by-side with the government folks… and I used to date a government personnel specialist, so I’m pretty hip to the civil service stuff.

Certainly I can point you twards job announcements etc…

It depends on what provisions the lease has – but almost certainly ‘yes,’ it’s breaking it. When two people sign a lease, usually they are ‘jointly and severally’ liable for the obligations incurred.

  • Rick
4

Bricker -

I’m in the same position as you, I think. I work for a government contractor. Who is trying to break away from EPA work. So, I don’t have an official grade or anything. Shoot me an email…I’d appreciate any help you could give.

5

Yee-ikes, Falc! It sounds like she’s kind of locked-in-a-box, emotion wise. Putting the stuff in your room was a desperate act.

Sometimes, people get overwhelmed by circumstances out of their control and tend to stall out, and then cling to things.The best thing you could do for her is to tell her how this is no way to live, hopefully opening the emotional doors for her to depth- charge her past and move beyond it. Of course, it ain’t your duty to be her shrink, but it would benefit her to see how her actions affect you.

A passive-aggressive person has a hard time dealing with frustration, so narrows things down in order to cope. To my mind, the best tactic is to be non-confrontational, and express concern for her. Ask questions, and make time to listen. And if you end up moving, spell out to her exactly why. That’s a favor, because otherwise she’s blind to her faults, and won’t get any better.

6

When you leave, be sure to steal the dog. You’d make a better mom for it.

7

When I was in college, I lived with 5 women. we all got on great, except for one girl who did her best to make sure everyone else suffered so she could get her way. She did some pretty mean things when she didn’t.
Eventually, we had had enough, so looking up the internet I came across this little trick on one of those “How to annoy your roommate” lists. We did it for a laugh, and it worked.

this is how it goes:

Start collecting potatoes.keep about 10 in a group in a prominent place in the house. after a while, paint faces on them and give them names of all your friends, and include her as one. Talk to them, Play with them. Build them a cardboard house. after a few weeks of this, start to separate your roommate’s potato from the rest. Make it noticable. After a week of segregating the potato from the others, bake the potato and eat it, jacket and all. when your roommate asks, tell her that the potato didnt fit in with the others.
I know its cruel, but it works and it can be fun playing with the potatoes.

as far as the contract goes, if you can get the approval of the Landlord, you can break your agreement with your roommate.

John Larrigan

“82.35% of all statistics are made up on the spot”–Vic Reeves

8

Hmmm…apartment? I’m thinking having the dog in there at all is breaking the lease.

9

Interesting. All of the apartment I’ve rented only had a lease for the first year, then went month-to-month after that. Good luck getting out of it.

I’ll see if I can find my company’s job listing site and send it to you.

Judges 14:9 - So [Samson] scraped the honey into his hands and went on, eating as he went. When he came to his father and mother, he gave some to them and they ate it; but he did not tell them that he had scraped the honey out of the body of the lion.

10

If she mistreats the dog you should kill her, end of story. Dogs are helpless creatures and mistreating a dog is like beating a baby, especially an old dog. So, eliminate her with prejudice, then get a new roommate, problem solved.

Or you can try making HER life just as miserable… (though that’s sort of petty and childish, especially if she has someproblems)

Elelle’s right. Take the dog with you when you go.

How about this: get her a boyfriend to latch onto and obsess over, sign the lease over to him, they live together, you’re home free (and homeless for a while, maybe).

I sold my soul to Satan for a dollar. I got it in the mail.

11

Falcon, I hate your roommate. I wish I had some words of wisdom. Only had one roommate, in a college dorm and I was the “bad” roomie.

As far as getting a federal job in D.C., check out this website: http://www.usajobs.opm.gov/a.htm

Easy breezy!

12

Monty - you can have a pet if you pay $250 and $30 extra per month. Of course, roomie refuses to do this.

And Michelle…if I could take the dog, I would. I’m sorry, anyone who KICKS a dog for following them into the kitchen is a bitch. Pure and simple. This is partially why I keep putting off getting a cat.

13

Your roommate and my step -son are clones. He’s 18 and everything he touches he either breaks or gets it filthy. I think it would literally kill him to take out the garbage. He has slowly but surely set about destroying the home we live in and the bitch of it is, it’s unintentional. Needless to say it’s been been very frustrating thus far.

14

Well, yeah, Falcon. I mean sheesh. Duh!

If you’d get married, you wouldn’t have these problems. You’d be living in a bungalow with a white picket fence and lace curtains, and you’d be waving goodbye to hubby when he goes to work, maybe gossip with the neighbour for a spell, then go in and do the housework wearing your pearls and a cocktail dress.

Later on, you’d put the kids in the ststion wagon and take the boy to Little Leagues and the girl to ballet class.

Your husband’s not home yet because he’s having an affair with his…

::Why do I have to ruin everything?::

When the pin is pulled, Mr.Grenade is no longer our friend.

15

Falcon - rat on her to the landlord, about the dog. Then the landlord might kick you both out of there. You move in with somebody else, or find a place of your own (taking the dog if at all possible, of course). One problem out of two solved. (Good luck with the job hunt, and definitely look at the OPM site.)

Hey, rat on her to the SPCA, too. Anyone who kicks a dog that old doesn’t deserve to be treated with kid gloves. :mad:

I like the potato idea, too, though I’ve never tried it.

16

elelle:

Or, maybe she’s just a slob. Some of us are that way. (Hey, it multiplies when you’re not looking.)

Falcon:

And that’s a problem because…?

17

Falcon, don’t do anything that will get you thrown out of your apt. This will go on your rental history and make it hard for you to find a new place to live.

if she kicks the dog, report her to animal services. I’m not kidding. There is no way I would watch anyone do that to an animal and let them get away with it. Actually, if I saw her kick her dog, I’d knock her into next week and wouldn’t have to worry about calling animal services.

18

Irishman - PLEASE tell me you are kidding. I love animals, but I’m sorry…eating on a plate (even after it’s been washed) where a dog has licked it clean is NOT my idea of a good time. (And we also have no dishwasher now, so I’m not too confident of her cleaning skills.)

Michelle - the only reason I haven’t reported her is because I don’t know what they’d do to the dog. As bad as Abby treats her, her father was worse. Her father LEFT the dog in an abandoned house, and only went in to check it once a day. I’m kinda scared they’d send the dog back to him.

And thanks to everyone who’s responded…except for Wally. Yo Wally! :stuck_out_tongue:

19

Falcon, if you report the dog’s circumstances to Animal Serives they will probably take the dog away from her and her family. Try to find someone who would want the dog, maybe they will let who you chose have the dog. Even if she has to go to their shelter for a while, it is better than living with someone who abuses her. You might be able to protect the dog by feeding it properly, but unless you are willing to confront your roommate about the physical abuse, you gotta do something.

20

Michelle - thanks. I’m going to confront her about it…about a lot of things, really. I like having the dog around, so I’m going to make one more effort to break through to Abby…after that, I’m calling someone.