Was I being hit on and I missed it?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

There was another thread recently where someone asked something like this, and for the life of me I can’t find it by searching. So I start anew.

I’m usually pretty good at spotting this, except when I’m not. I guess that makes me a typical male in some respects.

Yesterday, I took a half-day to get the car worked on. Because it was going to take a few hours, and there’s a mall nearby, I asked the dealer to drop me and pick me up so I could do soome last minute shopping.

When the car’s done, they call and we arrange a place for me to wait for the porter to get me. Now, it was about 5 degrees out yesterday, damn cold. I’m standing in the vestibule, waiting to get picked up, between two sets of doors watching people come and go.

I watch a woman, very attractive in a Lorelei from Gilmore Girls kind of way, about mid 30’s, nicely dressed though not nearly warm enough - just one of those loose thin wool coats, as she runs from her car to the entrance. Her arms are full of bags so, being not quite a complete jerk, I step up and hold a door for her.

She runs in, thanks me, and stops to adjust her bags and take off her hat. I mumble something about it being cold (clever guy huh?) and she says:

“Yes it is, thanks for getting the door. You know, you standing here, you ought to start selling nice warm hugs to frozen women like me when we come in”

stammer and laugh < me

“No, really, I bet you’re a great hugger, I know you’d warm me up”

repeat stammer and laugh

She laughs, grabs my arm, gives me a nice squeeze and goes away.

She wanted me right?

2

Other people will probably come along and say for sure, but it could be either way. Depending on my mood, I’ve said playful things like this, flirting but not really coming on to a guy. And I’ve said the equivalant thing when hitting on a guy, too.

I’ve seen your pic. You’re not too bad on the eyes…she might have wanted a special hug. :wink:

3

I agree. It was a flirt; not a hit.

4

I’ve been married since I was 22, so I might not be a great judge of this, but it sounds to me like she was hitting on you :confused: I mean, she said “no, seriously…” after you just giggled when she could’ve just walked away.

5

Did you happen to take note if there was seventies porn music getting piped into the vestibule?

It’s between hit on and hard flirt. You should have hugged her to see if she was cold and/or happy to see you.

6

Probably a really hard flirt. I think if she’d been hitting on you she would have hugged you just to prove her point.

Then again, I’m not the expert here by far. See, once in a bar this guy was talking to me and ever so gently squeezing my butt (I thought I felt something back there!) but I was oblivious to it the whole time. When he left, a friend of mine who was standing there asked me what was wrong with me, letting a totally hot man who was obviously coming on to me get away. My comment was: “He was? I didn’t notice him hitting on me.”

The moral of this little tale?

Do not take advice from me in these matters. :smiley:

7

So noted. :smiley:

I think I actually prefer to think of it as a firm flirt, left open to await my response. Could have gone somewhere, but since I didn’t hit the bait, it didn’t.

But, damn. Ya know?

8

Good thing you’re no longer addled. :smiley:

9

Which is why dealing with women is so easy.

10

Nah, I left addled and moved on to senility several years ago. Ok, maybe it’s just overall cluelessness rather than senility. Still, I swear, fate could drop a man who is the composite of all I think is hot, naked right into my lap and I probably still wouldn’t notice. I am hopeless!

Then again, there is ACBG, so maybe I did get one right. :smiley:

11

I had no idea there was, in some people’s minds, a difference between flirting and being hit on. I’m still trying to wrap my head around that one.

Whenever I’m being flirted with, I assume I’m being hit on. I damn sure am hitting on a woman when I flirt, or when I flirt back. If I’m not interested I tend not to notice until after the fact.

12

I would have said the moral is that swampbear shouldn’t drink, because it goes straight to his butt.

13

Got an email from my ex-g/f. The one who left me for another woman. A guy came into her office who had the same first, middle and last names as I. And he had a motorcycle helmet. In her email she said that she has thought about me every day for the last ten years, and ‘[the] biggest mistake of my life was not marrying you, that’s the God’s honest truth.’ Oh, and women are weird and she’s given up on them.

14

…And your response was…?

15

I simply don’t understand flirting for flirting’s sake. You either want it or you don’t.

(This is hypothetical due to the fact I’m married and not cheating)

If I think someone’s attractive, I let them know in no uncertain terms that they are attractive and that I intend to act on that attraction. If they decline, so be it; I walk away. No wishy-washy horseshit. I’m always hearing people complain about being uncertain about someone else’s feelings. Cut the fucking bullshit and get right to the point. Reject me if you want, but you sure as hell won’t be up a 3am in some bleeding chatroom wondering if I’m into you or not, and vice versa. Sheesh!

16

See, that’s NOT flirting. That’s desperation hitting on you. Nothing coy about that. Whatchoo gonna do, **Johnny?**Hit that? Or has she lost her L.A. privileges?

17

I have the same problem with Mexican food.

18

In the movies they always make everything look so easy! Just a few words and meaningful glances and the two people know they’re meant for each other and their new lives begin.

Johnny L.A., I bet you agree with her about the wierdness of women, don’t you?

The truth is, we humans are all weird. On so many levels.

19

Gah – you guys are all such guys.

It is possible – and, indeed, a lot of fun – to flirt with someone you’re not hitting on. Sometimes a bit of playful conversation that leaves you both walking away smiling is just the thing to cheer up an otherwise blah day.

(Yeah, Johnny L.A., whatcha gonna do? Frankly, if you two aren’t going to get back together – and, honestly, I have no opinion about the wisdom or lack thereof of such a plan – you should ask her to stop making these comments because they’re driving you and your entire message-board community of pals totally batshit.)

20

Sorry, should have said, I too think it’s just a flirt, which could turn into a ‘hit’ if the right response had been achieved.

An Arky, I’m curious, exactly what would you say to indicate your interest in another person?