Water will no longer taste like water.

In My Humble Opinion (IMHO)
#1

You’ve been cursed. Water will still be water, but it will never taste anything like water again for as long as you live. But, you get to choose the flavor, as long as it’s nothing that already tastes close to water, like tonic or water with lemon.

It could be a plus, but if you choose something too out there, you could get sick of it. For instance, who wants a cold glass of whisky after a 5k? It wouldn’t have any effects of booze, just the taste. Ditto for cooking. If you make soup with water, it’ll taste like soup made with Gatorade (or whatever) to you, but fine for everyone else. Though I guess you could use stock.

#2

Interesting topic/username intersection here.

Question: is mouth feel also affected?

#3

Tea.

#4

Pepsi. It’s still water, so it’ll be fine in almost everything. I’ll stick to cream soups and put the vodka in the freezer so I don’t have to pour it over ice. I think pasta and rice will be the tough ones to deal with.

Does the water already in meat and vegatables taste different too?

#5

Pussy.

(Well, someone was going to say it!)
Actually, I think tomato juice would work for me. Cooking wouldn’t be much of an issue.

#6

I choose death.

I love water too much to lose its various subtle watery tastes. Water with something, which is basically just every drink, just doesn’t satisfy me in the same way. But tea (though, which kind of tea???) was a hell of an answer.

#7

My first thought.

#8

Minute Maid light lemonade. Since I already drink it by the truckload, first thing in the morning, last thing at night, and frequently in between, I don’t think I would sense much of a difference.

#9

Yes. Full on sensory swap. If it’s carbonated, you’ll swear you feel fizzy bubbles. Hard liquor with have the same burn or warmth. It’s all imaginary though. There’s no carbonation to cause burps, and there’s no additional calories or anything.

#10

My first thought was wine, but I’ll behave - guava or mango juice.

#11

Jesus Christ.

I’m not clear on the “stock” comment: if you made soup from stock, wouldn’t the water that the stock was made from affect the flavor?

I was gonna choose Budweiser, but then I noticed it couldn’t be anything that tasted like water. So I think I’d choose a not-terribly-hoppy pale ale, opting basically for a malty flavor to be added to everything.

#12

Bacon.

#13

I’d also go with a light lemonade. It’s always refreshing, and won’t be too overpowering to cook with.

I’d probably switch from coffee to tea though.

#14

Hee. Not sure who was the clever one here…you or scootergirl.

#15

I’d be fine if water tastes like beer. Actually can it taste like 3 beers? That’s my favorite.

#16

If you join in we can have a trinity, but I wanna be the ghost.

#17

Seltzer. It’s what I drink most of now anyway.

#18

[Izzard]Holy Ghoooost… Holy GhooooOOOOost.[/Izzard]

And I third/fourth the vote for tea, brewed weak.

#19

Coffee. I can drink it hot or cold, it makes a tolerable cooking ingredient, and—well, caffeine.

#20

I’d have to start eating just whole foods or something, 'cause I’d choose Diet Pepsi, since that’s what I live on anyway. But everything else being affected by it? Holy shit that’s, like, everything.
Couldn’t do it. Couldn’t cook. Couldn’t drink anything else, 'cause even milk would taste different.

So…yuck!!

I absolutely detest water, do not drink it. People don’t believe me when I say this, but I. do. not. drink. water. period. The closest I get is ice in my diet pepsi. So, for drinks alone, I’d be in heaven if this happened, and considerably healthier, I imagine. But no cooking? No…nothing? Yuck!

Raw vegetable diet for me, I guess.