She is Bi-Polar (manic-depressive) and this whole wedding has tipped her into an “episode.” It started about a week and a half ago. I told my dad, but he can’t do anything about it. Since she is an adult, she makes her own choices. My dad is legally left out of her mental decisions. He finally had her start taking medicine a few days ago by threatening to leave her if she didn’t. But it wasn’t soon enough, and she didn’t have the proper meds. Her doctor retired a year ago and she went to a new one with out her records…
But now she is the mental ward in Orlando and it doesn’t look like she id getting put in time for the wedding on Saterday. She will never forgive me, because she never remembers how sick she gets. She will say we locked her up again and didn’t let her go to the wedding.
I cried all this morning about it. She had also been calling up my out of town reletives and telling them that my dad has been abusing her and that she is not going to the wedding. Thus, they shouldn’t have to come down for it. A lot of them didn’t know she was like this at times. My uncle almost came down to Florida to take her away.
Hey. You have my sympathies. I’m manic-depressive. It’s a tough tough illness for friends and relatives to live with. You did the right thing. Sometimes people don’t understand that you are trying to help them. Again, you have my sympathy.
I can kind of relate to you, Tubagirl. My sister is kind of messed up and has acused my dad of beating and raping her in order to move in with a foster family. She also told people that my family is in a cult where we worship goats and sacrifice humans. She ran away 7 weeks ago for the 5th time. She has put my family through so much. Its really tough when family members have problems like that.
Im really sorry to hear that tuba. Here’s hoping that your mom’s meds get settled soon and she is home again. One day she will realize you were helping not hurting her.
Jeez, hon, I am so sorry to hear about your mom.Though I’m sure its cold comfort, I agree with the others that you’ve done the best thing for her.And probably for you, too.Its good that she has folks that love her enough to do the hard things.
Here’s some positive, happy vibes being sent your way from South Texas.
My stepmom just got out. She stopped taking her medicine, gave away $26,000 to religious-type people, and then blamed me for trying to take control of her finances (I live 1500 miles away and have nothing to do with her finances.)
I’m sorry about your mom, tubagirl. Hopefully, they can manage her medication well and she’ll be better fairly soon. The sick forget; but the well and concerned remember the pain they caused. Mental problems can be a bitch sometimes.
Add my sympathies to the list - but I have to ask:
What more do you need? A lightning bolt to hit you?
A few weeks ago, you were considering cheating, now this!
You are so young…there is no hurry! My heart breaks for you.
Sweetie, maybe your Mom is upset with good reason.
I couldnt imagine getting married without my Mom…
good luck whatever you do.
Honey, I am so sorry for what you are having to go through. This should be the happiest time of your life, and life has really handed you a difficult situation.
Maybe the hospital can get your mom stabilized enough that she can get out for a day, or even a few hours, just enough so that she can be at the ceremony.
In any case, you have to decide what YOU want to do. Do you want to wait until she is better to get married? If so, then do it. Don’t worry about how it looks to other people. You do have to consider, however, that the same thing may happen the next time you plan your wedding. I know a little bit about bi-polar, and it appears that this thing with deciding to stop taking the medication that keeps you stable is quite common, particularly when the person is under stress.
Whatever you decide, I am going to be praying that you will do what is right for you, and sending you all the positive thoughts that I can.
I wish that my mom could be at the wedding. I would loveit if we could even sedate her so much that at least she WILL be there… BUt the truth is, this has happened at ever major event in my life since I was 8. If I delayed the wedding a month or so, it would happen again, even while on meds. i guess I’m just going to have the wedding and pray she is well enough to attend. I wont stop her.
I’m just terrified that she will be angry any time my wedding is brought up. I don’t want her upset. She always thinks that “we” are the bad guys and that she has never done anything to hurt me. I’ve been growing up with this since I was 8!
As for the “I’m too young” comments… Please don’t bring them to this thread. I’m already upset and I don’t want to defend my age and life choices on top of it all.
No hard feeling kellibelli… I didn’t say this as a shot as you… These threads just like to take off…
…there is so much that could be said here…I’d like to pour my heart out about the situation with my own daughter and her troubles. But this is about you. Even though I’m a raw newcomer to these boards, I’ve read a number of comments that you’ve posted and the chatter between members here and I’m thinking that you’re someone with a kind spirit and a good heart. There are no words of comfort I can give you…I can only hope that your day is a beautiful one and that, somehow, there will be a way that your family can share the love and joy and memories with you always.
You have my very best.
Yes, I’m a chick. My name is Lisa and I’m 19 soon to be 20. I’m not a “troll” and am just bored at work. I found this board and I liked it. I can prove I’m a girl if needed, and as for averthing being true. I can probly prove that too. My wedding pic will be submitted to the SD pages after Saterday…
I had a friend who had similar problems with her mom. (No wedding though) I found her attitude seem to work well for her. She did what she could do for her mom, but realized that there were things about her mother that she could not solve or control. She cherished the good times, but tried to take the bad ones with a grain of salt. The key thing was that her special moments were hers, not her mothers. And she wouldn’t let her mother spoil them.
Please try to remember that this moment is yours. Do what you want and need.
I know how hard it is to deal with loved ones with mental illness, it isn’t easy, but tuba I don’t think you have done the wrong thing. It is hard to accept and realise that people are trying to help you when you are going through what your mum is going through.
I just hope that this doesn’t throw too much of a cloud over your happy day. As Revedge said, some moments are yours and yours alone, don’t let other people change that.
Take care sweetie.
Well good news… I guess. The docs at the hospital are thinking of releasing my mom tommorrow. My dad went to see her today and he said she is pretty close to being herself. Basically the docs said we got her in there early enough that they could catch it before it went full blown.
The only problem is that my dad wants me to go see her tonight. He wants me to stop worrying so much about what “might” happen at the wedding. He says there is a vast improvement. I’m more than a little hesitant to do so. I don’t know what her adittude toward me will be. She was very angry at my dad, and I can’t handle her being angry at me as well.
I’m not bringing Chris at least. He has school tonight. He is completely freaked abut his whole episode. He always knew she did this. But he had never experienced it. She also saw him as her “out”. That he was the only one who understood him.
I really hope she is much better. I’ll post when I get back later tonight.
p.s. DropZone did apologize to me via email, and everythingis cool… Just letting you guys know.
